Revenge
by Elsa007
Summary: *ON HIATUS* During/Post Earth Skills. Bellamy starts to fall for Clarke. Charlotte and Wells become allies. Murphy resents that Clarke has taken his place as Bellamy's right hand and begins to abuse and manipulate her. But Clarke's not going down without a fight. Bellarke. (That summary was awful. Sorry. Just read it. I promise it's actually pretty good.)
1. Chapter 1

**Clarke**

"I'm not taking mine off." I insisted angrily, watching as one by one, the others were shedding their monitors for the promise of hot, fresh meat. Even as I spoke with conviction I couldn't help but wish I had already taken my wristband off. The cooking meat smelled amazing. My mouth was filling with saliva as I craved the sweat smelling food. Finn smiled at me and nudged my arm.

"Come on Princess, let's go find some of those not poisonous poison-flowers Monty was talking about the other day." I smiled back at his attempt to cheer me up. He seemed to read my mind at times. We slipped away from camp and searched the nearby area for the edible nuts, flowers and berries that Monty had pointed out to us on our first venture out into the woods. We stayed close, well within sight of the orange flames, licking at the black of night. Suddenly, I felt Finn's hand brush mine as we both reached for the same bloom. I froze as a fuzzy feeling crawled up from the spot we had touched. It wasn't a shock. Nor a spark, like in those Earth romance books I used to pour over. But it felt good. Other than guards and the brief hug with my mother, I hadn't been touched by another person since being thrown in the Skybox. It was nice to be with other people. And it was nice to feel the soft touch of someone else's hand against yours.

 **Bellamy**

Skywalker and the Princess snuck out of camp while no one was watching. No one. Except me. Wristbands, still intact. Fine. Suit yourself, I suppose. But the fact if the matter was that this was a trading system. You give us your monitor, we give you dinner. Keep your fancy watch if you must. Starve. See if we care.

Deep down in knew that wasn't true. Clarke was the only one here with any form of medical training. Without here, a lot of us would die. Not to mention if it came down to it and Clark tried to take control from me, there would be a good number of them who would follow her. The two of us needed to at least live and let live in order to keep the 100 together as one. I slowly made my way to the edge of camp, trying to seem nonchalant as I attempted to get a good look at where Spacewalker was taking his little girlfriend. When I finally got sight of the two I smirked. They were picking berries and gazing longingly into each other's eyes. What idiots. Eat your damn berries Princess. I would sit over here with my sister and enjoy a hot, delicious dinner.

 **Clarke**

My head ached and I was even hungrier than I'd been last night. So that's what being drunk felt like. Drinking half a bottle of whiskey having never had so much as a drop of moonshine in my life maybe wasn't the best idea. When I woke up, my head was resting on Finn's chest. He was still asleep, breathing deeply. Up and down. Up and down. His chest rose and fell calmingly, like I was being rocked in my sleep. I rubbed my eyes, glancing around. Wells was glaring at Finn like there was nothing in the world he'd like to do more than hit him. I rolled my eyes. Typical. Sunlight filled the automobile through the windows, illuminating everything in an odd sort of light. My eyes fell on the sunlit red of the seaweed we'd gathered yesterday. The seaweed for Jasper. Jasper. Practically leaping up and pulling my coat on, I nudged Finn awake.

"Come on. We need to get back to the camp. Like, yesterday." He nodded and shaking off the effects of sleep did his best to get ready and on his feet as quickly as he could. Wells was ready in an instant, annoyingly following my orders without a second's hesitation. As if being an obedient puppy would bring my father back to life. He opened the door and Finn gave me a leg up, helping me pull myself out of the overturned vehicle. I nodded my thanks to him and held out my hand to help pull him through the hatch as well. I did NOT offer the same assistance to Wells.

We hiked on, talking aimlessly about God only knows what. My brain was still a bit fuzzy, as if it was taking longer than usual to restart this morning, taking more effort than usual to focus on the world around me. Then we heard the scream. The heart wrenching, terrified and terrifying scream. We ran in the direction of the sound. I was the fastest, the others falling behind me. When I reached the scene my heart stilled. Bellamy. Leaning over a body. _Who was that?_ A distorted, horribly burned body gasping for breath, muttering words I couldn't say. I crept forward, kneeling before him. Oh shit. This was that boy Octavia liked. I had seen them kissing just the other day. I looked up at Bellamy. His face was covered in an emotion I didn't quite have words for. There was panic and sadness there too. He didn't know what to do. And he seemed to feel responsible.

Bellamy Blake. Cocksure, over confident, almost-let-me-fall-to-my-death, 'whatever the hell we want', Bellamy Blake. Scared. I gave the boy - _Atom? Was it Atom? – a_ look over. Acid burns everywhere. His lungs were shot, how he was even still breathing was beyond me. He must have inhaled some of the fog. That meant the inside of his lungs were just as burned as his outside. Damn.

"Kill me." He whispered staring at Bellamy. "Please." It wasn't the first time he had said those words to Bellamy, I was sure of it. But here, big tough, bad boy couldn't bring himself to do it. Couldn't bring himself to kill. I nodded, a twinge of pity running through me. I took the knife from Bellamy's hand and smiled down at the dying boy.

"Hey. Hey it's okay. I'm going to make it better, okay? I'm going to help you." I'd seen my mother kill before, bring peace to someone in pain. This was the right thing to do. I could bring him peace. I could take away his pain.

Sliding the knife into his throat was alarmingly easy. I expected that I'd have to try, really hard. That I would have to wind up and plunge the blade in. That somehow (even though I knew exactly how easy it was for a knife to cut through flesh) taking a man's life should be a lot more difficult than it was. But it was easy. In and out. And within a moment he was gone. I glanced up at Bellamy and was surprised to find him staring at me with another (different) indecipherable expression on his face.

"Come on Princess. Let's get him home." I nodded and handed him the knife back. Finn and Wells had caught up to me by now. I suspected they'd seen the entire thing. Damn. I couldn't meet their eyes. I couldn't look at anyone.

"He's at peace now." Finn said, putting his arm around me. "Now let's get this seaweed back to Jasper, huh? Let's save a life today."

 **Blake**

"He's at peace now." Spacewalker said soothingly to the Princess wrapping his arm around her protectively. "Now let's get this seaweed back to Jasper, huh?" His fingers were gripping her arm tightly, holding her, as though he could take away her pain. Take away any guilt she might have over what just happened. Didn't he know she was stronger than the lot of us? "Let's save a life today."

"So you found a cure than?" I asked, signaling some of the others to come back. Wells nodded and opened his pack, showing me some plant I could really care less about. Yet another twinge of guilt crept up on me. Jaha's son. Who didn't know he was an orphan. Because of me. Damn. "How do you know it'll work?" I asked the Princess. She loved this medical stuff. Let's get her focus off what she just had to do because I wasn't strong enough. Let's get her focused on something she loves.

"It was in the poultice the Grounders used to heal him. I think it will be even more effective if we put it in a tea of sorts." I nodded.

"That's very interesting. Will you just use water or will you want to put something else in as well?" Wells was giving me a weird look but Finn seemed to catch on and the two of us managed to ask her questions the entire time the others were fashioning a makeshift stretcher. By the time we'd gotten Atom onto it and begun our walk, she wasn't avoiding eye contact any more. Good. She didn't deserve any guilt here. She helped someone. Like she always did. She cared about and for our people. Better than I ever could. Damn. Today was not going like I had planned.

 **This was my first 100 fic - let me know how I did! Stuff you like, stuff you hate - I am trying to improve my writing so all criticism is welcome! *Remember - reviews make authors write faster! XOXO - E**


	2. Chapter 2

**Bellamy**

Shit. Octavia. She was going to blame me for Atom's death, I just knew it. To be fair, I was partially to blame. I couldn't save him. Not that I knew what I should have done differently that would have saved him, but I was the oldest here. I was responsible for these kids whom I had convinced to do 'whatever the hell they wanted' and now another one of them was dead. No more. I wasn't letting anyone else die. Not on my watch. But _shit._ Octavia.

And sure enough there she was, climbing out of the drop ship, making a bee line towards Clarke. Please God don't let Jasper die. Clarke can save him. She needs to save him. After the hell of today? Let Jasper live. I overheard bits and pieces of their conversation. _"Still alive." "Come quickly."_

And now she'd see. As Octavia looked to me curious as to what I was holding Clarke grabbed her arm and attempted to pull her back to the dropship. But my sister knew me better than anyone. And she saw the certain guilt in my eyes. I mentally thanked the Princess for trying to keep my sister away from this horrible sight. But she saw it anyway. And now she hated me. Again. She and Clarke made their way back, presumably to Jasper's side in an attempt to save him while I pulled Murphy aside.

"Jasper?" I asked, looking for a detailed update. Surely O had made sure everyone was aware of his condition and doing all they could to help him. I don't know what it was about the goggled boy but she seemed to have a soft spot for him.

"Still breathing. Barely." He began bitterly. Okay, so less compassionate than I'd expected, although I supposed that was to be expected. I had been the same way before I had watched a Mercy killing that should have been done by my hand be taken on by a girl who was, for all intents and purposes, still a child. "I tried to take him out but your psycho little sister…" Fire seethed through me. It wasn't just about Octavia (although that was a large portion of it. How dare he? Bastard! What the hell did he think of me? I'd punish Atom for loving my sister, what did he think I'd do to him for hating her?) but the idea that someone (my _sister!)_ had to fight to keep him from killing someone. I shuttered to think what Clarke would have done had she returned to find out someone had killed Jasper. We had to stop killing people. We had to start doing all that we could for every person here. We were family. We had to stick up for family. Your sister, your responsibility. Your family, your responsibility. I gripped Murphy's coat collar and threw him into the nearest tree, giving him a glare that I was certain would make him think twice about not only his actions but his words.

"My what?! My WHAT?!" I asked him, daring the boy to repeat himself. He chickened out.

"Your little sister." I nodded, looking back to those who had witnessed the event.

"Get Clarke whatever she needs." I nodded at a girl (Harper?) and she and her friend scurried off after Clarke. We were going to save Jasper if it took every person here. No one else was dying today. Speaking of every person here, I took a small survey of those around me. It felt like we were missing someone. Sure, Wells had stayed at the perimeter to keep watch and I knew there were a handful of the 100 in the dropship but someone was missing. Someone was not where they were supposed to be. It took me a minute but I finally realized what was wrong. Where the hell was Charlotte?

 **Clarke**

Jasper didn't die. In fact, he did a lot better than just 'not die'. Jasper was talking, sitting up, sleeping, and eating. He refused to take off his wristband but I saw Octavia (who had taken hers off to help Monty in his attempt to phone home) bring him a few slices off the meat we'd gotten off the jaguar. (Or whatever that thing was.) He'd offered me a bite but I wasn't about to take protein from a guy who'd been losing blood for days. The hatch swung open and Finn popped up with an armload of nuts and berries. After a quick double check from Monty that these were in fact the food sources he'd said were safe, we started splitting them up in rations for the next few days. I munched casually on some flower petals watching Octavia and Jasper laugh and chatter.

Suddenly a loud clatter rang through as the hatch swung open once again. Bellamy came barreling in leading Wells and Charlotte in his wake. I stood up, blocking his path to Jasper.

"He woke up." I insisted, still not moving from his path. "You said if I could cure him you wouldn't kill him well guess what? I did. He's alive. So back off." To my surprise it was Wells who spoke.

"It's not that, Clarke. His hand." I glanced down and instantly gasped. Bellamy's hand was clutched to his chest, wrapped in a scrap of cloth that was already soaked through with blood. The red liquid was dripping from his injured hand to his shirt and down his arm towards his elbow.

"What the hell happened?" I asked reaching for him. "Finn, get some of that seaweed over here. Octavia, get some water boiling. Monty, I need fresh bandages, I used all the ones we had on Jasper." The three rushed off to do my bidding and I looked back at Bellamy for an answer.

"It's not important. I got it stabbed." Charlotte was crying clutching something I couldn't quite see to her chest and Wells was looking around, dazed and rather confused looking. Bellamy held out his hand and pulled back the cloth they'd wrapped it in (part of Wells' shirt if I wasn't mistaken) and I saw that sticking out of his hand was a makeshift knife, one of the ones we'd made from broken off bits of the dropship.

"Shit man. I know I look cool all impaled and shit but I don't think you're really pulling it off like me." Jasper said quietly, joking yet not knowing if this was A) an appropriate time for such humor (It wasn't) or B) if Bellamy was cool enough to take a joke like that (surprisingly, he was). Bellamy laughed and smiled up at me.

"Can you fix it Princess? Or do I have to take my business elsewhere?" I rolled my eyes at him and ushered him to one of the dropship chairs to the side.

"As soon as the others get back with the supplies I need I'll get you fixed up. It will leave quite the scar but you aren't going to die. Not unless it gets infected or something."

"Great. So I'll only _maybe_ die. Something which you have control over and could easily just let me die with no one the wiser. I _knew_ I should have been nicer to you!" She joked, a spark in his eye.

"Says the guy who almost _did_ let me die just the other day." I muttered back under my breath. His brow furrowed and his good hand reached forward, gripping my arm.

"What the hell are you talking about?" His vice was dead serious now, as though he really had forgotten the moment when my heart beat so loudly I thought everyone could hear me as Bellamy Blake was the only think keeping me alive and I thought for sure he would drop me, tell everyone my hand slipped, that it was an accident, and get to lead the 100 all on his own.

"Please, allow me to set the scene." I returned, mirroring the sarcasm he'd been full of not two minutes earlier. "Jasper's hanging up on a tree. Dying. I fall into a trap. You grab my arm. You have a mental argument with yourself in regards to whether or not you should drop me."

"What?"

"Come on, Bellamy. We had our eyes locked. I could see the conflict there. I honestly thought you were going to drop me in there. Let me die." He was silent for a moment. God. That was supposed to be a joke. We were over that. We'd moved on. It wasn't supposed to be this serious talk. When he finally did speak, his voice was low and grave. Serious. Almost hurt.

"Well clearly you don't know me very well."

 **Bellamy**

"Please, allow me to set the scene." The Princess attempted to joke. The guy who almost let her die? Seriously! What the hell was she talking about?! "Jasper's hanging in a tree. Dying. I fall into a trap. You grab my arm. You have a mental argument with yourself in regards to whether or not you should drop me."

"What?" Drop her? I never would have dropped her! How was _that_ the explanation for my pause she came up with?

"Come on, Bellamy. We had our eyes locked. I could see the conflict there. I honestly thought you were going to drop me in there. Let me die." Drop her. Let her die. Was that really what she thought of me? It was the first time I'd touched her. Our hands were locked together. She had been looking up at me, straight into my eyes, looking for the first time, truly, like a damsel in distress, a Princess. For the first time she needed someone else. And I thought I had read a terror about that in her eyes. It had transfixed me. For the first time those blue eyes hadn't been confident, angry, sure of themselves. For the first time, I saw behind the façade. And I had been holding her soft, strong hands. Her skin had been touching mine. Our fingers intertwined. I had been in shock. Not just in shock. I had felt a physical shock. It was like I had wrapped my fingers around one of the electricity ridden prodding sticks the guards carried around on the Ark. I had NOT been about to drop her to her death!

"Well clearly you don't know me very well." I could hear the hurt in my own voice and I was sure she did too. Damn it to hell. I couldn't focus on that just yet. I had other issues to deal with. "Charlotte." I called out to the crying girl, motioning her to come towards me. "We need to talk."

"Don't hurt her!" It was Wells who called out in her defense, almost immediately. Both Charlotte and I looked up at him, shocked at his instantaneous protection of her. "Bellamy, she's just a child. Don't hurt her."

"Why on earth would he-" Clarke began to speak but I was too floated at the words.

"Is that really what you all think of me? That I just go around killing people who I disagree with?" Wells and Clarke both looked at me raising their eyebrows.

"I mean sort of." That was Octavia's voice. The others were back with the items the Princess had sent them out for. I swore under my breath. When had that become me? Hmm? When had I become known as a murderer?

"Well I'm not! I'm not going to hurt Charlotte. But we do need to discuss what happened."

"What happened?" Clarke's brow was furrowed as her eyes darted between the lot of us. Charlotte was crying again.

"You told me to slay my demons." She blubbered. The hand that wasn't throbbing with pain went to my face.

"Charlotte! That was not what I meant!"

"Bellamy, what is she talking about?" The Princess was frantic now. "Charlotte, did you stab Bellamy?"

"Not on purpose! I was just trying to feel safe! I was just trying to slay my dragons!"

"Charlotte." I looked straight into the little girl's eyes. "Slaying your demons does not involve killing innocent people!"

"Killing?!" Clarke's voice was high pitched and frantic now. "Was she trying to kill you?!"

"Not me." I assured her before turning back to Charlotte. "I gave you a knife so that if you were feeling attacked you felt you had a way to defend yourself. I wanted you to feel that you could protect yourself if one of your demons came chasing after you! I didn't give it to you so you could stab the son of your demon in the neck for no reason!"

"Calm down, Bellamy." Again, Wells was the first one to jump to Charlotte's defense. "It's completely understandable. After what my father did-after what everyone on the Ark did, I understand why Charlotte would be haunted by my being here." He turned to the little girl.

"I'm sorry Charlotte. What my father did was unforgivable. But I would never do something like that. I don't support killing people because they made a mistake. Can we figure out a way to be friends?" Charlotte looked on warily, giving no answer.

"Ahhh!" A scream of pain escaped my mouth as the Princess ripped the knife from my hand.

"Sorry!" She said immediately, sounding not sorry at all. "You were distracted, I figured that would be best." Blood was flowing freely now and Clarke was working quickly. "Okay, everyone here is getting in the way. Monty, Finn, why don't the two of you take Wells and Charlotte somewhere so you lot can talk and start figuring things out here. Octavia, can you get him something to eat? Get it ready but don't bring it up just yet. As soon as he's finished he'll be good to go and he can come down and eat with you." Once again they ran off to do her bidding and it struck me how utterly faithful in her they were. She asked for something and it was fetched without question. They trusted her. They believed in her. They knew that without her they would likely be dead. If she asked them to follow her, I had no doubt in my mind that most of them would up and leave camp, leave me. We had to work together or this camp would split in half.

"Bellamy this next part is going to hurt."

"The last part hurt!"

"I'm going to give you some stiches now, if I don't, you'll bleed out."

"So do it!"

"The pain is immense. On the Ark we could numb someone up a bit and no problem, they barely feel a thing. Here, that isn't an option. This will be excruciating. I hope you pass out early."

"What?!" Pass out? What was she talking about?

"People pass out from the pain. If you pass out early on, then I can do the rest without you feeling a thing. It will be better that way." She was avoiding eye contact and glancing back to the hatch every few moments.

"That's why you sent everyone away."

"They'll hear you scream. That will be hard enough for them, they shouldn't have to watch it too." She glanced over to the goggled boy I had forgotten was still there. "Sorry Jasper. I can't exactly get you out of the way."

"It's cool Princess," He said with a nod, lying back, his arm resting behind his head, acting as a pillow. "I'll just stare at the ceiling and pretend it's someone I don't like, like that douchebag. What's his name again?" He scratched his chin pretending to think. "Oh yeah! Bellamy Blake!" He smirked at me. "Oh…right…well this is awkward."

"Someone's clearly feeling better." Clarke grinned at him. "But next time, try out some jokes that are actually funny, yeah?" I grit my teeth, prepping for what's to come. If Octavia hears me scream she'll freak out. I can't scream. I have to stay quiet. Taking a deep breath I nodded at Clarke.

"Go ahead, Doc. Do your worst."

 **Author's Note: Thoughts? Please tell me! I am trying to improve my writing so all criticism is appreciated!**

 **Thank you so much to everyone who reviewed the last chapter! I really appreciated all of it!**

 **XOXO - E**


	3. Chapter 3

**Clarke**

He didn't scream. Not once. I was shocked. He had to be in immense pain and judging by how his eyes were watering and his lips pressed so firmly together they were turning white he wanted to scream. He wanted to get the feeling out. But he refused. Was this a pride thing? What was it? Had it been almost anyone else I was certain they'd have passed out after three or four stiches but he was still clinging on – literally, his good hand gripped the edge of the chair he was in so hard I was surprised it didn't break. When I finally tied the knot I was quick to pour him some of the seaweed tea I still had left over from Jasper's batch. "Drink. Now. Octavia will have some food ready for you by now."

 **Bellamy**

Pulling the clean strips of cloth Finn had oh so carefully laid out for the love of his life (as if laying out her medical supplies just so would make her fall in love with him back). She took my hand in hers and I flinched at the sensation. There it was. That shock again. What _was_ that?

"Sorry." She mumbled. "I didn't mean to hurt you."

"No, no that wasn't it." the words came out before I thought about them. Luckily, she didn't push it. She wound the white fabric around my hand methodically. I couldn't help but focus on the pressure of her fingers against my wrist as she held my hand in place.

"So let me see if I got this straight." Her voice was quiet again, unsure of itself. "Charlotte was moving to stab Wells, to kill him and you reached forward to stop the knife and got stabbed in the process." I nodded.

"Yeah. That's pretty much it."

"Why?" She asked. "You hate Wells." My brow furrowed.

"Even if that was true I'm not about a child murder someone just because I don't care for them." Is this really what people thought of me? "Besides, I figured another person dying today was NOT what you needed just now." She looked up into my eyes and I felt my heart leap at the sight of her deep blue eyes.

"Thank you." Shit. Oh shit of all shit. No. No Bellamy. Your heart does not _leap_ because of some (admittedly gorgeous) girl. She's your _sister's_ age. She's annoying as hell. She's opinionated and never listens and to be perfectly honest, can be kind of a bitch. She's awful. Horrible. You _hate_ her, Bell. I tried to convince myself. But hearing her practically whisper her gratitude as we practically held hands, I couldn't deny it anymore. I had feelings for Clarke Griffin. Shit.

 **Clarke**

"Hey Princess." I kept myself from visibly cringing at the mere sound of Murphy's voice but only just. Something about him made me squirm inside. "How's it feel to be one of Rebel King's favorites now? Hmm? Used to be me and Atom, but Atom's dead because Bellamy stopped giving a shit and I'm on the outs 'cause you replaced me." I rolled my eyes. Bellamy hated me. I was useful. I could heel his hand; I could help Octavia. We weren't friends. "Let that be a warning I guess princess, you're only in the middle circle until he finds someone better." Murphy eyed me up obviously. "And even in the limited populace of this camp, it'll be easy for him to find someone better."

"What do you want, Murphy?"

"I hear you and your jewelry-clad friends got themselves some food from the forest." He gripped my arm and held it, shaking it in front of me, forcing me to look straight at my wrist monitor.

"Yeah. What's it to you?"

"I'm hungry."

"So? You took off your monitor. Go get some of that meat you guys cooked earlier." I glanced at my father's watch. It was almost midnight. Thank God. Tomorrow couldn't get here soon enough.

"Nah. I'm craving something a little more…hmm…fruity. Heard you lot have some berries."

"Go away, Murphy." I turned to walk away but instead found myself slammed against the iron wall of the drop ship, Murphy's hot, rancid breath huffing putridly into my ear.

"I wasn't asking Princess. I was telling. Unless you want to see your little friend Monty here in your infirmary sometime soon, you need to hand over a few rations." My heart was pounding in my throat. Where had this come from? He could just as easily go out and get his own food. Why did he want mine?

"Fine! God, Murphy!" I swore, pushing him off of me. "I'll go get some, chill!" I hurried over to where I'd stocked mine, careful not to wake a sleeping Jasper. I could feel his eyes following me and nausea coursed through my stomach. What had provoked this? Why was he doing this? None of it made any sense! But he had threatened Monty. Maybe it was a power play sort of thing. Let me know what he could do and move along. Either way, I wasn't about to let him hurt my friends. And going without for a couple meals wasn't going to kill me.

 **Murphy**

I was having a lot of fun with the Princess. Ever since Bellamy had gone soft, he had been treating me more and more like the assholes on the Ark. I had found out what the little girl had done to his hand but when I tried to speak up for my so called "friend" Bellamy had gotten all defensive. That's right. Some child stabs him and not only does he not force her to talk off her wristband, but he brings her the best cuts of meat. She was obviously planning something. Why else would she spend all her time with Jaha? I had gone over to tease her _JUST A LITTLE BIT_ and Wells comes over and _attacks_ me. What does Bellamy do about it? Abso-freaking-lutely nothing. No he just gets all smiley because Jaha finally has a friend never mind that she's like 5 and annoying as shit.

That wasn't the only strange ass relationship forming around here. Bellamy and Finn were both falling heads over heels for her majesty Princess Bitch. They were both running around trying to make her smile, trying to make her life easier, trying to impress her and it was making me sick. So I started a bit of payback. At first I had just been trying to make her life miserable. But now that I realized the effect she was having on my life, I knew I had to do better. So I had.

Not only had I gone back to her little hiding stash and stolen a bunch of her food, but every day I came up with a new threat to keep her from leaving camp to get herself some provisions, or to force her to hand over whatever was left of her daily food. She was getting thinner and paler and it brought me an odd sort of satisfaction. She was angrier, had these dark circles under her eyes, and what's more? Because she was so in love with helping her friends or whatever, she didn't even fight back. She knew my group and I could easily take on her nerds and for all she knew Bellamy was still supporting us, (Somehow the Princess had yet to figure out just how in love with her Blake was.) so she never tried to narc on us. It was an excellent setup. And whenever the Grounders attacked (of course they were going to attack it was only a matter of time, they were savages for God's sake) she would be way too weak to defend herself. I wouldn't have _technically_ killed her. But she'd be dead. I smiled.

Speaking of Clarke, where was my favorite plaything? I didn't see her around camp and I was bored.

 **Please review! What did you love? What did you hate? Where do you want this ficlet to go? I want to know! Remember, reviews make authors write faster:) XOXO - E**


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Note: I don't have an exact timeline here and particularly because things are diverging from cannon and certain characters are alive that weren't in 100Cannon at this point and things are happening where the actions being taken by everyone are also not-cannon. This chapter is happening shortly after Raven lands? (or something like that?) I hope you enjoy it!**

 **Chapter 4**

 **Clarke**

"And how is my favorite Princess doing?" The voice I had grown to loath more than anything on the planet crept into my ear, my body instantly convulsed, trying to get away from the source of the sound as soon as possible. Unfortunately, away from Murphy meant into a chair and a dull pain emanated through my shin and up my leg. Damn! That would bruise.

"What do you want, Murphy?" I muttered, trying not to draw attention. If one of the guys came over and tried to protect me, Murphy and his sadistic freak-show friends would be sure to take it out on them. And as much as I loved Monty, he wasn't exactly up to defending himself against Murphy's idiots. "I already gave you my breakfast and lunch for today. I haven't eaten in two days. All I have left is a handful of nuts." I had been snacking on them all day. Savoring each one but sure not to eat too quickly and find myself without any food at all. I had to trick my brain into thinking it had been eating all day if I had any hopes of sleeping tonight.

"Oh come on Princess, I just wanted to tell you that Bellamy's hunting party just brought back a wild pig. They'll be cooking it as soon as they clean it up." My mouth was instantly watering at the thought of pork flesh roasting, the delectable scent wafting around camp. "Oh no! You're getting all excited! I should have clarified. The pig is for anyone who has taken off their hardware." He gripped my wrist in his hands. It was as though bugs were crawling over my skin. I shivered as a chill ran down my spine. Just then, my stomach growled. Damn. I'd been hoping to play it cool, like none of this bothered me, like I wasn't _that_ hungry. Then maybe he would get bored and find a new plaything. No such luck. The moment he heard the sound he grinned and winked. "Adorable." He said, simply. "Anyway, I wanted to ask a quick favor." Favor my ass, his tone made it perfectly clear this was no favor, this was an order. I feel that a nut crusted pork would be far more delicious than plain old wild pig." No. No. He couldn't be serious. I needed food. I would stop functioning normally pretty soon without food. "However, I feel like maybe being a bit, oh what's the word? That's right. Generous. I feel like being extra generous tonight. So I am going to let my little Princess keep her precious nuts." I sighed in relief. A moment too soon. "But it's going to cost you."

"What do I have that you could possibly want?"

"Well, for some reason that I still can't understand, people seem to like you around here. What's more, they follow you. They respect you. They see you as one of their leaders. Their other leader, of course, your little friend Bellamy. Who again, for some reason, won't just do the smart thing and kill you! Worse yet, he won't let one of us kill you! So much for no rules, huh?" So Bellamy had been serious about his pledge not to let anyone else die under his watch. Interesting. "People don't like me." No shit. Dumbass. "They don't respect me. They see me as…lower class. It's pathetic, really. I'm just as smart as Bellamy and unlike him I haven't turned into a scared little girl. I'm willing to do what it takes to keep my people safe."

"Keep _your_ friends safe you mean." I spat the words out before I could stop myself. He glowered at me.

"Of course that's what I mean. Anyone who cares about people who wouldn't care about them is a fool." His words made me freeze. Is that really how other people thought? Why care for someone who wouldn't do the same for you? Because we're all people, that's why. "Anyway, Princess, I need a favor. I need these mindless sheep to like me. So you are going to help me with that."

"And how do you expect me to get them to like _you_?" His lip was curled up into a snarl now, his hand around my wrist tightening exponentially and I could barely breath I was so terrified. But no way in hell I was letting him think he had the upper hand.

"You're going to like me. Publically. You're going to make everyone think that we're sleeping together."

"What?!"

"You heard me. It's that, or I take your precious nuts. And if I heard correctly, Spacewalker doesn't have another food scavenging outing planned until the day after tomorrow! So that's no food tonight, no food tomorrow, and no food until they come back successfully the day after. _If_ they come back successfully that is." His threat was clear. If I opted out of this, my friends were in danger. He was giving me the illusion of a choice, but at the end of the day, there was only one option. And it sucked.

 **Bellamy**

So I had feelings for Clarke. That was new. And now I was on my way to see her, a checkup or whatever for my hand. I shook my head. That made absolutely no sense. I was making no sense. She was messing with my head now. Damn.

"Bell!" Octavia's voice practically screamed in my ear. "What the hell? I've been yelling your name for like an hour!"

"An hour?" I questioned, raising one eyebrow. She rolled her eyes in return.

"Okay fine. But I've said your name at least 10 times." I blushed. I knew exactly why I hadn't heard her.

"Sorry. I'm a bit preoccupied." I turned towards the dropship. "What do you need O, I need to get my hand checked out."

"That's actually what I wanted to talk to you about. Jasper, Monty and I have been talking. Clarke's acting really weird. Monty thinks she's sick but Jasper thinks she's just heartsick over Finn." My stomach clenched angrily. It was ridiculous. I had no reason to be jealous. Of course the Spacewalker and the Princess had paired up so to speak. The only surprise there was that Spacewalker and Chancellor Junior hadn't gotten into more fights over her. "I don't think so. I think she's got her eye on someone but I don't think it's Finn." It was embarrassing how fast my eyes shot up to her face, silently begging her to elaborate. Luckily my sister had almost literally lived under a rock (okay under steel floors but that's almost the same thing) for 16 years and never noticed when I did something suspect like this.

"Why not?"

"Well if it were Finn they'd have started sleeping together already, or at the very least kissing and what have you. And ever since Finn's _girlfriend_ landed I don't think Clarke really trusts him anymore. He's been trying to get her to forgive him and to overlook everything. I may or may not have overheard him telling her he loves her yesterday and her telling him that he should be saying that to Raven." Never before had I had such conflicting emotions. On one hand, that bastard! Telling Clarke he loves her? He wasn't nearly good enough for her! And on the other hand, HA. That's right, HAHA. Dumped. That's right. Finn Collins got dumped. Clarke was smarter than I gave her credit for sometimes. Of course she wouldn't date Finn! He had betrayed her, lied to her, led her on. He was an ass. And she could obviously see it. A new emotion was filtering in…was that pride? Perhaps. I was proud of Clarke. Not that I had any reason to be. She wasn't mine. Likely she would never be mine. But hey, she wasn't going to belong to Finn Collins either. "That being said, she definitely has her eye on someone. That is a girl in some serious like if she hasn't quite reached the 'in-love' stage yet. Maybe it's Wells. I mean they did grow up together. And she stopped hating him for whatever he'd done to her." That was news to me. Last I checked, she'd been treating him with cold distain. He was necessary to get along with but she wasn't about to call them friends. "They did grow up together. Maybe they're in love!" There it was again. That clench so tight I wanted to vomit. "Bell, you're always so good at reading people! Go see her about your hand and see what you can find out!" My baby sister begged, gripping my hand tightly. I didn't have the heart to tell her that she was holding the damaged hand and was causing me what could only be described as excruciating pain to shoot through me. I sighed.

"I'll see what happens." I promised. She squealed in a very Octavia manner and scurried back to Goggles who was figuring out how easy it was to get girl's attention with a badass looking scar and his gardening friend whose name I could never remember. _Did it start with an M? Maybe…_

As I cleared the hatch into the Princess's little sanctuary a rather unexpected sight met my eyes. John Murphy. Siting close to Clarke. A bit too close. And laughing. Like she'd just made a joke he found hilarious. Since when were they friends? Octavia was right. Something weird was happening.

"You're adorable Princess." Murphy told her. Adorable? What?! I mean it was true but this was Murphy! This was coming out of left field like nothing else. He glanced up and grinned. "Hey Bell. What are you doing up here?" I raised my bandaged hand in response, not trusting my voice to remain calm and nonchalant. "Aha, I forgot about that. The great Bellamy Blake. Taken down by a little girl." Once again, he was laughing. "I'll see you later, Princess? Maybe we can take a walk or something."

"No one should leave the perimeter." The words were out before I realized I had opened my mouth.

"Grounders have been quiet, Blake."

"Too quiet. Octavia said her friend has warned her to stick close to camp." Where had that lie come from? "We're enforcing a curfew. No one is to leave the walls without a damn good reason."

"In case you hadn't noticed Blake, a few people around here haven't taken off their monitors yet. They still need to get food since you won't let them at the hunters' kill. I was going to take Clarke to get some nuts and berries tonight." Clarke perked up at this inexplicable, speaking for the first time since I got up here.

"You were?"

"Yeah. So do you want to?" Murphy asked with a grin. "A little vegetarian hunting trip in the moonlight tonight?" I held my breath, waiting for her to tell him to go to hell. Waiting for her to tell him she'd rather go alone. Waiting for her to tell him anything but what she did say.

"I would love that. When can we go?" What? Holy shit. No. Damn this to hell, no. Was Clarke into _Murphy?_ No. That wasn't possible.

"I'll meet you at the gate half an hour after sundown." Clarke glanced down at the too-large watch that she always wore and smiled.

"Thank you." Holy shit. She really meant it. She was seriously thanking him. What the damn hell? Clarke Griffin, Princess, Golden Girl, upper class royalty, two steps from the throne, was falling for _John Murphy._ No. Hell. No. This was turning into the worst day on earth. Well since I'd been on earth anyway.

 **Well? What did you think? Please review!**

 **XOXO - E**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

 **Bellamy Blake**

"Bell! Wait up!" Damn it O. She had the worst timing.

"I'm busy O." I growled, trying to stalk off as quickly as possible.

"Come on Bell, you promised! What did you think? Do you think she has her eye on someone? Who am I kidding? Of course you do! Who do you think it is?"

"I don't think, I know." My voice was still coming out in what could only be described as a growl. And there was nothing I could do to change that. "She's in love with John Murphy." O's burst of laughter echoed tauntingly in my ears.

"Don't be ridiculous Bell. I know you don't care but we want to know! We need to help our friend! Who do you think it is?" I spun around and grabbed her arm.

"O. She's seeing Murphy. He was laughing nauseatingly at some joke she told and they're going on a moonlit walk tonight." The look on her face perfectly reflecting the feeling of disgust inside me.

"Eww. You're kidding right?"

"I wish I was."

 **Octavia**

"Jasper." I knelt down behind my friends, muttering quietly, trying not to attract too much attention. "We have a problem."

"What's up?" Monty asked. In response all I had to do was point. Because as it turned out, Bell was right. There was Clarke, holding Murphy's damn hand and walking out the gates together plain as day in the moonlight. What the actual hell.

"No. No!" Monty was hissing his words, his eyes wide echoing my own thoughts.

"That is not really a thing is it?" Jasper had spun around and was gripping my shoulders tightly asking me a question that I too had thought to myself.

"Clarke wouldn't date Murphy." Wells said confidently. "She just wouldn't. That's not her type."

"Well fun fact, Bellamy went to get his hand checked out and Murphy was up there flirting and Clarke was letting him and then Murphy asked her to go for a moonlit walk and she said, and I quote, 'I'd love to' and if you just saw…. _that's exactly what they're doing right now!"_ I hissed at them. "I told you guys something was seriously wrong with Clarke! I mean I know that whole Finn situation really messed her up but still! _Murphy_?!" Wells turned to Charlotte (I hadn't actually realized she had been sitting there.) and nodded in what seemed to be a rather significant way. The girl nodded back and scampered off.

 **Clarke**

"We're well out of site of the camp. Can you take your arm off me now?" I hissed in his ear. Not waiting to hear the answer, I shrugged it off and practically lunged for the bush before me, covered in round, ripe, berries. Red, blue, purple, they all grew together, as though many breeds of fruit had banded together and formed one super-plant in order to survive the new Earth. Without thinking I glanced back at Murphy, asking for permission with my eyes. A moment later I realized what I had done. He controlled me. Fully and completely. John Murphy controlled me! I was starving and yet I looked to him to make sure I was _allowed_ to eat. What kind of person had I become? Then each and every time he threatened someone crept through my head. Each word he spoke against them, each phrase that suggested endangering their lives reminded me of who I was. I was a girl who would protect her friends, no her _family_ until the day she died. I was not weak. I was strong. And this was how I could protect them. Murphy nodded and held out his hand, as if inviting me to take a bite. I did not disappoint. I dove into the food and plucking as many berries as I could off into my fists. I gorged myself. So much so and so quickly that a few twigs and leaves ended up in my mouth along with the fruit and without a moment's hesitation they too, were chewed and swallowed down.

"Take it easy, Princess. You don't want to choke." Murphy commented with a wry smile. "Eat all you can out here. I think it's best if we don't take any food back with us. Let your friends scavenge for their own meals, yeah?" I thanked whatever powers may be for the darkness because God only knows what would have happened had Murphy seen the eye roll and look of disgust pointed at him in that moment. He crouched down next to me, keeping his voice low but close to me. "Remember, Princess. You're my girl now. You do what _I_ say." I nodded, hating myself the entire time, repeating my friends' names over and over again in my head like some sort of weird mantra that kept me going.

 **Bellamy**

"Bell, you've got to do something." Octavia hissed in my ear, pulling me aside. "You weren't kidding. Clarke and Murphy are dating. Like for real dating. Charlotte followed them for a bit and came back and told Wells who told Jasper who told Monty who told me that they walked around with his arm wrapped around her before they sat down by a bush and she ate berries like there was no tomorrow – which reminds me Bell. You really gotta let these people at the hunt. I mean we are killing plenty of prey for everyone now! Just because they won't take off their wristbands? I mean I took off my wristband in an attempt to directly contact the Ark and I get meat. It isn't fair and it isn't right and you should really rethink this. It isn't healthy, you know?"

"O, we made a rule. If I go back on it now after reinforcing it so hard earlier I will look weak. No one will believe me when I make threats and no one will think I am going to follow through on anything if I cave. It's a matter of principle and it is a political necessity. There are plenty of other food options. People on earth used to be vegetarians all the time. It isn't a big deal."

"Fine. We'll talk about it later." She huffed before returning to her original subject: the love life of Clarke and Murphy, which to be perfectly honest? Was even worse than any mistakes I may have made as far as rules regarding animals killed during a hunt and those remaining who wouldn't take off their monitors. Damn. "As I was saying. Apparently he just sat there and watched out over her as she ate and then a bunch of bugs were flying around Charlotte so she couldn't hear everything but she heard him tell Clarke that she was 'his girl' and saw Clarke agreeing to this statement like it was nothing and seriously Bell. That's not okay! You have to do something about it!"

"About what, O?!" I turned around and yelled at her. "What am I supposed to do? They are both nearly adults and as far as this group go they both also have a bit of sway with the others. They are just as much 'in-charge' as I am and even if they weren't? What am I supposed to say? Oh. Hey guys! I see that you two are falling in love! Well that's nice but its freaking my baby sister out because she doesn't think he's good enough for you Clarke. So I'm going to have to insist that you two stop seeing each other romantically if you know what I mean." O crossed her arms and glared at me.

"No. You're supposed to talk to her because she listens to you and you are supposed to figure out what is going on because there is no way in hell Clarke Griffin woke up one day and decided that John Murphy was a nice guy, hmm, I'd like to torture myself by _dating_ him. Something is wrong and she won't talk to any of us but you have to go see her all the time to check on your stupid hand so you have time alone with her and as your _baby sister_ I am asking you to talk to her and figure out what is going on." Just then a rustling noise reached my ears. I glanced in the direction from which it came and noticed that Murphy and Clarke were back.

Did that make me happy or upset? I couldn't tell. On one hand, seeing them together and watching them return to camp, hand in hand was nauseating and it was an image I did NOT want in my head. But on the other, if they were here, so soon after leaving, it wasn't like they were out _there_ doing _something else_. But then I realized: they weren't carrying food. They had _not_ been out there scavenging and collecting food for all of her friends. They'd just been out for a walk. In the moonlight. Doing God only knew what. Upset. I was definitely, very, very upset.

 **Author's note: So lovely readers, what did you think? Is it good? Is it horrendous? Is it some mixture thereof? Please, please, pretty please tell me! I want to improve my writing so all critique positive, negative and savage af is so helpful and very much appreciated! Thank you!**


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

 **Clarke**

Food. I had just eaten. Nuts. Berries. I'd even swiped some of that plant that tasted like toothpaste on the walk back and shoved it in my pocket without Murphy noticing. My head was feeling clearer than it had in days. Yes I was disgusted with what was happening with Murphy. But I was protecting my friends. I was doing the right thing. This was what was best. He could threaten me all he liked but just before we'd gotten back he suggested that my friend Jasper would look particularly good with fewer fingers. And with Bellamy's damn 'whatever the hell we want' motto he could get away with it too. There was no justice down here. Only power. Murphy had it. I didn't. So I would have to do what I could to save my friends.

I chewed on the leaves that Monty had called mint as I sat on the floor of the dropship. I'd swiped a burnt stick out of one of the fires. That was as good as a charcoal pencil. I could draw. But I couldn't. What was I supposed to draw? Before I'd gotten on that dropship I'd drawn Earth all the time. It was a place full of opportunity, full of hope. But now? Now that I'd gotten down here all I could see were the ways I'd failed, the ways no one listened to me when I tried to help them. The ways I had led Octavia to be attacked by a sea monster, led Jasper to get a spear to the chest, led Charlotte to try to do something unspeakable to Wells. I had failed everyone. And it was all I could do to keep Murphy from outright attacking them. I was a failure. I had no hope. So what was I to draw now?

 **Finn**

What did she want from me? I'd apologized a hundred times. I'd explained so carefully that I hadn't thought I would ever see Raven again, that I really did have feelings for her. And then I'd seen how Bellamy looked at her, how he had feelings for her even if no one else noticed. He'd grabbed her hand as she fell into that pit and she'd mentioned later she thought he was going to drop her, let her die. She somehow didn't noticed that he had been looking at her, his eyes filling with worry, startled into pausing by her very touch. (I would be the first to admit her touching her was electric but really Bellamy? Can't keep it to yourself?) I was lucky she thought he hated her though anyone with eyes could see he'd have fought me for her in an instant if she'd give him the slightest hint that she may be interested.

The funny thing was, I was so focused on staying on Clarke's good side and keeping Bellamy away from her that I hadn't noticed _John Murphy_ of all people sneaking into the mix. And _he_ had somehow stolen her heart. How was that possible? It was _John freaking Murphy._ And yet they were outright dating. He'd taken her on a moonlit walk a few nights ago and now they'd walk around camp, Clarke weirdly quiet as he held her hand or pulled her close for a quick kiss on the cheek that turned my stomach and made me want to vomit or the ultimate kicker, when he played with the ends of her hair. And she just let him.

It was disgusting.

He was disgusting.

He broke my heart.

 **Bellamy**

 _Get your God damned, disgusting, bastard fingers off her hair._ No. No Bellamy. You are NOT protective of Clarke Griffin. You knew she was annoying but not you know she's also an idiot because she agreed to date John Murphy and Bellamy Blake does not go for idiots. Well, yes he does, but only when they're slutty idiots who won't be pissed when I never talk to them again. You know…low maintenance. And Clarke Griffin was NOT low maintenance. And I was NOT into her. Not anymore. I had a brief crush on her. Which was fine, of course. She was hot. There was nothing wrong with noticing that. I'm sure every guy in camp at some point had taken notice of her.

 _He's still playing with her hair. I wonder what her hair feels like. Is it as soft as it looks? Is_ she _as soft as she looks? Whatever. It's not like you're ever going to find out._ The voice in the back of my mind was getting louder. And more annoying. And it was kind of an asshole. I just had to ignore it. After all, it was kind of right. It _wasn't_ like I was ever going find any of these things out. _But you want to Bellamy._ Asshole.

 **Clarke**

"Hey Princess." _Don't call me that Murphy._ "I think some people were a bit…disconcerted by our little date the other night." _It wasn't a date Murphy._ "So maybe we stick around camp more, no more wandering out and scavenging."

"Murphy, come on, I'm so hungry."

"Yeah? You hungry? 'Cause my friends are pretty hungry too. But not for food. I'd say they're hungry for your friend Octavia. She looks pretty delicious." I stiffened.

"Bellamy would kill you."

"Fine. Monroe, Harper," he paused. "Take your pick Princess. You've got plenty of pretty friends. Friends who I'd sure love to do whatever the hell I want to, not to mention what my friends are thinking. Sure I'm holding them back now, but I don't know how much longer I can keep that up." He took a breath and pulled my chin so that he could stare directly in my eyes. "Let me explain myself here. If you decide to go out on your own, I can't protect you. That's you deciding that you don't need my protection. And if I'm not protecting you then I won't feel obligated to protect your friends. Do you understand?" He was a monster. He was an absolute monster. Why did he do this? Why did he want to do any of these things? What was he getting out of this? "So what do you say, Princess? Are you going to go out on your own? Or will I protect your friends?"

"I think I'll just go to bed." I said, standing up. "After all, it's not like I'm going anywhere else." His smile sickened me and I had to turn away to hide my obvious disgust.

"Good choice, Princess. Goodnight."

 **Author's Note: What do you think? I know there wasn't as much plot in this one as an exploration of some emotions going on but it was an important thing to have before the next chapter which should have a bit more action:) I hope you are all enjoying this! I would love to hear what you all think! What do you want to see out of this fic? What do you like about it? What do you hate about it? Please tell me! I am trying to improve my writing so any and all criticism is very welcome!**

 **P.S. There will be a bit of a longer wait for the update because the next chapter is going to be long. As in...VERY long.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

 **Bellamy**

I awoke early. Earlier than usual. _Way_ earlier than usual. The sun was barely up in the sky, the morning mist painting everything in shades of grey. Everything on this planet was so beautiful. And none of it stagnant. On the Ark there was nothing to suggest whether it was night or day other than how many lights were on. But here, on earth, everything changed. Different weather, different times of day, even each day from one another. Nothing was ever the same. And that was beautiful. I turned over, trying to go back to sleep but I suddenly found that despite how tired I was, I was wide awake. Peeling open the flap of my tent, I glanced at the watch on the arm of the girl beside me in bed. 4:30 in the morning. I groaned. You have got to be kidding me! I was exhausted. And yet I was wide awake. Almost on edge. _That's right Bell, you're on edge. Why is that?_ There it was. That annoying voice inside my head who…wait what? Why am I on edge? Because I most definitely _was_ on edge now I thought about it.

Oh no. Something was wrong. I leapt to my feet and pulled on my pants and struggled to get into my shirt as quickly as I could. Jacket in hand I all but ran out of my tent and hastened over to the shelter Octavia shared with Jasper and Monty (not that I approved of this arrangement but at least those idiots told me when she ran off to meet that Grounder in the middle of the night – something I most _definitely_ did not approve of). Pulling back the flap I sighed in relief. There she was, snuggled up in her blanket, safe, sound and a small smile playing on her lips. I stopped to slip my jacket on now. If she was safe then I had a moment to breathe. What was the matter with me? I was freaking out now. It was because I wasn't getting enough sleep. I made my way back towards my tent, shivering to shake off the early morning chill. That was when I saw her. I froze.

She sat alone, perched on one of the logs we'd set out around the main fire ring. She wore a thin tank top and my first thought was that she must be freezing. (My second may have had something to do with how beautiful she looked in it but that wasn't the point.) There were bags under her eyes as though she too, was sleeping poorly, she was thin, too thin and she kept glancing nervously between the drop ship and each of the tunnels out of our camp. Beautiful she may be, but she was also a wreck. I walked over and plopped myself down beside her. She jumped, nervously before closing her eyes and taking a deep breath.

"God, Bellamy, you scared me."

"Brave Princess? Afraid? Never." She rolled her eyes as she had a thousand times but there was no hint of amusement in them. "What are you doing up so early?" She shrugged.

"Wishful thinking I guess." She muttered, seemingly not wanting me to actually hear her.

"What does that mean?" She blushed at my question and shook her head quickly, surprised that I had caught on, perhaps?

"Nothing!" I snorted out a laugh.

"Yeah. Because that sounded like nothing. Come on Princess, what's with you lately? You're freaking my sister out." Again she shook her head quickly. Too quickly. My heart was beating fast, as though I was anxious. Over what? Nothing was happening! Everything by all accounts was just fine! And yet my guard was up, something inside of me knew that something was very wrong here.

"They're just mad I didn't tell them that Murphy and I were together." A sharp pain echoed through my chest as she said the words. I paused, not sure I wanted to dig deeper. _What the hell, Bellamy. You're already this far. Might as well jump off the cliff, yeah?_ I sighed.

"Since you brought it up, what is that all about? Why didn't you tell them? They're your best friends. It's weird." In an odd combination of events, she went from frowning, introspectively to giving me the first genuine smile I'd seen on her face in a long time.

"If you were seeing Murphy would you tell anyone?"

"Aha, the Princess is joking now?" The smile on her lips grew, though still soft. "I see your point. It's not exactly your finest moment." Hmm. Interesting. For a girl who was supposedly into this guy and was seeing him regularly, the fact that she didn't so much as bat an eye when I insulted him was a bit odd. _Test the theory perhaps_? "I mean he's an ass and what's more? He's a complete idiot and not worthy of Her Majesty's attentions." I mock bowed to her. The smile was gone but she wasn't defending him. "And not just kind of an ass, I mean-"

"Save it, Bellamy. I mean you're 'kind of an ass' too, don't you think? It's a bit rich for you to be throwing out that kind of insult."

"There's a difference." I protested.

"How so?" She challenged. Damn. How did she not get it? I was an ass, yes. I knew that. Especially to her but I was an ass because I- No. No. I couldn't say that to her. _He_ was an ass because he was an idiot and just plain cruel. And he- ugh! I don't know.

"I know I'm an ass. But he's…"

"He's what exactly?" It wasn't her voice this time that interrupted me. I spun around to see Murphy standing with a glare behind us. We were all silent as the two of us stared one another down. Finally, he broke eye contact but my victory was short lived as Clarke stood up and walked to his side, hugging him. He smirked at me as she held him and I knew that I was shaking in anger.

"Come back to bed sweetie. It's cold up there without you." My hands were balled into fists at my sides and I longed to hit something until it broke. Preferably Murphy's face. But Murphy's face was no longer in proximity to me. Instead he and Clarke had disappeared back into the dropship, his arm wrapped territorially around her. So I settled for a tree.

I didn't break the tree.

I did break my hand.

 **Clarke**

Damn. Damn it all to hell. My gut was in a constant state of agony, my limbs were tired and sore. My head pounded and all I wanted to do was eat and sleep. But I couldn't sleep. Because I was being forced to sleep beside him. And with the smell of him so close at hand, I couldn't stop thinking about him. And the more I thought about him, the more I thought about what he and his friends might to my friends if I didn't do as he said. To be fair, he found a way to keep relatively clean and it wasn't as though I wanted to vomit from the smell – no my wish to vomit in his proximity had to do with something else entirely.

At least this morning I had managed to sneak out without him waking up. I hadn't been able to sleep very heavily so a few snores from him and I was wide awake. I had gotten out from underneath his arm and crept away from him as slowly and silently as I could manage. He hadn't woken up. I had gotten out of the dropship and he was still asleep. No one was around, I could sneak out of the tunnels and find some food. _And if he finds out what you've done?_ No. I'm starving. I need this. _What will he do to you if he finds out? What will he do to your friends if he finds out? Are you really thinking clearly Clarke?_ Am I really thinking clearly?

I had begun to exhibit some of the warning signs of both starvation and sleep deprivation and it terrified me. What if, in my unwell state, I did something stupid that he took as disobedience and then he hurt Monty and Jasper? Or went after Raven. Octavia was safe. Bellamy may be an ass that was enforcing the rules to keep me and a few of the others from eating, he may fully support what Murphy was doing, but he did love his sister more than anything. And he would protect her. This much I knew was true. But Raven. She and I hadn't had the opportunity to grow close but I admired her greatly. I knew that if the situation was different, we would become friends. _She would be smart enough to figure out another way. She could save her friends without having to sacrifice herself. She could keep them safe and she would still fight back. She was better than me._

Out of nowhere a large body all but threw itself on the log next to me. It took everything in me not to scream.

"God, Bellamy, you scared me."

"Brave Princess? Afraid? Never." I felt as though his words mocked me. Not afraid? I was afraid of everything. Now more than ever. "What are you doing up so early?" I shrugged in response.

"Wishful thinking I guess." I murmured under my breath, realizing too late that I'd said it out loud. _God I hope he didn't hear that._

"What does that mean?" Damn. He had. I just shook my head.

"Nothing." I insisted as he laughed.

"Yeah. Because that sounded like nothing. Come on Princess, what's with you lately? You're freaking my sister out." Great. Octavia knew something was up. As in the girl who lived over a decade under the floor and never quite figured out the whole 'reading other people' thing knew that something was wrong. I was shit at this. _Or maybe not. Maybe they were just pissed about Murphy? I could work with that._

"They're just mad I didn't tell them that Murphy and I were together." After a pause that seemed to take an eternity, he pushed forward.

"Since you brought it up, what is that all about? Why didn't you tell them? They're your best friends. It's weird." Why did he care? He didn't care about me and that was fine. We worked together to protect the hundred. That didn't make us allies of any sort. He'd made that clear when he kept me and mine from eating. He'd made that clear when he'd laughed at Murphy's "conquest" – AKA me, (something I'd learned from Murphy himself as he gloated annoyingly to me). Did he just want to be amused? There was nothing amusing about this. Well…actually…a joke (albeit a rather stupid one) popped into my head and I spoke before I could think about it.

"If you were seeing Murphy, would you tell anyone?"

"Aha, the Princess is joking now?" Huh. I guess I was. "I see your point. It's not exactly your finest moment." Maybe not. But I was protecting my friends. And of that I could be proud. "I mean, he's an ass and what's more? He's a complete idiot and not worthy of Her Majesty's attentions." So that was it. He was here to mock me. He brought joy in belittling me. He'd laughed at the so called 'conquest' of my virtue to Murphy and now he wanted to make me feel shit for it. "And not just kind of an ass, I mean-"

"Save it Bellamy." I cut him off before he could finish. "I mean, you're kind of an ass too don't you think" It's a bit rich for you to be throwing out that kind of insult."

"There's a difference." Oh, yes, Bellamy Blake. Go on. Explain to me how making me feel like shit and being a complete bastard is somehow more high and mighty than the lowly disgustingness that Murphy portrayed.

"How so?"

"I know I'm an ass. But he's…" he trailed off, unsure of the ending to that sentence.

"He's what exactly?" Murphy. He'd woken up. _Well, I guess it's a good thing Bellamy sat down or you might have gone off into the woods and Murphy would have caught you. And now? Well fuck. Now they'd fight and if Murphy had the camp backing him it would be hard for Blake to protect Octavia. I couldn't have that._ I shook off the voice before it said something about how I wanted to protect the male Blake as well and I leapt to my feet. I walked over to Murphy and wrapped him in a hug. I leaned forward and whispered in his ear.

"If you want to improve your standing around camp beating on everyone's favorite dipshit isn't going to do that." He paused and my heart jumped into my throat as I waited for him to make his move. Finally, after what felt like half a life time he spoke.

"Come back to bed sweetie. It's cold up there without you." I sighed in relief and followed him back to the drop ship. His arm wrapped around me and he leaned in to whisper. "Good call, Princess. You're finally getting the hang of this."

"Maybe I'd be getting the hang of it faster if I wasn't starving." We'd just stepped through the dropship door and the moment the words came out of my mouth he pushed me up against the wall.

"What was that?"

"Come on Murphy. I'm starving. Literally. Please."

"Shut it, Princess. You can manage."

Not two hours later Bellamy Blake was sitting in the med bay with a blue and purple hand.

"It's not broken, just bruised to hell and back." He grumbled something I couldn't understand. And didn't try to. I was getting dizzy. I couldn't focus. My head was pounding. Damn. This wasn't good. I felt myself swaying and the world around me began to fall. Two strong arms swept me off my feet.

"Clarke!" Bellamy's deep voice sounded like it was echoing through the tunnel. "Clarke what's wrong." I tried to shake my head, to brush him off.

"Just tired. See Monty about your hand. He'll help you out."

"Clarke, something's wrong with you. What's happened?"

"Bell….so tired."

"Monty!" his voice was loud, frantic in my ear. "Monty! Come quick! Something's wrong with Clarke!"

"I'm fine…" I tried to reason with him. "I'm fine…just…put me down. Your hand...you shouldn't be…"

"Bellamy. What the hell are you doing, holding my girl?" Fuck. Murphy. That was the last thing I heard before I passed out.

 **Thoughts? I am working on the next chapter presently and will have it up soon! I promise that the real action is going to start soon! Thanks to everyone for all your reviews! I love you all – XOXO – E**


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

 **Bellamy**

I ground my teeth in an attempt to keep my cool in front of them all. "She passed out Murphy. There's something wrong with her. I'm just trying to help."

"What were you doing up here in the first place, Blake?"

"I hurt my hand. Your _girlfriend_ is a healer." I spat the word out, unable to contain the anger I felt towards it. "She was starting to fix me up and she started swaying. Someone get her some water! Monty! Get your ass up here!"

"First, you'll put down _my_ girlfriend." I saw red. Literally. Everything around me swam through a red haze. My skin itched as I imagined the wondrous feeling of Murphy's jaw cracking and breaking beneath my fist.

"Go to hell Murphy. This isn't a pissing contest. I'm worried about Clarke, an emotion you don't seem to be feeling." I accused him. Maybe that made me madder than anything else. (Okay, no. The fact that Clarke was romantically involved with this bastard who didn't deserve to speak to her let alone be allowed to love her, that pissed me off the most. But the second most at least.) I was terrified for her. There was something seriously wrong with her. And Murphy was just concerned with the fact that I was within spitting distance of her. Possessive bastard. He was right, though. Sort of, anyway. Monty couldn't look at her if I was just holding onto her like this. I moved to a hammock and laid her down, barely holding myself back from brushing the hair away from her face and stroking her soft, too pale cheek to let her know that I was here, that I would do whatever it took to save her.

"I'm not worried because I know what's wrong." I slowly turned away from Clarke and faced the man I hated most. "So I know she'll be just fine."

"What's wrong with her?" I growled. Murphey smirked at me.

"She needs some food." I frowned. She had been exhibiting signs of slow starvation but if Murphy knew that why the hell hadn't he said something? This could all have been avoided.

"She only eats plants and vegetation and then after last night…" He trailed off.

"After last night what?" I spat the words out, not wanting to ask the question and yet I needed to know.

"What can I say, Blake? I wore the Princess out in a way that only a man from factory station can." He had not just said that. My hands instantly became fists and my hands shook like leaves in a storm. "Took her out behind the dropship and had her majesty down on her knees." A noise like a banshee ripped through me and Murphy paused, taking in my predatory stance. "Oh that's right, Blake. You're in love with my girl."

"Shut up Murphy." The hatch swung open and Finn and Monty struggled through it, pausing to take in the tableau before them.

"What the hell took you two so long? I've been yelling for Monty for ages."

"Sorry, man. No one heard you. We came up when we heard your primal scream at Murphy."

"Monty. Look after Clarke." I nodded my head in the right direction and the boys noticed her presence for the first time. Finn cried out her name and I had to bite my tongue and remind myself that I had to focus on my anger at Murphy and deal with the jealousy I felt over Finn later.

"What happened?" Monty asked, moving into healer mode.

"She hasn't been eating that much and I wore her out last night."

"Murphy, I'm warning you. Whatever you're thinking about it, keep it to yourself. Don't disrespect her like this."

"Don't you want me to tell you about it lover boy? It is probably the closest you're going to get to being with her." I said nothing, doing my best to keep from losing my cool. "The things I could tell you about how her skin feels beneath your hands, how she moans, so wanting, so needing, how she tastes-" Finn and I let out twin growls of anger that were not quite human noises.

"Murphy," Finn began having stepped beside me and glowering at the man in question.

"Oh! Is that what you want to hear about? How she tastes? Well who am I to deny you! When you kiss Clarke Griffin, you are able to taste the most delicate salty flavor. It becomes increasingly stronger and enticing the deeper your tongue plunges itself deeper within the depth of the Princess's mouth." I was snarling now, I had never felt fury like this. How dare he? How _dare_ he?

"Murphy, I swear to you," I began, unsure of what I could threaten that would fully encompass the anger I was feeling.

"Or were those not the taste you were inquiring about?" No. He wouldn't. He hadn't. This was not happening. "Perhaps you wished to know about the taste of her sweat, dripping down her neck and into the valley of those magnificent tits, or the tangy, sour liquid that leaked out when my head was between her-"

"You bastard. Don't you DARE talk about her like that you disgusting piece of sh-" And then Finn was at my back pulling me away. "Finn what the hell? He just-"

"He's lying Bellamy. He's lying to screw with you can't you see that?" He shook his head at me, holding my arms back with everything he could manage. "He's lying to you. He has no idea." Murphy had stopped talking, realizing somewhere along this line that he may have gone too far that did a little to settle the monster raging inside me. I was panting and I stared at Murphy with every fiber of hate in my body making it perfectly clear how I felt about him.

"If you dare to speak about her in such a cavalier way again you will find out exactly how far my wrath can go." He looked up at me, his forehead screwed up and looking thoroughly frustrated at how the day had turned out. "Get out of my sight before I change my mind." He disappeared without so much as a glance towards Clarke. Damn that bastard to hell. He had her. He had the most incredible woman on this planet and in the sky above and he didn't give rat's ass about her wellbeing. I took a few deep breaths to calm down and flexed my fingers. Damn that hurt. Clenching your fist when it's bruised to hell and back is not exactly the best treatment. I returned to Clarke's side and looked up to Monty.

"I'm not about to verify everything else he's said but she is starving. Bellamy, I know you have those rules about eating the hunter's food when we've still got our wristbands on, but-"

"We ran out of meat last night. Finn, go make some tea." I stood and hastened towards the hatch.

"What are you going to do?" he asked me as he raced to catch up. I looked at him as though he were crazy. Wasn't it obvious?

"I'm going to kill something she can eat." We strode out into the sunlight and I quickly grabbed my gear. "Miller, Wells, with me."

"We're going hunting now?" Miller asked as he saw the supplies I was quickly assembling.

"Clarke's starving. If we don't get her protein soon she's going to die. We finished off the last wild boar last night."

"She hasn't taken off her wristband." Miller commented. I snarled and spun around angrily.

"Our only competent healer will die if we don't get her food. If you are going to let a stupid fight with those assholes on the Ark get in the way of our survival then I will find someone else to help me." Wells hadn't said a word but I saw him give Charlotte a quick hug.

"I'll be back soon." He murmured to her. "If anyone gives you trouble go hang out with Octavia or Raven for a bit. They'll protect you." A small smile graced my lips and I realized that it was pride for my sister. I didn't want her anywhere near the fighting but I knew she was strong and in command here. I was proud of the woman she'd become. We'd gone no further than 100 feet from the gates of camp when Finn caught up to us.

"Jasper and Monty said there's nothing else I can do there. I want to help." He said in explanation. "Fox and Raven are keeping an eye on Murphy. He won't do anything to her while we're gone." I nodded, grateful he'd thought to take care of that. We trekked forward, in search of game.

It wasn't long before Finn found footprints of some animal on the ground. He claimed they were from the wild pigs but they looked a bit bigger than the tracks we'd followed in the past. It took our little troupe half an hour to bag one of the fattest pigs I'd ever seen and get ready to return to camp. Finn and I cleaned our weapons and took measures to cover our own tracks as Wells and Miller prepared the beast for transport.

"How did you know?" I asked, quietly.

"Know what?" Finn responded, not really paying that much attention to me.

"How did you know he was lying? You were so sure he was bluffing. Sure beyond a doubt. How did you know?" Finn paused, looking up at me warily.

"This stays between us." He said quietly, glancing over his shoulder to be sure Wells and Miller weren't paying attention. I nodded, and he continued. "Before Raven came down to Earth, I thought we'd never see anyone on the Ark again. That it was just us, just The 100. This was a fresh start, a new life." Again I nodded, staying silent and allowing him to explain what the hell this had to do with Murphy and Clarke. Had this been going on that long? Had Murphy and Clarke been seeing each other since we landed? "I realized that I had feelings for Clarke and I thought I'd never see Raven again, so…" he trailed off. Son. Of. A. Bitch. Had _everyone_ realized that they had feelings for Clarke before me? Was I the last idiot to admit to myself how utterly incredible she was? Was I the last in line to throw my hat in the ring? To admit to myself that I could let down my walls, that I could allow myself to feel for someone _,_ for _any_ one? If I had figured this all out sooner could I have prevented all of this? If i had allowed myself to see what truly mattered, rather than being scared and selfish, could I have convinced Clarke that I was worth a shot? Could she have developed feelings for me? Damn to hell. Why couldn't I just admit that I had feelings for her? I was a fool. And I was going to lose her for it. Lose her. Was that the right sentiment? Could I really lose something I never had?

"Bellamy, don't be pissed." Finn grumbled, not meeting my eye. What had I missed?

"What? Sorry, I was thinking. Don't be pissed about what?" Finn sighed and closed his eyes.

"I was falling for her. And we clicked, you know? There was something there. And then one night, Clarke needed someone. I needed her. We snuck off and we...well...we hooked up. It only happened a few times after that. Then she stopped it."

"And this all happened while you were dating Raven." It wasn't a question. I just needed clarification. I needed the full picture before I allowed myself to feel the jealousy and anger that was certainly blowing over the horizon towards me. Finn had been double timing Clarke and Raven. Just how bad _was_ Clarke's taste in men?

"Yes. Clarke broke it off as soon as she found out of course, and not long after that she and Murphy were seeing each other. But I knew Murphy was lying about having slept with Clarke because he was wrong. Completely and utterly wrong." I shut my eyes and took a deep breath, trying to calm myself. "She's not salty. Her lips taste sweet, like honey, no, more like the flowers she's always eating. And it's not as if that has changed, all she eats these days are those flowers." His voice grew soft and I realized that he wasn't talking to me. He was talking to himself, remembering her, missing her. "There's no tang. She's more metallic, like iron or steel. Makes sense. She's stronger than metal and-"

"You're telling me, that you knew Murphy was lying, because when he said what she _tasted_ like, you decided his analysis was inaccurate." What the actual hell. When had this become my life? "And you are aware of this, because you have, not only..." I shuddered, " _Tasted_ each of these parts of her, but also because it meant enough to you to catalog it into memory?" He took half a step back, the glower I was sending his way was likely terrifying. At least I hopped it was.

"No. Bellamy, it isn't like that."

"That wasn't what you were saying? Because I'm fairly certain that is precisely what you were saying."

"Bellamy. Come on. You've been an asshole to her since you first spoke to her. And if you recall? That was before we even opened the dropship door. And you haven't treated her any differently since. I get it. You obviously have feelings for her. But you don't have claim to her. No more than Murphy nor I do. In fact, a hell of a lot _less_ than Murphy or I do. Her starvation is half your fault! You wont let anyone who hasn't taken off their wristbands to eat from the hunt." This was _not_ my fault. How DARE he suggest that this situation was my fault!

"Finn." I growled. "She isn't a _possession._ None of us has a _claim_ to her." He rolled his eyes.

"You're over reacting. You understand exactly what I meant."

"I'm just trying to say-"

"You love her, don't you?" I was frozen. What? Where in the hell had that come from? I started to protest but found that I couldn't. He filled my silence in with the understatement of the century. "Yeah. It's easy to fall for her." I sighed. Damn. There was no going back. Here goes nothing.

"Easy, but scary as hell." I admitted. He nodded.

"Come on. Let's get moving. We've got a Princess starving up in our tower to rescue."

 **Well? What do you think? Please leave review! (I live for that;) I hope you all enjoyed it and I look forward to reading your criticisms! xoxo - E**


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

 **Clarke**

I awoke with Jasper's grinning face not three inches from my own.

"Monty! She's awake!" He yelled, the moment my eyes were opened. I flinched at the noise.

"Jasper, what the hell?" I mumbled angrily as I tried to sit up. The last thing I remembered was the feeling of Bellamy's skin on mine as I checked out his hand. I could feel the blush creeping up my skin. _Woah, Clarke, get ahold of yourself._ _It's just Bellamy. You hate him. And he doesn't particularly like you either._ Another voice in my head tried to bring up the conversation we'd had a this morning before Murphy woke up and ruined everything but I shook my head in an attempt to get rid of that thought. I was _not_ doing that right now. Suddenly Monty was by my side shoving a cup of sorts with a foul smelling liquid into my face.

"Drink. It tastes like dirt but it'll be good for you."

"What are you talking about? I'm fine." I insisted, pushing the liquid as far from my nostrils as I could.

"No you're not. You need protein. You passed out and have been out for almost two hours. In case you've forgotten, that's kind of a bad thing." My head was spinning, everything seemed kind of slow, almost blurry. I blinked a few times in an attempt to focus.

"What are you talking about? No. Bellamy had bruised his hand, I was looking at it to see if there was anything I could do, and then…" I trailed off. And then what?

"And then you passed out into Bellamy's arms and then he and Murphy got into this big fight and then Monty came up here and saw that you are suffering from slow starvation and so now Wells and Bellamy and Finn and Miller are out hunting for your dinner 'cause they're all worried about you." Jasper took a big breath. "I should say Wells and Finn are worried about you. Bellamy's-"

"Yeah, I got it." I cut him off with a grumble. "I'm still not drinking Monty's gross ass tea." Jasper smirked.

"I don't blame you. But never fear! Three dashing young gentlemen and Bellamy are out fetching dinner especially for you right now!" I laughed, softly. Of course he was wrong. Bellamy was the handsomest of the lot, although he was likely out there because of pressure from the group so it was only fair to make fun of him and (were it to get back to him) deflate his ego just a touch. God knows he had more than his fair share of ego.

I felt like I was forgetting something, as if there were something I should be asking about, someone I should double check on. Was there some reason to ask about Octavia? Maybe she had been the one to convince Bell to go hunting with the others. (No Clarke…Bellamy. His name is Bellamy.) I was being ridiculous. It wasn't as thought the hunting trip was _just_ to get food for me. They'd all probably forgotten that we ran out of food for everyone and this was just a regular hunting trip. Jasper and Monty were likely just trying to cheer me up because they were worried about me. And as for Octavia, I shouldn't be worried because of course Bellamy would protect her from…oh. That's who I was forgetting.

"Where's Murphy?" I asked as casually as I could. Jasper's face actually fell. I had never understood that expression but there it was. One moment Jasper's eyes sparkled and he was grinning at his own dumb joke and the next all the muscles that had been twisting his expression into one of pure joy just released. He looked heartbroken. Why? What had happened? Was Murphy dead? I shouldn't be happy about that. Anyone dying was a bad thing. But for a moment, my heart was filled with a perverted sort of hope and my fingers shook with excitement. "Where is he Jasper? Has something happened? Where's Murphy?"

"He's outside tending to a break in the wall. He's busy, that's why we're here instead of him." He mumbled. "I'm going to head out and check on everyone, see if the hunting party is back yet."

"Jasper!" I admonished him. "You shouldn't be running around anywhere! You've been stabbed! You're barely healed." He and Monty froze, staring at me. After what felt like an eternity Monty finally spoke.

"Clarke, its been almost 5 weeks since he woke up. Jasper's been doing fine. He's even been out of camp on his own to gather fruit from that butterfly field Octavia found." Not one of those words sounded familiar to me.

"5 weeks? It hasn't been 5 weeks! We've only been down here for…" I trailed off, realizing that I didn't remember. It couldn't have been 5 weeks though, of that much I was sure. Time hadn't been moving that fast. They were staring at me as though I was crazy. "What butterfly field?" I asked, my voice quiet. Monty shot Jasper a worried look and Jasper nodded back at the unasked question, whatever it had been.

"I'm just going to go check if the hunting party is back. Clarke why don't you drink Monty's tea. I bet it doesn't taste as bad as it looks!" he said with false cheerfulness.

"Clarke, we were just exaggerating to make a point, with Jasper. I haven't actually been counting how long we've been here." Monty lied as Jasper pretended not to listen while climbing down through the hatch. "How long has it been?" I racked my brain. It had only been what? A few days? A week when Raven came down? And that was how long ago? I looked up at Monty nervously.

"I don't know."

* * *

 **Bellamy**

I was still seething from my conversation with Finn when we entered the gates. True to his word, Jasper had a fire roaring and a stake set out over the top. Wells instantly went about securing the pig over the fire and cooking it as quickly as he could. Murphy was nowhere in sight and instantly I worried he had bullied Monty and his goggled friend into letting him up to see Clarke. I hastened to the drop ship, not thinking about how it would look that I was all but running to check on Clarke. Jasper cut me off and held his hand up.

"Hang on, Blake. We need to talk."

"Is he up there?" I snarled. "I'll get him down."

"What? Oh. No. Murphy's hanging out in his tent. I checked on him a minute ago. He's snoring away in there." I calmed, resting back on my heels.

"Oh. Good. I'll just go check on Clarke then."

"You need to hear this first."

"What is it?"

"There's something wrong with her."

"No shit." My lip curled up mockingly. "Good of you to notice."

"No, worse than that. We thought maybe over the last few days she hasn't had enough to eat, that a bit of food would help, but we think this may have been going on longer." He took a deep breath before continuing. "Some of her mental capabilities seem to be slipping."

"What does that mean, goggles?" I asked impatiently.

"She can't remember how long we've been down here. She doesn't remember the butterfly field even though Octavia's taken her at least twice. She was frantically worried about Murphy as soon as she noticed he wasn't there but it took her about 10 minutes before she remembered him at all. She was worried I was up on my feet so soon after the accident and when Monty joked that it was time I got off my lazy ass she didn't seem to hear us. In fact there were several times she didn't seem to notice we were there. It was like she was awake but just stopped being aware of what was happening around her. Then Monty reminded her it had been 5 weeks since the accident and that it was a good thing I was up and about she started laughing. She kept saying that it hadn't been five weeks. That it couldn't have been five weeks. Then she started thinking about it and got all flustered. We backed off for a moment and Monty told her that he'd been exaggerating to make a point or something like that and she seemed to calm down but then he asked her how long she thought it had been and she started muttering about Raven coming down and had that been a few days or a week after we'd landed. Then she just started muttering words that made no sense until she looked up at Monty all terrified and said 'I don't know'. Bellamy, we think she's losing it." I gripped my hands into fists to stop them from shaking.

"Why? Did she eat something out in the woods? Could it be some disease or something?"

"Monty still thinks its starvation. Just that it's been happening almost since we got here."

"Would she be dead by now?" I swallowed hard at the thought. Clarke Griffin couldn't just die. She was a force of nature. She didn't die. She lived. And she saved the rest of our lives along the way.

"Monty says it's something called slow starvation. Basically they eat enough that they don't die but not much more so their body shuts down the parts that aren't immediately necessary to conserve energy. It is very a very effective trait short term but if your body is going through that long enough it can be affect your other systems and you can start getting really ill or even die."

"So if we feed her a ton," I began to suggest.

"Slowly, though. Monty says her stomach's probably shrunk and if that's the case stuffing her full will kill her faster."

"So what the hell does the boy wonder want us to do?!" I yelled, drawing the attention of several of our group.

"Chill, Blake. He says she needs protein and sugars right now. She got some of that in a tea Monty all but force fed her and-"

"Why didn't she want to drink?" I was instantly on alert. "Has her stomach shrunk that much? What if she's so filled with tea now she can't eat the meat she needs to-"

"Again, chill Blake! She didn't want to drink it 'cause it smells and tastes like piss mixed with mud." I frowned at that visual. "But what I was going to say was we just got to cut up the meat we feed her real small so her body doesn't have to do as much work digesting it and only feed her a little bit every hour." I nodded. I could do that. She would be okay. "Bellamy, Monty did joke about another possibility. And even though he was kidding it _is_ possible."

"Well, she's kind of acting like a crazy person. What makes people crazy?"

"Listening to your annoying build up instead of you just telling them what the hell is going on?" I suggested with a growl.

"Syphilis dumbass." I snorted.

"She doesn't have…" I trailed off. There had been an odd mixture of sexual partners down here and even though all the girls had had birth control devices implanted when they were children that didn't keep anyone safe from STDs. Fuck.

"Of course she could have gotten in from Murphy but if he had it first then he'd be sick by now, right?" He asked. "Although she could have gotten it from someone on the Ark."

"She's been in solitary for almost a year, Jasper."

"Oh yeah. I keep forgetting that. I just don't think of her as someone who would be in jail!"

"I suppose she could have gotten it from Finn." I grumbled angrily.

"Finn?"

"Yeah. They hooked up a while back. Right when we first landed I guess."

"Ewww." Jasper muttered. "But then Raven probably has it too."

"Shit." I exclaimed.

"What?"

"I slept with Raven." Jasper let out a shout of laughter.

"Murphy gave you syphilis!" he guffawed.

"Shut up Jordan. That's not how it works. She slept with Murphy after Finn, so _if_ she has syphilis and _if_ she got it from Murphy then I don't have it genius." She shook his head.

"I don't care if she hasn't actually slept with any of you sex crazed weirdos. I'm still gonna tell everyone Murphy gave you syphilis."

"Not if you value your head's attachment to the rest of your body you're not." I hissed. "Now can I go see her? Or is there more to this shit fest you have yet to share with me."

"I think that's it, man." I moved toward the dropship before pausing and gripping Jasper's shoulder hard. "Bring up the meat as soon as it's ready. And Jordan? If you breathe a word of the sex talk to anyone else? I will kill you." He gulped and nodded. "Good." I nearly flew up the ladder and to the top floor. Clarke looked up at me from the chair she was sitting on, a blanket falling off her shoulders and her knees up to her chin. There were dark circles under her eyes and her hair looked thinner than usual.

"Bell?" she asked blinking. My heart stuttered. Only Octavia had ever called me Bell before, if anyone else had tried they'd have ended up with a black eye, but there was something about it coming from Clarke that made me feel warm and I had to bite my lip to keep myself from smiling.

"Hey Princess." I crouched next to her and wrapped the blanket around her tightly. She was clutching a bowl of the tea Jasper must have been talking about. I wrinkled my nose. He was right. It did smell of mud and piss. "That looks disgusting. You wanna try some real food?" Her face lit up but almost as quickly as the smile appeared it was gone from her face. Conflicting emotions shot through her eyes. What the hell? It was an easy question! She was starving. Do you want food, Clarke? It was that easy. What the hell was wrong with her? She started muttering words again and Monty leaned over.

"I don't think she knows she's speaking out loud right now." He murmured. "When she gets like this she's not really aware that someone else is talking to her and then she will say something louder that sounds like what her actual answer is. I'm pretty sure she's thinking out loud right now." I frowned and strained to catch some of the words. Of the few I caught, this didn't sound good.

 _Murphy…angry…hurt Octavia…Monty and Jasper...Murphy…what if he…so hungry…_

"Clarke!" I yelled, jolting her out of her faze. "We're going to get you some food. Everyone in camp wants you to eat. Everyone." I said with a sense of finality.

"Are you sure?" She whispered. " _Everyone's_ okay with it?"

"Why wouldn't they be Clarke?" I asked. "Who has a problem with you _eating?_ "


	10. Chapter 10

**Author's Note: So sorry it's been forever - finals are here and I have no time! Enjoy:)**

 **Chapter 10**

 **Clarke**

"Who has a problem with you _eating?_ " He asked confused. No. I couldn't say anything. Monty would get me some food. I could make a plan then. Right now I was just so tired and I didn't want to say something now and regret it later.

"I'm not supposed to eat. I still have a wristband." I said, avoiding answering his question. Knowing full well he would think I was accusing him, a twinge of regret filled me but I had to push it away. I couldn't think about Bellamy right now. He was fine. The leader of the pack. He was strong. Murphy couldn't take him down. Bellamy was too clever. I had to think about what Murphy could do to Jasper and Monty. What he could do to Wells. What he could do to defenseless Charlotte. What he could do to Octavia who I knew full well wasn't about to go to Bellamy for help if it wasn't absolutely necessary. She wanted to be independent. She wouldn't let Bell save her. So right now, I had to think of my friends, not Bellamy's feelings. He'd made it perfectly clear from the beginning that we were not friends.

"You're our only healer, Clarke." Sure enough. There was hurt in his voice. He was trying to hide it but I could tell. "We aren't about to let you die." His voice grew softer as he continued. "I thought you were all getting plenty to eat on your trips into the woods. I didn't realize you were starving. I'm sorry, Clarke."

"I wasn't exactly foraging for food on all of those forest treks." I said, my eyes fluttering shut, trying to make me sleep while I tried to hint to him that Murphy was behind this. It was stupid. I shouldn't, no I couldn't tell him that this was all Murphy. But some part of me hoped he would figure it out. Some part of me hoped he would save me from this hell I was living in.

"Yeah. Okay. I got it." His voice was angry now. I didn't have the energy to figure that out.

"Bell?" I asked as I closed my eyes. "Wake me up when there's food. I'm so tired." His voice was the last thing I heard before falling asleep.

"Okay, Princess. Just sleep."

 **Bellamy**

Did she realize what she was doing? Did she realize what she was doing to _me_? In my frustration at her blaming me for her starvation I had plunked down in one of the seats still in place in the dropship. She had then sat herself down right next to me. Far, far too close to me. I could smell her from here. I could feel the heat emanating off her from here. From here I could take her in my arms and- _No. No, Blake. She isn't yours to do that to. You aren't allowed to touch her._ Then she spoke. And it got so much worse. Not only did she blame me for her current state, but when I tried to apologize, when I tried to explain that I didn't know, that I thought she was eating on all those outings Murphy took her on she…

"I wasn't exactly foraging for food on all those forest treks." I ground my teeth together, my hands clenched together in fists to avoid putting one into a wall. She and Murphy had been…intimate. So maybe Finn was lying. Maybe Murphy had been telling the truth. Maybe I was the only one Clarke hated enough that she would never consider me. The only one who wasn't remotely worthy to be with a Princess. She opened her lips to continue but I couldn't hear more of this.

"Yeah. Okay. I got it."

"Bell?" She asked. Instantly the anger was gone. Not Blake, not even Bellamy. She called me Bell. In moments when she couldn't control herself in the slightest. In the moment when she was practically sleeping on her feet (so to speak, she was seated but the idea still stood) I wasn't the asshole, I wasn't Blake, I was Bell. And if that couldn't melt my heart, then I was the heartless bastard everyone down here thought I was.

"Wake me up when there's food." Her head drifted to the side and fell onto my shoulder. I froze. Did this girl know what she was doing to me?! "I'm so tired." Her weight fell into me, and it was as though she was cuddling with me as she fell asleep. She hummed contently into my chest and I smiled.

"Okay Princess, just sleep."

"Sleep." She mumbled, her fingers gripping onto my shirt tightly, pulling me close. I closed my eyes and inhaled, wrapping my arms around her and memorizing this feeling. There was nothing like this in the world. I could almost pretend she loved me when she held me in her sleep like this. It was too good to be true. But I had this moment. And damned if I wasn't going to take it.

* * *

Minutes later found me absentmindedly stroking her hair knowing full well how inappropriate this was and yet unable to stop myself from doing it. She talked in her sleep. Thus far the sounds were random and I didn't understand a whit of it. I was, however, highly amused by it. Then came a word that I understood perfectly.

"Octavia." That was odd. "Octavia, run." And that was just unsettling. "He's going to hurt you, O. Find Bell and run." She was begging now and my heart was pounding quicker and quicker. Clarke was clearly upset, it may be a dream, but something was wrong. "So sorry." She mumbled, a single tear running down her cheek and landing on my shirt. "So sorry. Run, O. Save yourself."

"Clarke. Come on Clarke, wake up." I shook her. I had to wake her from whatever nightmare plagued her. "Clarke, it's just a dream. Come on Clarke."

"Bell." She moaned, a harrowing sound.

"Yeah, Clarke, it's me. Wake up. You're safe."

"Bell, please." She was still asleep. "I'm so sorry. Get them out. Get them all out. Don't let him hurt them."

"Clarke!" I was yelling now. "Clarke!" Still nothing I turned to the hatch. "Monty! Get your ass up here!"

"Don't let him hurt them."

"He's not going to hurt anyone, Clarke." I begged, no idea what I was promising her. "I'm not going to let him hurt you."

"I'm already dead." She whimpered with a voice that chilled my very blood. "Just save them. Please, Bell."

"Monty!" I screamed. "Jasper! O!" Anyone. For God's sake, I had no idea what I was doing. I needed help. For God's sake, someone help me.

"We're here, man, chill." Jasper said as his head popped up through the hatch. Wells is carrying a bunch of meat chunks on a stick, bite sized pieces for Her Majesty." He winked before taking in the sight before him.

"For the love of God, someone help me wake her up!" I screamed. "She wont wake up!" Instantly three men were at my side all calling her name and shaking her. "Yeah, because I didn't already try that." I snapped at them. "Come on! She's having a nightmare! Monty, don't you have something?"

"I'm working on it!" he called, that was when I realized that he was not one of the boys at my side. Finn, Wells, and Jasper surrounded Clarke, while Monty stood over a small table of herbs that Clarke was always working on with Octavia, mixing together God only knew what. I had never been particularly religious. Yeah we said prayers together on the Ark and what not, but I couldn't figure out a God who would allow a child to be born into a world who would be killed simply for being born by the rest of his so called followers, and was then forced to live under the floorboards her entire life. That wasn't the sort of world I thought a God had any part in creating. But right now, I needed anything that would help.

"Please, God." I murmured, saying the rest of my prayer to myself. "Please, please God." I reached up to where her fingers clenched my shirt and took one of her hands into mine. "Come on Clarke." Her breathing slowed and the look of anguish on her face softened. At that moment Octavia was at my side, holding up the mixture Monty had created under her nose. Suddenly, Clarke sneezed, four times and when the last one ended her eyes opened, looking around at all of us, staring at her anxiously.

"There she is." Jasper said, as if speaking to a child. "We couldn't wake you up for a minute there, Clarke. But hey. We've got food! Whose hungry?" He asked with a wink. Her eyes darted back and forth between all of us, finally landing on Octavia. She licked her lips and I felt her hand, still enclosed in mine, start to shake violently.

"Not me." Jasper laughed but I flashed a glare at him, silencing him instantly.

"I don't think she's making a joke." I hissed.

"That's to damn bad. Its a new rule." I said loudly, picking her up from where she'd squirmed onto the floor, pulling me along with her somewhere in her fit when I had been too preoccupied worrying to notice. "Healer has to eat the first meal from all of our kills in the presence of myself and at least three others. You know what? No. Not three random others. In the presence of myself, Monty, Jasper, and Octavia. Its a rule. You can't break it."

"I can do whatever the hell I want." She muttered, pulling her hand from mine. I would be lying if I thought for a moment that I didn't miss the feeling of her fingers intertwined with mine.

"No. You can't. Because if you don't eat," I looked around, at the others, begging someone to help me come up with a threat.

"If you don't eat then I'm gonna sleep with your boyfriend." Octavia finished for me. That was NOT what I had in mind.

"Why the hell would you do that? You're in love with your Grounder boyfriend." Clarke replied, refusing to look any of us in the eye, choosing instead to pull her knees to her chest, sitting in the fetal position, staring at the floor.

"Your what?" I hissed at O.

"Big picture, here!" He whispered back.

"Okay, if you don't eat, then I'm going to stab Monty."

"No you wont."

"I might actually, I'm really pissed off at him right now. And my worry for you is the only thing keeping me from assaulting him." Who the hell was my sister these days? I didn't expect a thing that came out of her mouth but it was all kind of ingenious. She was really thriving down here on Earth. "But if you don't eat, then clearly you aren't worried about your own well being so I don't have to worry about you. And if I'm not worrying about you, then I'm going to stab Monty."

"Octavia," Clarke tried to protest but O just shoved the meat in her hands and continued to speak as Clarke eyed the food up as though she was starving and it was...oh wait. That was exactly what was happening. She was starving. And someone had handed her freshly cooked food. And she was reacting exactly as you might expect, unable to tear her eyes away.

"Nope. I'm gonna stab him. Not in the neck, or the heart, or somewhere where he'll die as quickly and painlessly as is possible when you get stabbed. Nah, I'm gonna stab him in the arm, or leg or something. Just to put him in a lot of pain. And then I'll start to punch him where I've stabbed him until he passes out from the pain. And then you are going to be the only one who can heal him, 'cause he'll be unconscious but you won't be able to because you haven't eaten and will also pass out again and then Monty's gonna die all because you wouldn't take one, measly bite of-" and then Clarke took a bite. I breathed a sigh of relief and smiled at O, thanking her. Unsurprisingly, Monty was the only one not smiling at her.

"What the hell did I do to you, Octavia?" He muttered. She simply winked and gestured at Clarke. "Well remind me to never piss you off." He said.

"Noted". She responded. "Slow down, Clarke, too much at once and you'll get sick." Clarke smiled and nodded but didn't slow down at all.

"We didn't put that much on," Wells said with a shrug. "She should be fine." Everyone was grinning, relieved. But there was still something wrong. There was still something that haunted her enough to make her think she was going to die, that all her friends were in danger, that she had to beg me to save them, and that somehow, it was all her fault. And a few bites of wild boar weren't going to chase that away.

 **A/N: Thoughts? Please review! Any critiques, positive or negative are appreciated!**


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

 **Bellamy**

"Murphy." I stalked up to the man and held onto the folds of my pants to keep from taking a swing.

"What do you want, Blake? Looking for more stories about my girlfriend?"

"Yeah." I said enthusiastically. His face froze as he tried to figure out my play. "Why don't you tell me the one about why she is refusing to eat?"

"That don't got nothing to do with me."

"I didn't say it did. And yet you're awfully defensive." He smirked.

"I don't know what you're looking for me to say, Blake."

"I want you to tell me what the hell you did to her."

"Really? Because last time I tried to spill the beans on what went down, you and Spacewalker nearly took my head off."

"Cut the shit, Murphy. You've done something to her and now she's afraid to eat, afraid something's gonna happen to one of her friends. What did you do to her?"

"I don't know, man. When she and I are taking our walks she eats plenty. All of a sudden you're around and she won't? I think maybe you're looking at the wrong guy."

"Stay away from her."

"Well that doesn't sound like 'whatever the hell I want' so I'm going to have to stay no."

"Stay away from her. Touch her again, and you will regret it."

"That's my girlfriend, Bellamy. You can't just command us all, you can't just tell me not to talk to my girlfriend because you're jealous she didn't pick you. Jealous that I get to touch her, kiss her, fuck her and all you get to do, is run around fetching Clarke dinner like a little bitch." SLAM. My fist made contact with his jaw before I could think about what I was doing.

"You don't deserve to say her name. At the very least, treat her with some respect and keep her private information private." I growled before stalking off. That bastard. That low-life, piece of shit. He was doing something to her. I knew that much. And I wasn't going to let him hurt her anymore.

 **Clarke**

He had insisted on sleeping up here in the drop ship with me. My heart was pounding when he told the others. He wanted to 'watch out for me' while I was still recovering. My head was clearer than it had been in weeks but suddenly it was my heart buzzing nervously. Must have been some sort of long term effect from not getting the right nutrients. Right? I had sat next to a grinning Wells who was feeding me dinner but I couldn't take my eyes of Bellamy. He was a completely different person than the man I had met when we landed. I now watched the man who had cared solely about himself and his sister, checking to make sure that Charlotte had had enough to eat, having gone tent to tent outside in order to be sure everyone was safe. He took care of everyone. He took care of _me_. A shiver ran up my spine and instantly Bellamy's eyes shot over to me, filled with concern.

"Are you cold?" Instantly he was rushing off to fetch me a blanket. "Here." He knelt before me where I sat and wrapped me up in the orange fabric. "I'm sorry it isn't thicker. We're experimenting with turning the skins of the animals into blankets but Monty says it'll be a bit until they're ready." I shook my head.

"I'm fine, really." He frowned. "Really, Bellamy." He didn't seem convinced but he let it go. Monty and Jasper trailed off to their tent not to long afterwards. Octavia gave me a wink and loudly yawned, telling everyone just a little too loudly that she was headed to her tent. Surely Bellamy had to know that meant sneaking off to see her Grounder friend. But he didn't seem to notice. What was with him? Well I wasn't going to be the one to clue him in. One by one they disappeared, off to the spots they each had claimed as their own. Except Bellamy. He was busy creating a bed on some boxes near the hammock I had been occupying lately. Very, very near.

"It's getting colder." He commented quietly. "We need to find a way to keep warm in the winter or a lot of us are going to die. Any ideas, Princess?" I laid back and closed my eyes.

"Find a way to heat the dropship. Find a way for everyone to sleep in here." He harrumphed so I tried again. "Build cabins, with a fireplace. Like settlers used way back in the day."

"How many cabins could we reasonably assemble before winter? Even if everyone worked their asses off? Not enough."

"Ask the Grounders how they do it?" The sound of his breathing stopped and I cracked open an eye to find him glaring at me.

"Not a chance in hell."

"Not a chance in hell, what?" Finn. Finn had snuck back up here. I wonder what Raven would think of that. "I thought our motto was whatever the hell we wanted?" Great. He was trying to joke. About Bellamy. In front of Bellamy. That wasn't going to go well.

"Clarke thinks we should ask the Grounders for help."

"We need to survive the winter, Bellamy. You clearly don't have any better ideas or you wouldn't have asked the crazy girl." Simultaneously the boys responded to my statement.

"You're not crazy, Clarke." Okay. That was weird.

"Whatever. I don't see why we can't just ask Octavia's boyfriend for tips. It's not like I'm suggesting we move in with them."

"I have another idea." Finn interjected. "There are bunkers all over the place. Intentional or otherwise, but little tiny shelters buried in the ground. They'd be easier to heat than a space as big as the dropship."

"We could fit two thirds of us at most in the bunkers. Where are you suggesting everyone else can go?" Bellamy asked.

"There are cars buried everywhere. They would be easier to heat than the bunker by far and you could fit two to four people in each depending on the car."

"You want people to live in cars all winter?" Bellamy scoffed at him. Finn blushed and glanced at me out of the corner of his eyes.

"Well I wouldn't mind spending that much time in the art supply store. What about you Clarke?" I stiffened.

"Yeah. You, me, and Raven could totally fit in there." Shit. No way in hell _he_ would let me out of his site that long. "And Murphy of course."

"Nope. Nope. Not going to happen." Bellamy was shaking his head like he was a bobble-head. He and Finn were staring at each other as if they were having a conversation without saying a word. More like an argument by the looks of things. At the end, Bellamy seemingly won as Finn sighed and added.

"I mean, if we squeezed, we could fit six so long as we were allowed to go out on hunting trips regularly and didn't have to store a lot of food. And it would be good to keep the leaders in a central place so that if someone had an issue they could find you both in the same place. So Art Supply store, we've got Bellamy, Octavia 'cause he's not going to let her out of his sight, you, me, and I guess Murphy and Raven because Clarke is insisting." I narrowed my eyes.

"Do you _not_ want to live with Raven?" I asked tersely.

"Well actually," he began. Damn. I knew exactly where he was going with this.

"I'm hungry." Both their faces lit up like I had just made their day. Again. Weird. Had they always been this weird and I just hadn't noticed or was something going on?

"I'll run down and get you something!" Finn jumped up rushed for the door of the dropship. There was a moment of silence before Bellamy spoke.

"Are you going to tell me what in the hell the 'art supply store' is or what?" I could feel my cheeks flush a bit but oddly, I wasn't blushing because of Finn, I was blushing because I had to tell Bellamy about Finn. It felt oddly like, shame? No, guilt? I don't know but I felt like I had betrayed Bellamy in some way which made absolutely no sense at all.

"When we first got down here I mentioned in passing that I missed drawing and painting. Finn heard and in a day he came back with some pencils and charcoal but he wouldn't tell me where they were from. Just said he picked them up at the art supply store. Found out later it was a van buried in the ground. Not much paper to draw on but they're still easier to use than the bits and bobs I was allowed to use in solitary."

"Was that _your_ cell?" He cut in.

"What? My last day before we left I was supposed to go in and clean up a cell in solitary. There were these charcoal sketches on every surface, was that you?" I nodded slowly.

"You saw them?" Now he blushed.

"They were what made up my mind."

"What do you mean?"

"They made me shoot Jaha, to get on the Dropship, remember?" Vaguely. I remembered someone telling me that at one point (Wells? Maybe…I couldn't quite put my finger on it.) but with everything that was happening it didn't really seem to be Bellamy's defining storyline. He and Wells were just fine these days so who was I to hold a grudge when Wells wasn't? "I didn't want to. And as much as I wanted to watch out for my sister, as much as I needed to care for her, I was nervous. I didn't think I could do it. So I went to work as usual. A Janitor. But since I had trained to be a guard they knew I had been in the prison sector before and wouldn't be shocked by it in the slightest so when there was a clean up to do they sent me in. It's usually blood from a fight so I didn't know what to expect when I was sent to solitary but that certainly wasn't it. Clarke, they were incredible. And looking at them I suddenly knew that I was meant to go to Earth, that I was meant to go down, not just for Octavia, but that I had to get on that dropship. But that's not all. There was one, a girl with her father. I knew Jaha had a son. And I couldn't do that. So I shot Jaha on his right side. I was supposed to shoot through his heart but I aimed for his other side. I missed on purpose. Enough to get me on the dropship but not so bad that he'd die." He took a deep breath. "I also couldn't get rid of them. So I waxed them into the floor."

"You what?!" I exclaimed.

"I put down a layer of wax and polished the floors, it would take some serious man power to get rid of them now." I laughed. They were still there. He's made them permanent.

"Is that a Clarke laugh I hear?" Wells appeared through the hatch steaming shish kebab in hand. "I haven't heard that sound since, what? That time we convinced Kane that one of his mum's plants had started talking." I snorted.

"I still can't believe you got his mother to play along."

"It's my winning smile."

"It was your lunch for two weeks, I believe that finally convinced her." he grinned.

"Worth it. But then again, I was still eating breakfast and lunch, you on the other hand, could use some lunch." He held out the kebab. "Eat up." A few bites in and he continued to speak. "I spoke to Finn. If we're splitting up for the winter I want to live with Clarke." I rolled my eyes.

"We can't all fit in there."

"You're right." Bellamy said stiffly. "He can replace Murphy." I glanced down at the kebab. Shit. I was already pissing him off. What would he do if I wasn't around to placate him?

"No."

"Come on Clarke. He's no good for you."

"Shut up, Wells. It's my choice. I'm staying with Murphy." Bellamy suddenly stood.

"I'm going for a walk." He hastened out of the room and slammed the hatch behind him.

"My decision. If you all want to live in the Art supply store, then I can live with Murphy somewhere else."

"We've already established that you and Bellamy should be together in case people need you." Finn said. "And if you think I'm letting you out of my sight then you're crazy." Wells nodded in agreement.

"Then we need to talk to Lincoln." I insisted.

"Bellamy's not going to let us."

"I don't need Bellamy's permission." I scoffed at Finn.

"Where's Octavia? We need a plan. And right now she's the only one who isn't being overly protective about me and Murphy right now and we need to make a plan like adults to save our people."

 **Sorry this update has taken forever! It is finals week so I haven't had a ton of time to write! I will try to update again soon! Please review:) Thank you so much for sticking with me on this story! xoxo - E**


	12. Chapter 12

**Read and Review please!**

 **Clarke**

"Bell's gonna be pissed." Octavia warned for about the hundredth time.

"Oh. You're right. And now I suddenly care what Bellamy Blake has to say about our survival. Now I'm going to stop you from going to go visit your boyfriend." I glared at her. "Is that what you want?" Octavia grinned.

"I like you all feisty. I take it you're feeling better?" I grimaced and nodded. Looking back at the complete mess I had been was absolutely humiliating. It was time to come up with a plan to save my people. And to do that, we needed some intel that Earth Classes hadn't given us. Particularly when a good chunk of us had never finished school because we'd been thrown in lock up, the only exception being Bellamy. And he was being too stubborn to think clearly.

"Let's go over the plan one more time." I glanced about at our little band of renegade renegades. That's what you call a group like us, right? The 100 were already renegades, prisoners, criminals, and we'd been thrown down to Earth as a little band of renegades, testing the waters so to speak. Seeing if the others could survive down here. But this little crew, Monty, Jasper, Finn, Wells, Octavia, and I. We were rebelling against the renegades! So the renegade renegades it was. "Finn and I go out and distract the hell out of Bellamy. And everyone else, I suppose." I began.

"And you're going to do that how?" Wells asked, his eyes closed. I knew him well enough to know that he knew the plan back to front but that he was asking in the hopes that I'd changed my mind. I didn't like it either, but I was sure I could control the situation before it got out of hand and Bellamy was smart. If we were going to get him to fall for this, we were going to have to do something outrageous.

"Finn picks a fight with Murphy and I go get in the middle of it we have something that is, by all appearances, a lover's quarrel." I froze. "Raven!"

"What?" Finn asked.

"We have to warn her that this is a show. She's going to lose it otherwise."

"Oh come on. It'll be fine. I'll explain later what happened and then-"

"Men." Octavia grumbled. "Sometimes I think I preferred living alone under some floorboards than dealing with you people. You will NOT 'explain it later', okay?"

"Yeah!" I added. "You are not putting her through that emotional heartache only to tell her later it was all a game and you didn't give enough of a shit to let her in on it!" I sighed. "Back up to the first step. The first step is that I go tell Raven what's going on. When we're all clear, I give Finn the signal and that's when he goes to pick the fight with Murphy. Then I come over and get in the middle, etc. etc. We clear up to that point?" everyone nodded. "Good. Then as soon as Bellamy's attention is drawn elsewhere, Octavia, you and Wells will make your way out one of the back tunnels and Wells will stand watch for you out there and wait for you to come back. When you get to the top of the hill you will signal Wells to let him know you're not dead and then you will go find Lincoln and get the information we need. When you get back you will signal whomever is standing watch for you in the same way and that person will alert the rest of us that you are returning. We will be trading off watches in the interim as we wait for you to get back. Wells, you said Charlotte would be our runner? Let everyone know when it's time for their shift?" Wells nodded proudly. That was quite the odd friendship seeing as it had grown out of a murder attempt, but it was clear that the two of them had become quite close.

"And once I get back, then we can all meet up and make a plan." Octavia said cheerfully.

"Guys, remember, this is the last time we can all hang out until then" Monty warned us again. "The minute Bellamy finds out the Octavia is missing he's going to flip and we since he'll wage a war on the freaking Grounders if he thinks they took her against her will we are going to have to tell him we know she's safe so he's going to be watching us at all times and if we hang out together he's going to be suspicious and he will listen in."

"So remember, if there's a message you need to get across then tell Charlotte and she'll run it around for you." Wells added.

"I feel like we're forgetting something in this plan." Finn said, shaking his head nervously.

"Don't be ridiculous. It's perfect." Octavia's confidence was certainly helping me feel a lot better about the plan. "Let's do it. I've got a hot man waiting for me." I turned to Octavia and hugged her tight.

"Don't you dare get into trouble! I did not go through all of this so that my friends could be hurt." I said. "Stay safe and don't let Lincoln leave your side until you get back to the hill." She smirked and leaned in to whisper.

"Oh believe me. I'll be sticking real close to him." She giggled softly. "Don't you dare tell them Clarke Griffin but we're going to need to talk when I get back. Compare some of these boys if you know what I mean." I couldn't hold in a smile. Of course I knew what she meant. She had lived under some floorboards for 16 years, she wasn't exactly subtle.

"Be safe." I hissed, talking about more than just her journey. "Oh my gosh. They put a contraceptive device in all of us at age 10, did they give you one when they found you?!" she froze and shook her head.

"Stop whispering and lets get on with this!" Jasper exclaimed.

"Not now!" was our simultaneous reply.

"Can't you just give me yours?" she asked frantically. "Come on. I don't want to be the freak who gets pregnant because she-" I cut her off before she could go down that road.

"No, it doesn't work like that. Its embedded into the wall of my uterus."

"Oh. Yeah. I don't want that then." She wrinkled her nose in distaste. "There has to be something else I can do?!"

"Okay, well it's not like you've slept with anyone so you don't have any diseases but you need to ask him that."

"I have to ask him about the girls he's slept with before me?! Come on Clarke." She pleaded.

"He's a healer! He probably knows about these things. Ask him about sexually transmitted diseases and if the Grounders know about that or test for it. And then ask if they do anything for contraception because the only other things I can think of are old Earth birth control types and we don't exactly have condoms on hand?"

"What are condoms?!"

"Just ask him I am not having this conversation with you anymore!"

"Okay, what is going on over there?" Monty asked.

"Nothing!" we both screamed back.

"So can we get on with thi-"

"Not now!" I sighed.

"Okay. Octavia. You are about to make an adult decision. Which means that you need to first have the adult conversation and ask him about safe sex. I understand that your mother and brother probably weren't teaching you a lot about that so here's the crash course. When you have sex, you can pass along diseases. When you have sex, you can get pregnant. These things are all very dangerous especially considering the fact that we have minimal medicine to treat them. Now on the Ark, all the girls have contraceptive devices installed at a very young age so it isn't an issue. Ever. We are all screened monthly for new diseases that might form but given our limited number of partners and the use of products that prevents the passing of these diseases, most of them died off a long time ago _on the Ark_ so we never had to worry too much about that. That is probably not the same case on Earth! So you need to talk to Lincoln before you take your clothing off, do you understand me!" She signed.

"You know you are totally ruining this for me?"

"You know I may be saving you from dying, getting herpes, or having a baby?" she hugged me tight.

"Thanks Clarke. I'll see you soon, okay?" I nodded.

"I'm serious, be safe."

"Raven." I hissed. "I need you to concentrate. We need to survive the winter and to do that, we're going to have to get some help from Octavia's grounder friend. In order to do that we need to distract Bellamy."

"I still don't see why someone can't just sleep with him. When I did it he seemed pretty distracted." My jaw clenched. She had slept with Bellamy? She was so hung up on Finn, all the time and had made this big deal only to go and seduce Bellamy Blake just for fun? And she called me the whore. What the hell? I mean- no Clarke. Focus. It doesn't bother you. It _shouldn't_ bother you. Why does the idea of her sleeping with Bellamy feel like that? I don't know but right now there are bigger things to worry about.

"No one's sleeping with Bellamy."

"Are you sure? I thought he and Roma were a thing." My jaw was spasming now.

"Raven. Focus. Finn wasn't going to tell you but Octavia and I thought we'd be polite and clue you in. That's all I'm here to tell you."

"Well I want in."

"What?"

"Count me in, boss. For one you're acting like yourself these days which is saying a lot so I trust you. For another I agree. We need to get ready for the winter and Bellamy's being an ass about it. So I'm in. Besides, no one is going to believe it if I'm not involved somehow. They all know about me and Finn. It makes more sense if I join in." She had a point.

"Are you sure?"

"Hell yeah! Plus Bellamy was thinking about someone else while I was sleeping with him which pissed me off a little bit. I mean we were both using each other so it's not like I thought it was romantic or had my heart broken or something but leave a girl a little bit of her pride, am I right? So I'm a bit pissed and helping his sister sneak out to see her boyfriend will definitely help alleviate that." I smirked.

"Does it help more knowing that little Blake also plans on losing her V-card while she's out there." Raven grinned.

"Let's get this party started so that crazy girl can get some!" I motioned to Finn and looked back at Raven.

"Thanks Raven. I'm sorry, you know. I had no idea…I mean I would never have…" she nodded.

"Yeah. I know Princess. Let's focus on surviving the winter for now. We can worry about boys later, yeah?" I nodded.

 **Bellamy**

What the hell was Spacewalker doing?! Stalking up to Murphy like that wasn't going to change shit except maybe how he treated Clarke, and not in a good way I might add! Oh great. Now Murphy was standing up. And angry. And he was pushing Finn. Oh hell. Did no one have self-control around here but me? It was like living with a bunch of children! Oh wait…

"You need to back off of her." Finn was saying. "She was mine. And you stole her. What kind of guy code is that sticking to?"

"You cheated, mate. So go on like I'm the bad guy here but don't forget. You cheated on her, which meant she wasn't yours anymore and so I took her. If you cheat you're relinquishing hold on your girl. That's not my fault." Murphy smirked.

"So why don't we see what Clarke has to say. Which one of us she chooses? Yeah? Clarke! Clarke where are you? We have a dispute you need to settle now that you're feeling better!" Yeah you idiot. Like she's going to come over and-holy shit she was walking over. More than walking. The girl was half jogging over. Running when he called? You have got to be kidding me. I glanced at Octavia and she frowned at me, worried about Clarke. When the two of them had become besties was beyond me but Octavia seemed to look out for Clarke in the same way Clarke did for her. I would be lying if I said that didn't warm my heart somewhat.

"Murphy, come on." She was saying to him. "You know who I picked, I'm dating you! So just ignore him."

"Ignore me! That's your advice Clarke?" Finn ran his fingers angrily through his hair as he spoke louder and louder, drawing the attentions of everyone in the camp. "I love you Clarke Elizabeth Griffin. I love you and I never stopped loving you!"

"Be careful when he says that, Griffin." Oh shit. Now Raven was involved. Finn seemed to think the same thing as his face suddenly went white and he began looking back and forth between the girls. "He doesn't mean it. He said that to me to. All the time. We were together for _years_ on the Ark until he went and got himself locked up for that stupid illegal spacewalk. How completely inconsiderate!"

"Raven what are you-" Finn was speaking more quietly now. He seemed oddly confused.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about! What, I wasn't exciting enough for you? You had to go and waste three month's supply of oxygen because you had this idea that walking in space would be like floating? Next time, go float in a pool you complete idiot. Or better yet, just go float yourself." She turned to Clarke. "You made a good choice, with Murphy." What the hell, Raven? Don't put these ideas in her head! "He's much more your speed."

"What the hell does that mean?" Clarke asked coldly.

"Oh, only that you're a whore who doesn't care about anyone but yourself and so is your idiot boyfriend so really, you're perfect for each other." Murphy looked almost proud at the insult.

"I'm a whore? That's real rich Raven, coming from you. I didn't know you existed, Finn never mentioned you. Not once. He cheated on you. That wasn't my fault. But then again, you know all about cheating, don't you?" Where was the Princess going with this?

"What are you talking about?"

"You were still claiming you were with Finn, still claiming you loved him when you slept with Bellamy weren't you?" I could physically feel everyone's eyes rushing to look at me. I could feel my face flush. Clarke knew about that? "So I'd say it's you two cheaters who are perfect for each other!"

"You slept with Bellamy?" Finn asked Raven, angrily. He then spun around to look at me. "You slept with Raven?" Everyone was frozen now, staring at me waiting for me to respond.

"What, am I a part of this now?!" I asked panicking. "Because if I get a vote I say we all calm down and-"

"You're not in charge Blake." Murphy snarled.

"Clarke. Leave him." Finn was begging her now. "He's not good enough for you. I would do anything for you. Leave him. Run away with me. We can make it on our own I know it, let's just go, and get out of here. Just you and me. Run away with me."

"She's not going anywhere." Murphy snarled gripping her arm possessively. I stepped forward but Clarke's eyes met mine and she shook her head slightly.

"He's right. I'm dating him so you guys are going to have to deal with it. I think you should be together but that's your call so if you want to date do it and if you don't, no one's forcing you. But you should definitely work out your issues. I think was really therapeutic for all of us to talk this through. Having had this conversation will definitely help us through the winter to come, don't you guys think?" What the hell was she talking about? And why was she suddenly so freaking calm? I watched the tableau before me and my eyes widened even more as Finn and Raven were nodding, they too were suddenly calm.

"That is a great point Clarke. I'm going to go think about that over there by Wells." Raven excused herself, the oddest smile on her face, particularly given the extreme fight that had just been happening. My head was spinning. What was going on?! And if everyone was inexplicably calming down why was Murphy still gripping Clarke's arm so tightly her skin was white?

"Yes." Finn was agreeing, backing up. "I think we have definitely made some good headway on the issue. I would really like to talk about it just a bit further. With Bellamy maybe? Yes I think you and Bellamy and I should talk." Why was I a part of this nonsense?! I t was like being thrown on stage without a clue what show you were supposed to be performing in. Also the show seemed to be in a different language because none of this made sense to me.

"She's not going anywhere." Murphy growled, pulling her back to him. Clarke blinked, clearly annoyed.

"It's not like that." She grumbled. "This has nothing to do with that, we just have to talk to Bellamy."

"Why? So they can convince you to leave me?"

"Of course not." Her voice was short and terse but Murphy's was getting more and more angry and his grip on her was getting tighter and tighter. "We just need to talk to Bellamy. It's about Octavia." That caught my attention. I turned my head to find her, see how she felt about this. Huh. That's odd. I couldn't find her. She must have moved to a better vantage point. I looked back to Murphy. His eyes were wide and furious now.

"Yeah." He hissed in Clarke's ear as he pulled her up tight to his side. "It is about Octavia, remember? And all of your other little friends who've been plotting against me."

"Murphy, I swear. It's not that. Our deal still stands."

"Oh sweetheart, you make it sound so romantic." His arm snaked its way around her torso holding her tightly against himself and he gripped her earlobe with his teeth, staring directly at me the whole time. I saw red. I actually did. I could feel my nails cutting through the skin on my hand as I my hand gripped into a fist. "You're not going anywhere without me. Not ever again. No matter what any of your little boyfriends say." Clarke was frozen, stiffly, not moving.

"I swear, it's not like that. We need to talk to him about Octavia and how we all plan on surviving the coming winter. Please, Murphy all of that was an act, okay? Finn didn't mean any of it. Neither did Raven. Raven and I are good." She raised her voice, still not moving an inch. "Raven! We good?"

"We're good Clarke, Murphy put down the knife or I swear to God-"

"Knife?!" I looked down and saw it, my blood running cold. The reason Clarke was frozen, the reason everyone had stopped moving. Murphy held a knife up against Clarke's ribs.

"Finn?" Her voice was shaking. "I remembered what we were forgetting when we made our plan."


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Sorry Folks - I know this chapter isn't super long but it is jam packed full of content! I will get the next one up soon! Thanks to all for the reviews! I so appreciate them! I really love getting a feel of how my lovely readers want the story to go so if you have opinions or suggestions please leave a review or PM me! Also, I am ALWAYS trying to improve myself as a writer so please review and tell me what you think - plot, grammar, quality of prose, whatever! Positive or negative reviews are all SO welcome! Basically - PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! haha - anyway, I hope you enjoy this!**

 **xoxo - E**

* * *

 **Clarke**

"Finn?" I asked as calmly as I could. "I remembered what we were forgetting when we made our plan." Finn nodded slowly.

"Yeah. Your boyfriend is a crazy son of a-"

"Is now really the best time for that?" I hissed, cutting him off. "Murphy. I don't know what you think is happening, but I swear, this is not it."

"Come on Princess. Don't lie to me. You know how I feel about liars." I flinched, the bruise that still ached on my shoulder now feeling the sharp pain of remembering how it came to be.

" _Did you eat that?" Murphy bellowed, looking down at the remnants of something leafy that had been eaten._

" _Murphy, no. I swear! Someone else must have left it here!"_

" _Well that would be oh-so-convenient, wouldn't it?" He sneered at me. "Don't lie to me Clarke. I hate liars."_

" _Murphy, I swear, I'm telling the truth!" Before I could even finish speaking a seatbelt whipped around me and the buckle slammed into my shoulder. Murphy looked murderous holding his makeshift whip as I fell to my knees at his feet. "I swear! I didn't eat!"_

" _You better be telling the truth, Princess. I hate liars!" he spat at the ground before me and left me to nurse my own wound._

"Murphy I swear. I'll explain everything. Let's get out of here. Go somewhere, talk, just the two of us." Both Bellamy and Finn jumped forward protesting but I spoke over them. "JUST THE TWO OF US can talk. I will explain everything, Murphy. I'll tell you everything, the whole truth. And it can be just us two. That way you won't feel threatened by everyone else." The range of emotions flashing across Bellamy's face were unreadable. There were too many and they flew by too fast. One thing was certain though. Bellamy Blake was furious. Bellamy Blake was something paramount to nervous. And Bellamy Blake looked like he might just kill John Murphy. "Guys, calm down." I said to Finn and Bell. "I'm fine. Murphy isn't going to hurt me."

"Clarke, the man has a knife pressed against your ribs." I took a deep breath. I had to diffuse this situation. I forced a smile and rolled my eyes.

"So he's dramatic. Big deal. I seem to remember some drama out of the two of you not too long ago. He isn't going to hurt me." I turned my head, still staying tightly within Murphy's grasp and kissed his cheek. "Babe, you're freaking them out, do you mind? Let's go for a walk, clear your head. Then I can tell you what's going on." His grip on my arm loosened and I couldn't feel the point of the knife anymore. "Trust me." I whispered. "We're screwing over Bellamy, okay? You'll like the plan." His hand let go of me and reached down instead to claim my hand. The position looked almost romantic but I could feel the vice grip he used. I knew I was still under his thumb.

"Clarke you don't honestly think we're just going to let you wander off with the guy who just stuck a knife in your ribs, do you? Because that's the most ludicrous thing I've ever-"

"Yes. Actually I do, Bellamy. You aren't in charge of me. And down here we're allowed to do whatever the hell we want, right? Or did I miss something?"

"Clarke-" The look of pain on his face when I threw his words back into his face was immense and I held in a wince at my being the cause of it.

"Don't worry about it. Like I said, Murphy won't hurt me. We're fine." I leaned into the boy in question, fighting back a gag the whole time. "What can I say, I like a bad boy." I stared at Finn until he caught my gaze, then glanced at Charlotte. Back to Finn. Back to Charlotte. He nodded slowly, imperceptibly if one wasn't watching for it.

"Okay, Clarke." He said, cutting off whatever Bellamy had been about to say. "I guess we'll see you later."

"No." Murphy said suddenly. "It involves screwing over Bellamy, right Princess? That's what you said?" seriously Murphy. You are doing this now? "He should come. You should tell him the truth too." He plastered a disturbing grin on his face and added. "Come on Finn, Bellamy, this should be fun!" Finn was sighing and shaking his head, but begrudgingly following us and Murphy led us into the dropship but Bellamy was all too thrilled to be invited, no matter the topic. If I didn't know better, I would have said Bellamy was being protective.

Murphy sat there, hand wrapped around my wrist, watching Bellamy pace back and forth with a shit eating grin plastered so comfortably on his lips I thought his face may just stay like that forever.

"So what your telling me," Bellamy began, running fingers through his mess, curled locks, "Is that you orchestrated that whole thing so that my baby sister could sneak out to meet up with a _Grounder,_ one who I once tortured for information, which means that he now has a grudge against me and for all you know would take that out on her, or by keeping her away from me, all because you lot _think_ that he might give her _advice_ on how we might survive the winter?!" he was breathing heavily now and his eyes were wide and frightened.

"Bellamy, you need to put some of that behind you. Octavia and Lincoln are friends." I said while Finn snorted in laughter. I glared at him. Was no really the best time to give Blake the talk about how his sister was in a relationship of the romantic variety? Probably not Finn! "He wouldn't hurt her and he wouldn't make her do anything she didn't want to do. So you can stop worrying about that." I took a deep breath. I was exhausted. Only a couple days ago I had been dying of slow starvation and now the weight of the world (or at least of what was left of our hundred) was resting on my shoulders. I didn't know how much more Blake sibling drama I could handle on top of that. "You need to put aside the fact that it's your sister and let us make the smart decision. We are all going to die if we can't find a way not to freeze. Do you get that?"

"Let me make one thing very clear. None of you have siblings. It isn't like, having this best friend, or even being in a relationship, where you'd do anything for that other person. It is so much deeper, so much more complex than that. That is my _sister_. That isn't something you all understand but it…I…" He buried his face in his hands. "I will protect her until the day I die. But even then, it's more than that. I am literally, always worried about her. She lived under our floor, she doesn't understand danger in the same way you or I would. She's barely interacted with people let alone people who aren't from the Ark. This isn't safe. And you lot sent her out there."

"She's stronger than you think, she understands people, how they think, how they feel, better than you think. Maybe it's because she hadn't had much interaction with Arkians that she's able to see people for who they are, judge them appropriately." I offered quietly.

"And if she doesn't even make it to Lincoln, Clarke? What then? What happens if she runs into a two headed wolf or a freaking dragon?"

"There are no such things a-"

"Nuclear apocalypse, Finn! You don't know that!" Bellamy shouted. I had to bite my lip hard to keep from smiling.

"As amused as I am by Bellamy's inability to control even his sister and, of course, his subsequent freak out, I'm getting a bit bored with this." Murphy said, standing to his feet and pulling me with him. "Princess, let's go for a walk, get you some food, huh? Or you know," he winked but it wasn't at me, "Something else." His tone was layered with suggestive meaning and I barely held in my disgust. Bellamy's eyes flitted to my face and where, a moment ago, they had been only filled with anger, some of the concern he had shown for his sister was no directed at me.

"Yeah." I agreed, before Bellamy or Finn could do something stupid and piss Murphy off enough to hurt someone. "Let's go. Fresh air sounds great."

"So. Some little Princess found her strength again and thinks she can manipulate the entire camp? It doesn't work that way. Not with me anyway. You're my ally, Princess. You do what _I_ say and you don't go making plans on your own. We're a team, allies. If you don't act like my friend, then I won't act like yours. And the minute I don't have to be your friend is the minute I stop being nice to your disciples." I flinched.

"Murphy," I began before being silenced by his grabbing my arm so tightly I could actually feel the blood stop flowing in my arteries there.

"I'm serious, Princess. Watching them figure out something was wrong with their golden girl and that they hadn't noticed for weeks wasn't quite as amusing as I thought it was going to. And now? Now they're watching your eating habits so closely I couldn't stop you from eating if you weren't even hungry!"

"What are you saying, Murphy? What do I have to do to protect my friends now?"

"I'm bored, Princess." Suddenly his voice – and the putrid breath that accompanied it – were hot on my neck, my hair blowing gently at this sudden movement of air. "Entertain me."

"Murphy,"

"The guys all think I'm out here with you getting laid. Why shouldn't I be?" his fat fingers gripped my breast tightly and I winced at the sudden pain. "Let's see what has Finn, and Wells, and Bellamy so transfixed. Let's see what the big deal is with fucking a Princess." I withheld the urge to vomit. Murphy was about to…he wanted me to…frankly? I would have preferred the knife in my ribs than this.

* * *

 **Charlotte**

I ran as fast as I could. I had followed Clarke and listened to that creep talk for long enough. I knew what was about to happen. And there hadn't been anything I could have done about. I needed help. _Clarke_ needed help. Wells, maybe, or Finn, they probably should be my first choice. They would both care enough that they'd come running but be level headed enough that they could handle the situation in the best possible way. Not to mention, Wells was Clarke's best friend, and Finn had slept with her, they had feelings for each other, they both were pretty high in the lineup of who had claim to Clarke's best interests. They were both my friends. And neither of them would like the fact that I wasn't going to them first. But how could I? Neither of them would run as fast, neither of them would care as much, could care as much as _he_ did. If anything happened to Clarke, he wouldn't just be heartbroken, he'd be destroyed. I saw how hard he took it when she was hurting, when he thought it was his fault, (it wasn't. Couldn't any of them see how she looked to Murphy for approval before doing anything at all? Couldn't any of them see that he was controlling Clarke?) I saw how much he loved her, more than anything. He would run to her faster. He would fix this faster. And he would make sure that it never happened again. I had to find him. I had to find Bellamy.


	14. Chapter 14

**To the guest who said "** **I'm honestly kind of surprised Clarke is already so clearheaded and back to herself after suffering malnutrition for so so long." Yeah. I know. It's bad. At some point after I've finished this fic I will probably put it under construction and fix some of the massive plot holes I have created…that very much being one of them. Initially the story was meant to pick up at least a week after they got her food so I was writing with a much improved Clarke in mind, but then I changed that timeline and forgot to change Clarke back with it…oops!**

 **To everyone except the guest who commented: "Can Clarke actually get hurt?" ...Sorry.**

 **To the guest who commented: "Can Clarke actually get hurt?" You're welcome!**

 **Octavia**

"A group your size should be able to implement those strategies by the time the frost really starts to set in. The problem you will have is with food. Hunting will be harder, though still possible. It is the decreased foliage that is a problem. You mentioned that you had a lot of nuts stored and this is good. Protein is important. Get your people to dry the herbs and plants I showed you for medical uses. Clarke will know what to do with a lot of them once you give her their names which I've written down for you here. Storing meat and berries will be more difficult for you but you need to get them doing it if you plan on survival. And Octavia?" Lincoln reached out and caressed his face. "If all of this goes to shit and your people start dying, run here. I can't feed your people but I can feed you. I won't have you dying."

"But my friends, my _brother_ …" I protested knowing full well that he was right. Feeding me would already mean splitting off his rations for the winter. I couldn't ask him for more than that."

"If your brother will come alone, just the two of you, I have a friend who will help us." He nodded. "But I know him. Bellamy won't come to me."

"You would help save Bell?" I asked quietly. "After everything he's done to you?"

"He is your brother, Octavia. How could I ask you to give up your family? I love you. He is a part of you. And so I must love him for your sake." His eyes met mine, so dark I could see my reflection in them.

"There was one other thing I wanted to ask you." He nodded, waiting for me to go on. I knew I was blushing but I wasn't about to be put off. I had a mission.

"What do your people do in regards to," I swallowed thickly, clearing my throat, "Birth control?" he blanched.

"What?"

"Yeah. And STDs – diseases that you can get from-"

"I know what STDs are Octavia." He had taken a step back. Had I misread this?! "I would have thought that the Ark would have sent something down with a bunch of teenagers for this situation." He commented awkwardly.

"All the girls have…devices. Implanted in them when they turn 10 so that it isn't ever an issue and we've eradicated STDs on the Ark. You know. Small pool of people to begin with, treatment and refusal to allow procreation over generations, and diseases like that don't exist anymore in our populace."

"So you have a device then…"

"No. I don't." I swallowed. "There's this law, about procreation. One child per couple, and not even that sometimes. You have to get a permit to procreate and if something happens with a device, a malfunction or the like, any secondary child is terminated. For the good of the population." I nearly spat out the words. His brow was furrowed.

"But you have a brother." I looked at a stone near my left foot and kicked at it. "My mom and Bell's dad were married. They had him and everything was great. Bell's dad died in an accident in one of the plants when he was 3. Barely remembers the guy, wouldn't know what he looks like if mom hadn't kept photos and if he didn't look almost identical to the guy. A few years later, mom's device malfunctioned. And she got pregnant with me. I don't know who my dad is beyond some high level fling mom had done some work for who took a fancy with her. She told him she'd gotten pregnant and he paid for her to have me terminated." Lincoln instantly took my hand, anger filling his face. When she went to the doctor she broke down crying. I guess the doctor had just had a baby and couldn't bear to think of a mother having to kill her own child. She did all the charts, faked the termination and gave my mother care while she was pregnant with me. Then when I was born she gave my mom medicine that would keep me quiet so no one would find me. I never saw the outside of our unit and when inspectors would come I would have to hide under the floorboards. My mom slept with a guard who would tell her when the inspections would be. Mum and Bellamy split their rations with me and Bellamy did other kid's homework for rations which he would trade for cloth and mum would make me clothes or buy me a pair of shoes. They hid me under the floorboards. I never got all the medical treatment I needed including the implant."

"And now you want to have…you and some boy from camp are…" I furrowed my brow. Is that what he was worried about? I grinned at him as he faltered around his words. "What?" He was miserable. He was absolutely miserable at the thought of me and some other guy. Maybe I was a horrible person but that kind of made my day. I leaned forward and kissed him soundly.

"Yeah." I whispered. "Me and some guy." I wrapped my arms around his neck as he, finally reacting to what I was doing, began to kiss me back. My heart was leaping in my chest, my skin was tingling as though it was on fire. His arms wrapped around me and pulled me up to him, lifting me clear off the ground. I wrapped my legs around him and squeezed myself even closer to him. "So tell me, Lincoln. What do you do about birth control? Because I have a feeling we're going to need it before I go." He groaned and I had to bite my lip to keep from smiling as he softly kissed my neck. "Clarke said something about condoms or some shit like that…" I suggested.

"Yeah. That's an old thing. We've progressed." He said. He sighed and sat down, pulling me onto the (rather perfect) perch of his lap. "We have to have a talk about this." I nodded, silently thanking Clarke. "I have birth control that I can take that will…" he eyed me awkwardly. "Make me fire blanks." He said. I had no idea what that meant and it must have been evident in my eyes because he continued to elaborate. "It will make me temporarily infertile." Okay. Those words I understood. "We do tests for STDs and I don't have any." He glanced away from my eyes. "I haven't had…for a really long time I haven't…" he looked back to me. "It's been a while." He said quietly. I don't have any diseases. If you don't either…well if you haven't been tested then I guess we don't know and we can't…" he trailed of looking utterly dismayed.

"I had the tests when I was born." I said softly. "The doctor came in and ran a panel."

"Yes, but since then,"

"There hasn't been anyone." I said quietly. "I was locked up with my mom and brother for 16 years."

"So this would be your first…" he asked nervously. I nodded.

"Don't say it like that. I've thought about this a lot. I love you, Lincoln. And if this relationship lasts for the next 5 minutes and then you realize that you are a million times better than me and don't want anything to do with me ever again, that won't change. And I will want to remember that my first time, was with my first love."

"Octavia, are you sure? I'm not going anywhere, but my people and your people, they're trying to kill each other, O. I love you, you know that. I would do anything for you, but we might actually be separated from each other in an instant." I swung my leg over his, straddling him now and leaned in, my face inches from his. "Octavia." He whispered warningly, though I could tell by now that he was trying to convince himself more than he was, me. "My people could kill you. Your people could kill me. We don't know what tomorrow brings."

"Then you had better fuck me now, Lincoln. Or I might just kill you myself."

 **Clarke**

God. If you exist. Please. Just let me die.

 **Bellamy**

This was too much. This was all too much. Octavia was out there with that _savage_ and God only knew what was happening to her. She had lied to me, tricked me, gone out of her way to create a distraction so big she could literally run away from me. That led me to one, harrowing thought. Who had I become that she couldn't tell me anything? Who had I become where she felt she had to lie and trick me to do something as simple as ask someone for help so that all of us could survive the fast coming winter? I was out of hand. I was trying to control her. That wasn't me. I couldn't let that be me. The moment she came back (provided that the idiot Grounder proved once again that he wasn't actually going to hurt her – as loath as I was to admit it, he did seem oddly protective of her and I didn't actually believe he'd let anything harm her,) the moment she came back, I would apologize. I would listen. I would be her big brother again, not this overbearing leader. Then maybe she could help me. Maybe she could help me understand why Clarke would willingly be with a guy who held a knife to her ribs. Maybe she had some insight to why Clarke would wander off into the woods with a man who had literally just threatened to kill her. Maybe she could understand why my heart broke when I thought of Clarke, of how she would never be mine, never love me, never let me love her. Maybe Octavia could help me.

A small body slammed into me and I had to lift Charlotte off her feet to keep her from falling to the ground. "Slow down, munchkin." I warned, sharper than I meant the words to come out. I cleared my throat. "What's the rush, huh? Some nuclear fueled dragon chasing you?" I asked with a wink as I set her back down on the ground. She gripped my hand, her eyes wide and afraid.

"You have to come quick. She needs your help." Charlotte begged, tugging me after her as she took off in the direction from whence she'd come. "Please Bellamy. It's so far away. We have to run. You have to save her."

"Octavia?" I asked, panic. "Where is she? How do you know? What did the Grounders do?" Charlotte shook her head and broke into a job.

"No. Octavia's fine. She and Lincoln are…they're fine. I crept out after them until I saw her get there safe and sound and Lincoln wouldn't let anything happen to her." She spoke so quickly I thought she'd choke on her own tongue. "Bellamy, come on, run. You have to save her." We reached the edge of camp and Charlotte yanked open the gate. "It's Clarke, Bellamy. I think he's going to kill Clarke."

 **Clarke**

 _Please._ **Please.** Just let me die.

 **Raven**

At the sound of Charlotte's voice saying Clarke's name, her obsessive little harem of men came to attention. It was as though a whistle had been sounded and the hounds were being called to their master. (I think. I guess I don't really understand how dogs work and shit but I had seen a bunch of movies where someone whistled and these dogs just snapped to attention and came running and the way Wells, Finn and Bellamy all stood up straighter and snapped their gazes on the little girl really reminded me of that but I digress…) She said Clarke's name. Then it got worse. _"I think he's going to kill Clarke."_ Great. That's a great way to give a bunch of lovesick fools a heart attack. There was a pause after she spoke, as though they were all waiting for her to say 'just kidding' or 'April fools' or some shit. (I'm also not 100% on what April fools is all about. Something with lying…I don't know.) They paused. And then Bellamy took off running, Wells and Finn not too far behind. I sighed. Well I wasn't about to let the boys have all the fun. I took off after them, Monty and Jasper at my heels. I would have called out 'race you' and made this trek actually a little fun had Charlotte not just told us that Clarke was being murdered. (And, though I would never admit it, if that 12 year old girl wasn't kicking my ass…)

"Over here!" She called, running ahead of the pack, still clinging to Bellamy's hand, dragging him along. We burst into a clearing and she stopped, Wells, slammed into Bellamy's back, Finn into Wells and Monty and Jasper all but tackled me as I skidded to a halt in front of them.

"Watch it." I snarled.

"Why are we stopping?" Bellamy asked angrily.

"They were here." Charlotte said quietly. She was right here. They were right there." She pointed to the ground a few feet ahead of her. Bellamy's brow furrowed.

"Tell me everything that you saw, Charlie." Wells said, crouching beside her and taking her hand comfortingly. (That was seriously the weirdest friendship. I mean seriously, it had begun by the girl trying to kill him. Weird.)

"Clarke looked terrified as she and Murphy walked off and he was practically dragging her. I mean he was gripping her arm so tightly, just holding her tightly to her chest, dragging her. I followed them and they were, _he_ was talking. Kept saying that they were allies. And if she didn't hold up her end of the bargain he wouldn't hold up his. I didn't know what he was talking about but she looked terrified." Well that didn't sound good. Charlotte took a deep breath and continued. "He said something about how if she wasn't his friend than he wasn't hers. And if he wasn't her friend then he didn't have to be nice to all of her other friends."

"What does that mean?" Monty asked.

"It means that he's been threatening to hurt you lot if she doesn't do exactly what he says." Bellamy answered dryly. Charlotte nodded.

"She asked what she had to do to protect her friends and he said…" She trailed off.

"Come on Charlie, what did he say?" Wells prodded.

"He said she had to entertain him."

"What does that mean?!" Monty was losing it and it took everything in me not to slap him across the face. This was so not about him right now.

"He said, he said _'let's see what the big deal is with fucking a Princess'._ And then he…anyway. I ran back to get Bellamy." She glanced up at him. "He was hurting her. Really badly. And I could hear her screaming for a while. Then it just suddenly stopped, mid scream. Bell, what if she's dead? What if he killed her?" Bellamy swore and spun around, looking for something, anything. I saw his eyes. They were filled with terror, pain. If he lost her, I was fully convinced that Bellamy Blake would lose his sanity.

"Guys?" Jasper was crouched on the ground, a few feet from where Charlotte had told us she has last seen Clarke. "Is that blood?" He asked, pointing. I ran to his side. Shit. It was.

 **Clarke**

Please. Just let it be over. Just let me die. Please.

 **Octavia**

Well that was…no exactly what I had expected. It was different. It was…better. It was a hundred times better than I ever could have imagined it. I felt…happy. Content. Full (literally). At peace. In love. I rolled over and rested my head on my sleeping lover's chest. His arm lazily wrapped itself around me and I snuggled in. Bliss. _This_ is what that word meant. How wonderful. He had tasted so…mmm. I kissed his chest gently, inhaling his scent and I couldn't hold in a moan. My tongue darted out and licked him, tasting him again. His fingers wrapped in my hair and I glanced up. I had woken him. I straddled his laying form and grinned. Time for round 2.

 **REVIEW! (Also I love you. Don't forget that;)**


	15. Chapter 15

**Bellamy**

Blood. The ground was drenched in her damn blood. Not the kind of blood that came from a scratch or a cut or even from decent sized wound. The kind that drained out of a body when the lapse in skin coverage was so vast a person was about to die.

"Monty, Jasper." I ordered, my voice was low but even I could hear how much it was shaking. "Get back to camp. If Murphy shows up. Shoot first, ask questions later. In the meanwhile, get working on whatever you're doing to try and contact the Ark."

"We're not trying to-" Monty began cautiously before I cut him off.

"Don't be absurd. Of course you are. It's you guys. Get on it and get it done fast. When we find Clarke she's going to need the kind of medical knowledge that only Griffin's can give and I am guessing she'll be less than conscious." My voice broke like a pre-pubescent boy but I didn't have time or energy to be embarrassed about it. Clarke was out here somewhere with _him_. He had been forcing himself on her. Because of an issue he had with _me_. He had been torturing her. For months now, he had been blackmailing her and then he brought her out here and was torturing her and she was letting him so she could save all of us. And now she was hurt, and bleeding and maybe dead. And it was my fault. It was all my fault. I just wanted to hold her in my arms and protect her from the world and…I was going to kill him. I was actually going to kill John Murphy. Not to save someone's life. Not in self-defense. I was going to kill John Murphy because the thought of what he did to Clarke made my blood boil and made me need to make him bleed and scream and beg for forgiveness. Clarke. Oh god, Clarke. Please, please, please be alive. I need you. I need you to be alive. I need you to survive. I need you Clarke Griffin. Wells had begun giving roles to the others and I caught the gist of it without really hearing anything. Until he reiterated my command to Monty and Jasper.

"You heard Bellamy, shoot first, ask questions later."

"No." I said, cutting him off. "Don't kill him. Shoot his legs or something, take him down, capture him, whatever, but don't kill him."

"You've got to be kidding me." Finn hissed. "After what he's done to Clarke?"

"I said no." I growled at him, looking back to Jasper a moment later. "Don't kill him. He's mine."

* * *

 **Clarke**

I'd lost so much blood. I was in such pain. He had inflicted so much damage on my internal organs, this much I knew. How in the hell was I still alive? I should be dead. Why wasn't I dead? Please, can I just die?

* * *

 **Raven**

She was dead. She had to be. No way someone lost that much blood and just lived. Not to mention Creepy Charlie's little thing about her screaming and then suddenly stopping. She was dead. And Murphy had dragged her body off to hide it somewhere. And now Bellamy was going to go searching until he found it. And when he did? He was going to go insane. Like actually, kill everyone in sight, no idea who he is or what he's doing, insane. I'm about 90% sure that Clarke's dead and everyone assigned on this team with Bellamy were about to follow her. So why in the hell did I volunteer to go with him instead of with goggles and pot boy? Because Finn had. And I was a sucker for the man I loved even though it was damned obvious he was in love with Clarke too. Not like Bellamy. He wasn't about to go on a shooting spree. But it would break his stupid cheating heart. And for some reason I still wanted to protect him from crazy eyes Blake. Why? Because I was an idiot.

* * *

 **Bellamy**

"Body was dragged this way." Wells said, Finn nodding emphatically. They were both damned good at tracking and I couldn't help but be a little thankful for them. Even though I hated them both. Because maybe if I hadn't been so caught up in the jealousy and in watching those fools try to prove to Clarke their love for her (in different ways, but still), I would have noticed that something was wrong. Maybe I would have been able to see that her dating Murphy was far outside the realm of normal. Maybe I could have stopped all of this. Also they'd both kissed her and that pissed me off. Also? She'd let them into her little circle, they'd been allowed to converse with her regularly. She didn't ignore them or yell at them or avoid them at all costs like she had been me and they still noticed nothing. They could have stopped this. And if she was dead I would never forgive them. Or myself. There wasn't much of a blood trail. It was more the marks of someone being dragged away having just been lying in a pool of blood kinda thing. A bit here and there, but no particular stream. That was good. Maybe. It could also mean that she had run out of blood to leak or that her heart had stopped pumping blood and she was no longer actively bleeding. Damn.

"Can we move any faster?" I asked, growling at them.

"We want to find her just as badly as you do." Finn claimed tersely.

"Given how damn slow you're moving, I would say that's unlikely." I hissed back. Raven gripped my arm and nodded at Charlotte who had insisted on coming with us. Of course I had said no but the moment Monty and Jasper had gotten her back to camp she'd stolen a few packs of supplies and followed our trail back here. She was terrified of losing Clarke, but the girl was good in a crisis. And I was glad of the ropes and first aid supplies she had gotten, not to mention the canvas in case of acid fog or in case we had to spend the night out here.

"Bell, is she dead?" Charlotte asked anxiously. "I thought if I got you, she wouldn't die. Because the others would do everything they could to find her and save her, but you would do the impossible." My brow furrowed. Where had she come up with that? "Because you love her, right?" My stomach clenched and I found my mouth was dry. The others stared at me expectantly.

"What in the hell are you all standing around gossiping for? Huh? Move. Now." We'd walked half a mile when I felt it. An energy in the air. A presence. Someone was here. I gripped Raven's arm and put my finger to my lips. "Shhh." I said, slowly. She stopped moving and the others soon followed suit, looking at me wondering what I had heard.

"What?" Finn said after a while. I shook my head and closed my eyes.

"She's here." I said simply. The tiniest of mewling sounds reached my ear, confirming that the feeling I had gotten earlier was correct. I followed the sound through the trees and out into a clearing. The space was blocked in by the forest and a Cliffside, about twenty feet across of rocky surface that stretched on for a long ways before curving around and disappearing behind the trees. It was flat. If she were out on the clearing, I would be able to see her from here. "Search the tree line." I commanded, closing my eyes and listening again as they others ran to do my bidding. There it was again, coming from…no.

I ran to the cliffside and looked down. An out cropping on the rock about 15 feet down, maybe a bit less, was covered in grass, plants and a small tree that rooted in the spot. Also Clarke. It was covered in Clarke.

"Guys!" I screamed. "She's over here." I reached into the pack I had over my back and began fastening a harness out of the rope as quickly as I could. Tossing it to Raven I motioned to one of the larger trees, closer to the outcropping. "Tie it there, and everyone, grab a knot and be ready to pull!"

"Send me." Finn said reaching for the end of the rope. "You're a leader of the 100. They need you. If it snaps or something Clarke and I will both die. You shouldn't." I pulled it back, out of his grasp.

"What makes you think I want to live in a world where she doesn't exist?" I growled, tying myself in before there was any other arguments. I made sure the others had secure grips on the rope and started over the edge. As quickly as I could, I made my way down the ledge until I could grip onto the tree and pull myself onto the outcropping. "Clarke." I begged her name, begging her to be alive. Begging her to open her eyes. I looked over her broken body. Her leg was stretched out at an odd angle that was in no way natural. Definitely broken. There were bruises all over, I couldn't even begin to count them. And the blood. Half her face was covered in it, having been dragged through it and her hair was more red than blonde for the same reason. I searched for an exit point and I found a few but none that would have that sort of blood loss. I gingerly checked her head. No cuts. I breathed a sigh of relief. She groaned again.

"Clarke? Come on Clarke. It's Bellamy. You have to wake up. Please, please, you can't die. I need you, okay? I need you here." I buried my face in her neck. "Please, Clarke. I love you." She shifted in my arms.

"Bell?" A tiny voice whimpered. "Am I dead?"

"No!" I called out happily. "No you're not. We're going to fix you up."

"Bell it hurts so bad. Please, I just want to die." My blood ran cold and I gripped her hands.

"No. No Clarke come on, stay with me. I need you, okay? We're going to make it all better and then I'm never going to let him hurt you again. I promise. I just need you to be strong right now. You can do this. Please Clarke."

"Bell, kill me." She whimpered, her bruised hands with chunks of skin missing slowly reaching down to clutch at her stomach. "Please. Just let me die."

"You aren't bleeding that much, Clarke. I know it hurts but you're going to be okay. We can fix this." And I really believed that. Until she vomited blood all over me.

* * *

 **Monty**

A light flickered on the screen and I let out a shout of joy. A grey room with people milling about unaware of me appeared on the screen. It was the Ark. I had seen rooms like that a thousand times. Grey steel, black tech, hard lines, and cold. Just cold. It was so much better down here. There was green, and warmth, and life and curvy lines, and animals and it wasn't so lonely. It wasn't so sad.

"Hello?" I called out. "Can anyone hear me?" I tapped the mic and a man next to a computer frowned and looked around. "Hello! Please! Someone, hear me! My name is Monty Green. I am one of the 100. I'm calling to the Ark from planet Earth. I need Doctor Griffin. Please! Can anyone hear me?"

"Do you guys hear that?" The man who had paused earlier asked. "That voice? I hear a voice. I can't quite make it out." He looked around. Where is that coming from?"

"HELLO!" I screamed. "MY NAME IS MONTY GREEN. I AM CALLING TO THE ARK FROM PLANET EARTH! I AM ONE OF THE 100. I NEED DOCTOR GRIFFIN!"

"Oh my God!" A woman screamed, pointing straight at me (via what must be the monitor and video feed I had hacked into. "Get Doctor Griffin! Get the Chancellor!" Another man fiddled with a panel I couldn't quite see and looked up at me.

"Can you hear us? Try speaking normally, I think I've locked onto your signal and adjusted your volume here so we should all be able to hear you."

"Hello! I can hear you great! My name is Monty Green, I'm looking for Dr. Griffin."

"I'm here." A woman who was clearly Clarke's mother had burst into the room and rushed forward. "Where is she? Where is my daughter? Are you all alright? Why have your signals been going out?"

"People took off their wristbands. It's a long story and we've resolved the uh…" I trailed off, trying to find a way to explain the mess that was happening. "Temporary misuse of leadership. Everyone's on the same page now. We're all good. Well not all. Two died in the crash, they unbuckled their seatbelts and when we slammed through they were killed. Another two died in the acid fog but we've found a way to protect ourselves from that so that's all good! Now Clarke and Bellamy take care of all of us so we're doing pretty great. Octavia's rendezvousing – Hey Jasper! Is rendezvousing a word?"

"Dude, I don't know." My best friend said sliding into the seat beside me. "Hey! Is that Clarke's mom? Aww! Look! They do that same thing when their pissed that we're getting off topic where they wrinkle their brow!" I laughed. Sure enough. They did.

"Anyway, Octavia's rendezvousing with her Grounder boyfriend so we can get some tips about surviving the winter with what little we've got here. The heating and cooling systems in the dropship are shot to hell so we need a new plan."

"What exactly is a 'Grounder'?"

"Holy shit, Monty! Look! It's the chancellor!" Jasper exclaimed. "Dude! We've got to tell Wells his dad isn't dead! He's gonna be jacked!"

"My son is alive?!" The chancellor sighed in relief.

"Yeah, yeah. I mean this twelve year old tried to kill him because you floated her parents and locked her up when she went mental and attacked a guard even though she was only five at the time and so she was pissed and seeing him gave her nightmares but then Bellamy saved his ass and got his hand stabbed in the process but Clarke fixed him up so he's all good there! What were we talking about, Monty?"

"Wells is now best friends with the little girl who tried to kill him. No like really." I assured the Chancellor who was currently looking rather murderous. "They're tight. She runs around and spies on everyone for him and she moved into him and our tent so if she gets nightmares he can calm her down. They're pretty cute."

"What is a Grounder?" Dr. Griffin asked more tersely.

"Oh yeah!" I exclaimed. "Did you guys know that there are people down here? No really! Like a bunch of people survived and they live down here in little tribes. At first we called them all grounders but then Octavia started sort of dating one of them and we learned a lot more about what the deal is. Basically, there are these 13 tribes, right? They are all in alliance with each other and so far, they're pretty wary of us but no one is hurting each other and we're kind of in this weird sort of stalemate I guess. But those tribes make up what we call the Grounders. Then there are other types of Grounders that we then re-labeled because they aren't the same as the allied tribes. There's the Mountain Men – they're the ones who live in Mount Weather! We landed further away then we intended and that's a good thing because if we were heading in towards their mountain they'd have probably blown us up. So that's all good! Anyway, from what we can tell, they brainwash their people to believe a lot of things about the outside world but for the most part, they stay inside unless they have these HAZMAT suits on, from what Lincoln described."

"And Lincoln is…"

"Oh yeah! He's Octavia's boyfriend."

"Can we stop calling him that?" Jasper asked grumpily. "You don't know they're like this official thing. They could be like, just really curious about each other and just friends." I snorted.

"Dude. She kissed you once. After you saved her life from that creepy lake monster thing. She's not into you. Let it go." Jasper sighed and I turned back to the screen. They were utterly not enjoying our side bars. "Right. Back to the topic at hand. So their leadership is kind of crazy though. They're the ones who release the acid fog and they're the ones who try to kill and wipe out the other Grounders. Then there are the Reapers. We don't know a whole bunch about then because even talking about them is supposedly bad luck for the Grounders. If they say any of their names too much it is supposedly going to call the Reapers to them and nobody wants that because Reapers are crazy and they will kill you. And eat your body. Maybe before you're actually dead. But they will definitely drink your blood. And it takes like five to ten shots to take them out. They're like these super freaks, you know? Anyway, that's what we're dealing with down here!"

"Monty. Clarke?"

"Shit! I keep forgetting that happened." I sighed. Closing my eyes.

"Forgetting and blocking out are not the same thing." Jasper said quietly. "It's easier to talk about the Reapers killing us all than it is to talk about what he did to Clarke and how we should have seen it sooner." My hands started to shake.

"Look, Dr. Griffin." I said quietly. "The reason Bellamy isn't here – Bellamy sort of stepped up and started leading us with Clarke. He'd want to be here if we made contact with you all. Tell you what's going on. But he can't."

"Why isn't Clarke there, then?!" she asked anxiously.

"Because we don't know exactly where she is." I said quietly. "Bellamy and Wells and Finn and Raven are out looking for her."

"Raven's there? I thought her ship crashed and she died! Why don't you know where my daughter is? Has she run off?"

"Raven made it but her ship was damaged, the radio was broken and so was the transmitter." I decided that now wasn't a good time to mention that her radio was broken because Bellamy destroyed it. "And Clarke…she left with him. We all told her not to but…" I started crying and I buried my face in my hands.

"Is my daughter in some sort of danger?!" Dr. Griffin was panicked now. "I thought you just meant she hadn't made it home in time. That you'd find her and she'd be fine!"

"She's been…dating this guy." Jasper spoke for me, his voice shaking too. "We didn't get it. Murphy was a piece of work. Crazy, even. But she started spending all her time with him, ignoring all of us. Pushing us away, especially Bellamy. And…Anyway. A while ago she passed out and started kind of going a bit crazy. Monty figured out that she was really malnourished and suffering from slow starvation. There was an issue with who was getting what food so no one really paid attention when Clarke gave all her portions to Charlotte, we just thought she was being nice. That she was getting enough of the plants we were all eating, that she just didn't want any of the hunt." He sighed. "It turns out, Murphy was threatening her, well not her, but all of her friends. Threatening that he'd hurt us, that he'd hurt Octavia, that he'd hurt Fox, that he would do all kinds of awful things to us all if she didn't do exactly what he said. One of those things was to not eat. He was toying with her, all because he knew that Bellamy liked her and he really doesn't like Bellamy." Jasper took another deep breath before continuing. "Once we figured it out, Bellamy took some people on a hunt just for her, got her food, held her hand while she ate and stayed by her side to make sure no one would hurt her, and that she was eating. Of course we didn't realize…we didn't know yet that Murphy was threatening her. We just thought she wasn't taking care of herself and that she wasn't eating properly. We're all pretty hungry, down here, you know. So it's not too far a stretch to go to think that Clarke was just giving her food away and hadn't eaten properly in a while. Well this morning, Murphy got really pissed. It doesn't matter why now, just that he thought Clarke and everyone were lying to him and he was pissed off at how Bellamy cared for Clarke and really pissed at Bellamy. They were friends for a bit until Bellamy realized what a psycho Murphy was and then he kind of back away from that friendship and now Murphy wants to torture Bellamy and thinks that Clarke is the best way to do that. Well, Clarke convinced us all that it was fine. That there was nothing weird going on with Murphy and that they wanted to take a walk. Out of camp. Wells had Charlotte follow them, to make sure that nothing bad was happening and the next thing you know Charlotte comes racing in, screaming for Bellamy to come quickly and says that Murphy was…" Jasper looked at Dr. Griffin uncomfortably.

"What?" She snapped.

"That Murphy was raping Clarke and how she had heard him say all of those things, about how he hated Bellamy, how he was in charge of her and if she didn't want him to hurt her friends she had to do what he said. Everything we know about that situation, really. But that Murphy had been hurting Clarke and he was forcing himself on her and how Clarke had been screaming but while she was running back she heard her suddenly stop and she was afraid that Clarke was…" Jasper couldn't say it. So I had to.

"She was afraid that Clarke was dead." Dr. Griffin began to sink into the floor until a man beside her pulled her into his arms and held her upright. I think I recognized him. Some guy from the board. Yeah, his mom was the one who kept the tree alive!

"We followed Charlotte back and no one was there, but there was…there was a lot of blood on the ground." Jasper looked down at his hands and whispered. "There was so much blood."

"Bellamy sent us back to get this thing working once and for all, said we were going to need Dr. Griffin because Clarke wouldn't be in good shape and we would need medical advice and Clarke probably wouldn't be able to give it herself. Then he and the others went off looking for Clarke so they could bring her home to get fixed up and bury Murphy's body somewhere."

"Murphy is dead?" The Chancellor asked, confused. I looked at him with an eyebrow raised.

"After what he did to her, there's no way in hell Bellamy is just going to let him come back here alive."

"Besides," Jasper said angrily. "If by some miracle, Murphy escapes Bellamy, we're all probably going to kill him."

"You're a bunch of children!" Dr. Griffin exclaimed, crying. "You shouldn't be killing anyone!"

"Add due respect, Dr. Griffin. We stopped being children the moment you sent us to die."

* * *

 **Author's Note: Sooooooo…what did you think? Please review! I really do enjoy all reviews! I am trying to improve my writing so if you have any criticism or critique please share it with me! Trying to decide what I want to happen to Clarke from here…any thoughts? Weigh in!**

 **Also - I've been having to copy and paste in rather than upload a doc because something weird is going on with my computer so let me know if it looks like words are missing or appear to have been replaced as code as that sometimes happens with Copy Paste!**


	16. Chapter 16

**Author's Note: I am so sorry for how long you've had to wait on this chapter. It's absolutely killing me how long it took – I feel horrible! I was so blocked and the words just weren't coming and then I realized I had written a giant plot hole into the middle of this chapter and I had to do some road work on it and that took forever and we are planning a huge event at work which has been eating up my time like nothing else. (I'm not going to complain about that – they pay me to write. I'm the luckiest girl in the world!) My point is – I'm so sorry it took so long to update. You guys don't deserve that! I'll make it up to you by promising another 100 fanfic immediately after I finish this one! (I already have it plotted out so I swear it's gonna happen!) I've chatted enough: Here's the story!**

* * *

 **Bellamy**

"Clarke! Oh God, Clarke please. Please wake up. You're going to be okay. You have to be okay." I was chanting the words like a mantra over and over again. "You're going to be okay. Be okay, Clarke."

"Bell." She moaned, her fingers finding my collar and grabbing the cloth there. Her grip was weak, her motions barely there. She was white. Deadly white. She looked like a dead body. I would be convinced she was dead were it not for the sounds she was making.

"I'm here Princess. I'm not going to let anything else happen to you." I surveyed the ground around me again. I couldn't do anything to help her here. I had to get her back to camp and pray Monty had gotten the transmitter working. She was going to die. Please, God. Don't let her die." I scooped her up in my arms, careful not to jostle her leg too much.

"Blake?" Wells called out. "We're ready to pull you two up, are you ready?" I nodded for a while before I realized that they couldn't hear me.

"Yeah, but go slowly. Her leg's broken and I need to keep it away from the rocks."

"We will go at whatever damn speed we want Blake," Raven snarled. "We're pulling two human beings up a cliff!" I felt a tug on the rope and I clutched Clarke to my chest. Her arms wrapped themselves around my shoulders and her leg (the one that wasn't broken) hitched itself over my hip, clinging to me. She let out a cry that made something inside my chest swirl around anxiously.

"It's going to be okay, Clarke. We're going to get you out of here. Everything's going to be okay." I promised, whispering in her ear. The trip up was slow and jerky; with each tug came a fresh wave of tears from Clarke.

"Bell." She murmured in my ear. "Please. Kill me."

"Not a chance in hell, princess." I growled back. "We're almost to the top. Just hold on, okay?" I was crying now. I could feel the tears running down my face as I clung to Clarke's (now shaking) body. What kind of pain did a person have to be in to beg someone to kill them? We were going to save Clarke. She was _not_ going to die.

But Murphy most definitely was.

* * *

 **Abby Griffin**

What the hell kind of mess had Clarke gotten herself into? I had told her, I had told her that her penchant to put everyone else before herself was not going to help her on Earth. My hands were shaking at the thought of some vile criminal laying a finger on my daughter. Surprisingly, it wasn't Jaha who reached out comfortingly, but Marcus Kane, who had wrapped me in his arms as I began to fall at the news and held me upright. His fingers gently rubbed my arms in calming circles as he murmured comforting platitudes into my ear. It felt…oddly safe. I allowed myself to lean back into him, to feel the warmth of his body against mine, to let him make me feel like there was hope. Like there was a chance.

"Abby. It's going to be okay. She's a fighter. She's going to be fine. Wells is out looking for her. He's not about to let anything happen to her." Kane soothed, tucking a stray piece of hair behind my ear. "Can someone fetch Dr. Griffin some tea? As soon as her daughter is back she is going to have to talk someone through a medical treatment that is going to be wildly successful so she will need her strength." He called out. I couldn't help but smile a bit at that. He wasn't just saying these things. He really believed them. Jackson hurried off to fetch me something hot to drink but before he could return, a commotion on the screen drew back our attention.

"Monty!" A low voice screamed from somewhere off camera. "Tell me you have it working!" It demanded. I didn't recognize that voice, it wasn't Wells.

"You bet your ass I do!" the Asian boy called triumphantly. "We have connection to the Ark!" his face dropped a bit. "Tell me you have her." Just then a trap door sprung open and people began pouring through. Wells sprang up first clearing things out of the way of the camera and throwing what looked like an orange tarp over a table that the boy in goggles had been setting up. Then came Raven, eyes blazing with fire as she reached out and pulled up a boy I didn't recognize, the two of them carrying bags, slung over their shoulders. They instantly ran to the table and began pulling out something, not quite in the view of the camera. Then a bit of bloodied blonde hair appeared and I gasped. My daughter, slumped over someone's shoulder came into view and I cried out in shock. She was thin. Far, far too thin. She was bloodied and bruised and tiny cuts littered her skin. Her fingers were bleeding, likely from clawing at the ground while being dragged. I shuddered at the thought. Then there was her leg. Already from here I could see that it was perched out at an odd angle. The man carrying Clarke lifted her gently off his shoulder and lay her down on the table. He was tall, with dark messy hair that hung in curls around his head. Even with the poor quality of the camera and the distance at which he was standing I could see a spattering of freckles across his cheeks. The sun had really done wonders for these kids in terms of vitamin D, but they also looked kind of cute, tanned and freckled. I smiled softly.

"Which of you has the most medical or first aid experience." I asked sharply. "Of the entire camp."

"Clarke." Raven said, snorting derisively.

"Monty." The freckled man said, looking desperately at the boy who had made contact.

"Not really, first aid or anything. Just herbs. I'm pretty good with plants and herbs and food and stuff. I don't know how to deal with any of this." He gestured at her, panicking. I nodded.

"Me." Wells cut in loudly. "I'm not so great with medicines or what things are called an all, but Clarke and I spent a lot of time in the Med bay growing up and I've watched you in surgery at least a hundred times."

"Watched?" the boy beside Raven hissed. "As in, you've never done anything and now you're planning on fixing her broken leg?"

"Don't worry, okay. I'm going to talk you kids through all of this." Jackson was back, handing me a mug of tea. I brushed him aside and focused on the problem. "I need to know everyone's names. I can't tell you what to do if I keep referring to you by who you're standing next to. Wells and Raven I've got. Monty, and…" I trailed off. "Sorry kiddo, what's your name again?"

"Jasper Jordan, Dr. Griffin." The kid in goggles exclaimed excitedly, bouncing on his heels.

"I'm Finn." The boy next to Raven said, not taking his eyes off Clarke. That was odd. I had assumed he was Raven's boyfriend but the way he was looking at Clarke…well as a mother, I didn't know I felt about that.

"Bellamy." The freckled boy murmured, his eyes never leaving Clarke's face either.

"Guys!" A small blonde girl, hair in pigtail braids bounced through the door excitedly. "I got Fox's knives! You know, just in case we need to cut something or whatever. I figured it would be good to have actual knives instead of one of our makeshift ones."

"How did you manage that, Charlie?" Wells asked, beaming proudly.

"I promised we'd do her chores for a month if we could borrow them." Wells hugged the girl and laid everything out.

"Okay, Dr. Griffin. We have, a bunch of knives." He held up the leather pack, showing quite an impressive number of the sharp tools. "We have a salve that reduces swelling and stops infection."

"You do?" I asked, shocked.

"Grounders stabbed me with a spear and then doctored me up and put this stuff on me. It's made of seaweed." Jasper volunteered. "It's pretty cool."

"They stabbed you _and then_ doctored you up?" Jackson asked.

"They threw the spear at me to protect everyone from the Mountain Men attacking. I'd gone over to mount weather and if I moved any further the Mountain Men would have attacked and everyone would have died and so really-"

"Later." I interrupted before they could go off on another long winded story.

"We have sheet metal. We have an awful lot of wood which we can cut up into whatever shape or size we may need and we have tarps."

"We also have a shit ton of alcohol." Raven said, pulling several jars out of her bag. "And access to even more." She took a swig. "Whew! That's not moonshine." She said, her eyes wide. "Whiskey maybe?"

"Where in the hell did you kids get alcohol?" Kane snapped angrily.

"Art supply store." Finn said without explaining further.

"She clearly has a broken leg we're going to have to splint." Wells said. "I think if we just put some of this salve on all her cuts, those should be fine. They don't look too bad."

"Then where the hell is all of that blood coming from?" I asked. It looked as though she'd taken a bath in it.

"She's throwing it up." Bellamy said, his voice sounding hallow and anxious. "That's bad right? Worse than just a cut?" I took a deep breath.

"Yeah. That's pretty bad." I looked at Jackson, unsure of where they should start. "We have no way of finding out where the bleed is. They can't just cut her open and find it, there's no blood to give her."

"Yes there is." The little girl, (Charlie?) said softly. "Dr. Griffin, what blood type is Clarke? People outside have gotten into lines based on their blood type so they can donate blood if she needs it. And we have knives and a bunch of ball point pens from the Art Supply store that we can take apart and use the tubing from."

"Atom." Finn said suddenly. "Didn't he do drugs?"

"How does this help us?" Bellamy snapped at him angrily.

"He had that thing…that he carried around in lock up. His needle and the tubing that he could shove into any drug bag to tap in. I think he brought it down with him." Bellamy turned to Jasper.

"Run and see if he has it. Wait!" He turned back to the screen. "What blood type, Dr. Griffin."

"A negative." I said.

"Charlotte." He nodded at the little girl and she ran out of the room, presumably to get those who could give their blood. "What now?" he asked intently. I hesitated and he cursed. "Are you kidding me? We work our asses off to get her back here. To get that comm working so that you could talk us through this. So that we could save her. You're supposed to be the best healer there is. Clarke goes on and on about you and how much she's already learned from you and you don't even know how to make her better?!" I glanced around the room, waiting for Thelonious to tell him to calm down…Jaha was always the voice of reason and calm, but he wasn't there. _How odd. He must have stepped out for…I have no idea why he would have left…odd._ The boy had knelt down and was holding my daughter's hand delicately in his and glaring at me as though this entire mess was my fault. As though they hadn't been neglectful of watching out for her and seeing that some monster was blackmailing and torturing her. "It seems to me that you don't care. Do you care, Dr. Griffin?" That tone was dripping in fury. How dare he?! That was my daughter and he held no claim to her! How _dare_ he?!

"There's internal bleeding. That much is clear. But without scans and tests I don't know how to even tell you where the bleeding is and an exploratory surgery done by a bunch of children in the middle of a wrecked drop ship on earth without access to any tech or medical supplies beyond centuries old booze, a few hunting knives, sheet metal and trees, doesn't give me a lot to work with!" I snarled back. "Give me a minute to think."

"Bell." Her soft moan shook me to the core. That was her voice. I heard it, it was there. But at the same time, it wasn't her. It was weak and broken and begging and small – so many things that my daughter was not. Kane took my hand again, rubbing small circles on the back. Her eyes began flickering open as she regained consciousness. "Bell it hurts." Her voice was small and weak, like a tiny child and I could feel tears flicking across my face as I watched my child hurting without being able to go comfort her.

"I'm here, Princess." He murmured, moving closer to her, hovering over her protectively. "Tell me where it hurts." She clutched at her stomach and moaned.

"It's my stomach Bell. I can feel it. My stomach's bleeding inside." Thank God. Something. We knew something. Her words faded into sobs as she gripped Bellamy's hand tightly to her. "Make it stop, Bell."

"We're going to, Princess." What was up with _that_ nickname? I had thought she was dating someone – and the guy just let all the other guys call her 'princess'? That was weird. "Your mom's here. Monty got the comm working. She's going to tell us how to fix you." Before I could so much as speak to my daughter, she began shaking her head violently.

"No."

"Clarke,"

"Can't. Not here." She had a point. Surgery was difficult enough on a well-stocked, state of the art space craft. But on Earth? With no tech? And a bunch of teenagers doing it? It was next to impossible. But I wasn't the best doctor in centuries for nothing. I could talk them through saving her life. I could. "Bell." She whispered. "Please. I can't do this. Just kill me." Kane's grip on me tightened immensely and

"If you don't stop saying that, I'm going to slap Monty so hard,"

"Dude." Monty rolled his eyes. "What's up with the Blake's? Can't think of a good enough threat to Clarke to get her to do something for her own wellbeing so you just tell her you're going to assault me?"

"I'm also kind of pissed off at you."

"What? Why?!"

"You made out with my sister."

"No I didn't! That was Jasper!"

"Oh. Right. Clarke Elizabeth Griffin, if you don't stop asking to die, I will slap Jasper so hard, that he-" An inhuman scream cut him off and he shut his eyes, gripping her tightly. "Shhh. It's going to be okay." He looked up at me. "Tell me what to do, Dr. Griffin." I looked at Jackson, at a loss for words and ideas. That was my daughter. There was a reason we didn't operate on our family. I couldn't think clearly. I couldn't…I couldn't do this. He nodded at me and stepped up to the camera.

"Do any of you know how to sew?" He asked, his voice calm and steady. To my surprise it was Bellamy who nodded his head.

"My mother was a seamstress. Octavia's pretty good too, but she's…" He trailed of for a moment before finishing his sentence. "She's not here right now."

"Okay good. Now who has the steadiest hands right now? The more worried you are about Clarke, the less likely you'll be able to have a steady hand."

"We're all worried about Clarke, dipshit. She's our friend." Raven growled out.

"Family." Monty corrected her. "She's our family." The others all nodded in agreement and glared at us, as though this too, was somehow our fault.

"Fair enough." Jackson said without missing a beat. "Whoever I give this role to needs to have steady hands and it is probably best if this person has done some hunting or preparing of the animals since you've been there, have an idea of how much pressure you need to cut skin. That sort of thing."

"Me." Raven said, holding up her hand. "See? Steady as a rock. And you all had that wild boar I prepped with Wells. It was freaking delicious. Even eating disorder Clarke loved it. So there. I've got this." Her confidence rubbed off on the others and I could see them straightening up and, for lack of a better phrase, putting their game faces on.

"Strongest?" Jackson asked causing a few of the guys there to eye each other up. Finn and Wells especially were trying each other out for size.

"Please!" Raven scoffed. "Wells over Finn any day. I'd say Bellamy, be _lieve_ me, except he's already got a job to do, right?" She asked Jackson.

Finn looked put out at this but didn't say a word beyond looking at Raven questioningly and commenting. "So it was true?" Raven nodded but stayed silent.

"Okay." Jackson said before they could go any further. "That leg needs to be reset. Wells, you're going to be on that. I'll explain what to do as soon as Monty and Jasper have collected the supplies you'll need. As for that, Monty, Jasper, you need to go find some small but incredibly sturdy branches, they can't bend at all. They need to be cut down to the length of her ankle to about her mid-thigh. Can you do that?" Monty pulled out a bit of rope and measured out the designated area.

"Like that?" Jackson nodded and Monty cut off the length, pocketing it and motioning for Jasper to come along. "We'll get Atom and Travis to help. They're pretty good at Earth skills."

"Okay," Jackson continued. I need all of you to wash your hands in that alcohol." Once the kids had rinsed off in the stuff they turned back to the camera.

"What do I do?" Raven asked boldly, ready to begin.

"Clarke's stomach is bleeding. You are going to have to go in to fix that. You will be our cutter. Bellamy will be our sewer. And we will need a few volunteers to soak up the blood as it comes out with cloth of some sort."

"Soak up the blood with cloth?" I found my voice. "And just throw it out?!" Jackson turned to me, the very picture of calm.

"You were the one who taught me about old earth medicine. They would soak it up and throw it and give the patient someone else's blood. Those kids don't have any of the tech we do. They can't suction up the bleed, clean the blood and flow it back through with some extra plasma thrown in. We're working with what we have. And I'm going to need you to step out."

"What?!"

"We don't operate on family. We don't even go in the same room. You can't watch this. You can't be backseat directing. If we have different ideas on something, those kids aren't going to know who to listen to, they'll get flustered, and they'll make a mistake. I'm sorry, Abby. You need to step away from this."

"Jackson, I'm not going any-"

"You need someone to monitor those giving blood, yes?" Marcus Kane interrupted, putting a hand on my shoulder. Jackson nodded. "Have Abby do that. It will give her something to do, a way to help, and she won't be in your way. Make sure those kids know who to take orders from and it won't matter if she contradicts you." He looked at me. "It's better than leaving the room, right Abby?" I nodded slowly, wondering where this man had come from. He was never this nice, never this helpful, he was never…this. But he should be. This man was…a loud moan distracted me back to the screen and to my daughter.

"Raven," I said to her. "From here on out you will all be listening to Jackson. I will be instructing those giving blood and monitoring how much they're giving so they don't put out too much. My last instruction to you lot," I paused. "Don't you dare mess this up or I am flying down to Earth and murdering you all." She smiled wryly, looking just like the Raven I knew.

"Don't worry Doctor G. I think by the time you get here Bellamy will have obliterated the planet already."

* * *

 **Before you yell at how late/short this was...just remember. I've already started the next chapter and it WILL BE UP WITHIN THE WEEK! (Maybe by Monday or Tuesday...I hope.) So check back frequently and I am so sorry! Review with thoughts and comments!**

 **xoxo**


	17. Chapter 17

**Author's Note: I AM SO SORRY THAT THIS TOOK SO LONG! Some family emergencies came up that took a lot of my time and energy and work has been crazy to the point where the last thing I want to do when I come home is write MORE words…okay that's not true. If I had time of course I would keep writing. But time is not something I have. Someone get me a freaking TARDIS.**

 **I am also sorry about this chapter. I have a distinct feeling that some of you are going to hate it. But I hope you keep reading anyway! Only a few more chapters to go! (I think…actually I'm not so sure about that. It may still be a while. But we are definitely past half way by a lot!)**

 **Please let me know what you think of the chapter and brutalize me for how long it took to post and the content within in the comments!  
xoxo**

 **Raven**

I had just cut open a person. A freaking person! I had just taken one of Fox's freaking knives and sliced open Clarke freaking Griffin with Finn, Bellamy, and Wells all freaking out like little girls as a drunk off her ass Clarke winced and shit. Of course she winced, I'm LITERALLY SLICING OPEN HER BELLY! Shit. It was like they expected her to giggle and say 'that tickles'. Dumbasses. Still. I HAD CUT HER OPEN LIKE A FREAKING FISH! Who does that? Who gets to say that they sliced a girl open…not to kill her, but to save her freaking life? I was awesome. Freaking awesome. And now they were having freaking Wells "readjust" her insides. When I got on a that death craft and hurtled on fire towards the fairy tale sounding planet Earth, this was not what I had thought I would be doing. Still. It was freaking awesome.

"I don't know!" Abby's doctor friend was getting flustered. "I can't see! It's too grainy!" Abby shook her head, despondently.

"I can't tell either."

"Should I just estimate based on what you're telling me then?" Wells asked as Bellamy snarled out a feral growl.

"No you should not _just estimate_ if her _internal organs_ are in the right spot!" He growled. He had stitched up her stomach, but evidently some of her internal organs were bruised and had shifted. If Murphy hadn't been a dead man walking before, he certainly became one the moment Jackson had said that.

"What do you want me to do, Bellamy?" Wells asked. "You think I don't care? She's my best friend, has been since we were toddlers. She can't die. I won't let her die. I've lost everyone! My mother, my father, and I won't lose my sister too! I thought maybe you could understand that, having a sister and all. Not to mention, it's your fault I lost my dad." Shit. Well that got heated rather quickly. "So I'm going to do the best I can. And Jackson's going to do the best he can. And then you will do the best you can to sew her back up. Because that's all any of us can do."

"Not to be an ass here," Octavia climbed through the hatch, fire in her eyes and anger and fear written across her face. "But I _can_ do better than that." She took a deep breath. "Fox told me everything. Don't be pissed."

"What did you do?" Bellamy's voice was low as he stared at her, his eyes squinted as he read her in the way only someone whose known you your whole life can.

 **Abby Griffin**

"I _can_ do better than that." A girl burst through the door, tears streaming down her face. I froze. I knew that girl. "Fox told me everything. Don't be pissed."

"What did you do?" She shifted uneasily as she reached down the hatch to help someone through. "I brought a real doctor." A large, tattooed, black man made his way up the stairs. That was most definitely _not_ one of the 100. For starters he was at least 25 and also…had that man been on the Ark, we would have known about it. He didn't exactly…blend in. Bellamy jumped to his feet and the two men glared at each other.

"Stand aside." The stranger said in a low, rumbling voice. The two stared daggers into each other and neither moved.

"How do I know you wont hurt her to enact revenge for what I did to you."

"Because that would hurt Octavia." The man replied, calmly. "I would never hurt her. And Clarke, she was kind. She fixed me up and helped Octavia come to me. She is a friend to me. I wish her no ill will."

Finally Bellamy took a step closer to Clarke. "Can you save her?" Bellamy asked, desperation in his voice.

"Better than you can." Was the answer. Bellamy nodded curtly and stepped aside.

"Dr. Griffin. This is Lincoln. He's a healer for the Grounder people's tribe, Trikru." He nodded to the girl. "That's Octavia. My sister." He stared at the camera, as if daring anyone to say a word.

"Hello, Octavia." I said, smiling, wondering if she remembered me. She smiled shyly back and nodded, almost imperceptibly.

"Dr. Griffin, it's been a while."

"Lincoln," I said to the man, he looked startled at the screen but held my gaze and listened. "Her stomach was bleeding. We coached them through fixing it, but some of her organs have shifted and need to be put back in the right place. She needs to be closed up. And her leg is broken." My voice cracked. "Can you do that?" He thought a moment but nodded. Then he turned to Octavia and spoke in a language that made no sense to me. It was guttural and quick. The girl shook her head in response. She had understood that? Did they all speak this other language? What had been going on down there?!

"No. Bell won't let him in and we don't need him anyway. Bell and I are both excellent at sewing."

"What?" Raven asked. "What did he say?"

"He said he isn't the best at stiches and to get his friend Niko."

"What?" Bellamy began angrily? "You were just going to let Octavia run about your people, looking for this, Niko, and then what? She goes and begs some stranger who probably wants her dead or worse to come help more of us Skikru who, again, they probably want dead so that they can come here and kill all of us and then-"

"Chill, Bell. I know Niko. He's a friend." Bell sighed. "Why? Why did my little sister find it necessary to befriend every grounder she found?"

"Not Indra. Indra freaking hates me." Octavia laughed. Lincoln spoke the foreign language again and Octavia fell silent. He sat at my daughter's side and looked intently at the open hole in her abdomen. I quietly commanded the girl donating blood to switch out to the next person, and the girl, Charlotte helped them switch places and inserted the needle.

"This will hurt." Lincoln said shortly. "I must calm her now. Don't be alarmed." Before we could so much as ask what he meant, he began to sing. Slowly and quietly at first, his voice became louder and quicker, the words foreign and harsh, and yet somehow, you could tell his voice was caring and by his tone, I knew his words were kind. But they didn't drown out my daughter's screams. As drunk as they'd gotten her, having a half conscious girl chugging back a few not to mention getting the blood donors slightly intoxicated so the incoming blood source would be just as drunk, a man was moving around her internal organs. She was in immense pain. I reached out without thinking and gripped Kane's arms tightly and he wrapped me in his arms.

"She's going to be fine." He whispered in my ear. "She's strong. She'll get through this." I looked at him, tears dripping off my chin onto his dark grey shirt.

"Marcus. They're performing a highly invasive surgery without anesthetic, proper tools, or even so much as hand sanitizer on-"

"Oh my gosh!" Raven screamed excitedly. "Harper has hand sanitizer!" the girl took off running and yet that did little to assuage my fears.

"They're excited over having hand sanitizer to keep away infection from the gaping hole in my daughter's abdomen, Marcus. Her leg is still broken, she's malnourished and evidently, her doctor is from a tribe of Native People we didn't know existed who wants the lot of them dead. She's in the hands of children and she's dying. There is a very good chance that she is not going to be _fine_." I shook my head and whispered. "I sent her there. I sent her down there. What if she dies and it's all my fault?"

 **Bellamy Blake**

I never knew a sound could hurt like that. Each scream was like a knife stabbing, ripping, twisting into my flesh until I was nothing but shreds. Not really. I was fine. It was her who was bloody and broken. He fixed her and apparently O had been trying to get my attention, get me to sew her back up. But I couldn't tear myself away from her. She had been gripping onto my hand like a life vest, her fingers so tightly I later found bruises shaped like her hands. Then it got worse. Sick, broken and exhausted, Clarke had all but fallen asleep when Lincoln pulled her leg back into place. Her eyes had opened wide then, her pupils were tiny pin pricks and I could see white all the way around her irises. Her scream had been high pitched and full, a sound that made most of the others cover their ears and flinch. Drops of water had started falling on Clarke's face shortly after that and it took me a moment to realize that they were my tears. _When had I started crying?_ It wasn't long into his process of setting her leg that Clarke passed out for good. I vaguely heard the doctor mention that it had taken a while, that she should have passed out ages ago, something about a strong pain threshold. Whatever that meant. She was strong. Stronger than anybody. And self-sacrificing too, she'd go through any amount of pain for someone else. They'd been around her for her whole life. How did they not know that already? I'd known her about half an hour before I figured that out. Clarke was resting now. I think Lincoln had left. I guess I don't really know. I haven't been paying much attention. Finn is pacing around the drop ship making the most annoying noise with his tongue in his mouth. Raven said he does that when he's nervous. I suggested we cut his tongue out then. That didn't go over too well. Speaking of 'well', Wells is here too. Talking to Clarke like she can hear him. I'll tell you this, if she can hear him, she's bored out of her mind right about now.

"Would you shut up?" I finally snapped.

"Bellamy?" Octavia approached me cautiously.

"Seriously, Wells, with your stupid platitudes and reminding her of all those 'better times' and shit. Do you really think that a girl who spent a year in solitude drawing pictures of what Earth might look like wants to think about being trapped on a space ship without any hope of seeing that beautiful green? And Finn! I get it! You're nervous. Name one person here who isn't. The difference is that none of us screwed Clarke over quite literally while dating someone else who you used to claim was the love of your life. So you being a jackass and annoying the shit out of us because you finally decided to give a shit the moment you thought you might actually loose her for real isn't going to fly with me. Got it? And Charlotte-" I turned to the little girl. "You kicked ass today. Seriously. Slaying demons left and right, kiddo. You did good." She smiled up at me and nestled herself up into my side.

"Is Clarke going to be okay?" She asked, for the first time today sounding like the scared child that she was.

"Have you ever known Clarke not to fight tooth and nail? She's strong, Charlotte. She's gonna be fine. It's your buddy Wells I'm worried about. All those boring stories. Kid's got no imagination. Maybe you could help him out. Why don't you tell Clarke a story, huh?" she smiled and scooted over, smirking at Wells as he ruffled her hair affectionately.

"He's right, you know." She told him. "Nobody cares about a soccer game that happened a few centuries ago that you sometimes watched on TV."

"Fine. Like he said. Tell her a story." Wells pulled Charlotte into his lap and held her comfortingly as the blonde began to regale Clarke with a story of King Arthur and his knights.

"Abby." The monitor was talking again. A deep low voice that was oddly familiar and sent a chill down my spine. "Abby I figured it out. I figured out how we can all get to Earth."

"But the drop ships…there aren't enough."

"Who needs drop ships when we have an entire space ship right here? Abby we're going to land the Ark. We're taking her home and we are going to see our children again."

"Speaking of..."Abby said. I turned around in time to see a man I thought dead gasp at the sight of his son.

"Wells." He said happily. Wells stood up, Charlotte sliding off his lap just in time. It was him. It was the Chancellor. He was alive.

"Dad?" He whispered. "Dad I thought you were…" he looked at me and I shrugged.

"I tried to shoot where they could save him but I didn't know…I didn't want to give you false hope in case…"

"Dad!" he called out, rushing to the monitor screen.

"Wells. That man. He's the one who-"

"Shot you? Yeah. But it wasn't his fault. He was blackmailed into it."

"Sir, I'm incredibly sorry. I tried to shoot somewhere they could fix but he was going to kill my sister and he said he'd leave her be and let me go with her to Earth if I killed you and-"

"Your sister?!" he asked, shocked. "What are you talking about? Who blackmailed you?"

"It was-"

"Bellamy no." Wells interrupted me. "Dad, we'll only tell you who ordered him to kill you if you pardon Bellamy."

"What?!" The Chancellor and I asked simultaneously.

"It was Clarke's idea actually." Wells admitted. "A few days ago. She said if we did make contact with the Ark we'd need some way to get them to pardon you or we'd have to move the 100 out before the Ark touched down here so they couldn't find you. What? Are you surprised I supported that?"

"I shot your dad, Wells, so yeah. Kind of."

"Like you said. You were blackmailed. Anyone can see how much you love Octavia and what you'd do for her. And you said so yourself, you tried to shoot without killing him. Besides, without you and Clarke, most of us would be dead." He bit his lip and glanced at Finn. "And as much as I'm about to piss off a few people here…well, the minute you have to leave, we're probably going to lose Clarke. And she's _my_ sister. I'm not about to let that happen." He turned back to the monitor. "So dad, you gonna pardon my man Bellamy? Or are we evacuating the 100 and never seeing each other again?" Jaha was frowning and I couldn't read his expression. I had shot him. He wasn't about to just let me go.

"I, Chancellor Jaha, do hereby decree that Bellamy…what's your last name?"

"Blake."

"That Bellamy Blake is pardoned for any and all crimes he has committed." I inhaled sharply. I was pardoned. I was free. I could stay here with my sister and with Clarke and-

"Bell." A moan of pain interrupted my excitement and in a moment I was back at Clarke's side.

"What's wrong, Princess? What hurts?"

"Bell I can't do it."

"Yes you can." I said finally. "You keep fighting. We need you here, okay? No giving up."

"I'm so sorry, Bell. For all of this. It's my fault." She said, her voice rampant with exhaustion. Tears were running down my cheeks again and I gripped her hand. "I can't do this Bell. I'm so sorry. You take care of them."

"No. No. You can't give up. Please, princess. Please. We need you! Okay? We need you here so you have to fight." Her eyes were flickering shut and her grip on my hands was loosening.

"Clarke?" her mother's voice rang out behind me. "Oh god, baby!" My head was shaking and my hands, quivering. In anger? Sadness? Fear? I didn't know and it didn't matter. Too many emotions were rushing through me as Clarke prepared to give up,

"They don't need me." She whispered, her voice cracking. "They have you." Her eyes shut and her hands were no longer clinging to mine at all. I held on all the tighter for the loss of her.

"Please, Clarke. They may not need you," I whispered, one hand still holding her now limp fingers in mine, the other cupping her face. "But I do. I need you Clarke." I closed my eyes and tried to feel her heart beating through her skin to no avail. "Please, Clarke." I begged one last time, leaning my face down next to hers, whispering words meant only for her the moment before our lips touched. "I love you."

 **Author's Note: It's not over yet…**


	18. Chapter 18

**Author's Note: Thank you all so much for all the feedback! I so appreciate reviews – not only are they great motivators to write, but it also really helps me improve my writing and clarify anything confusing in the story line. It also helps me gage what you are enjoying about the piece so I can bring out qualities like that more so in the future.**

 **I hope you enjoy!**

* * *

 **End of Chapter 17:**

"They don't need me." She whispered, her voice cracking. "They have you." Her eyes shut and her hands were no longer clinging to mine at all. I held on all the tighter for the loss of her.

"Please, Clarke. They may not need you," I whispered, one hand still holding her now limp fingers in mine, the other cupping her face. "But I do. I need you Clarke." I closed my eyes and tried to feel her heart beating through her skin to no avail. "Please, Clarke." I begged one last time, leaning my face down next to hers, whispering words meant only for her the moment before our lips touched. "I love you."

* * *

 **Chapter 18**

 **Octavia**

"Oh my gosh. Will you people find your freaking chill? She's drunk off her ass and in significant pain to boot. She's delirious. And unconscious. She's not dead! Ugh. Teenagers. So melo-freaking-dramatic." The usually calm and collected Jackson was rolling his eyes at the apparent humor in the situation at hand. Between Bellamy's dramatic confession of love and Dr. Griffin's tears, he had clearly had enough.

"I can't feel her heartbeat." Bellamy hissed angrily at the camera, his eyes ablaze with a fire so strong I thought we'd all burn.

"That's because you're holding her fingertips, dumbass. You can't feel a heartbeat in someone's fingertips very well. Look at her chest. She's breathing. Normally." We all looked to Clarke and noticed that he was right. She was breathing. As he said, normally. In fact, now that she was unconscious, her face didn't hold the same pain it had when she was awake and she looked sort of…peaceful.

"I just cried." Raven grumbled angrily. "Real freaking tears and she's not even dead."

"I'm sorry," Finn responded tersely. "Did you _want_ her to be dead?"

"Of course I didn't want her to be dead! I'm not a freaking monster! Besides, I _like_ Clarke. The only reason we didn't get along is because of _you_. So next time, save the judgement and _keep it in your freaking pants!_ "

"Prop her head up and get her a blanket." Jackson continued speaking, without a moment's address to the conversation that was happening in the wake of his announcement of Clarke's life/death status. "I assume that it is cold at night there? Well by the clock on your screen and the dimness it looks like it's almost nightfall. So cover her up, and get a few people to take shifts watching her so they can get her water or food if she needs it at night. She's going to hurt a whole bunch tomorrow too. For a while actually. But apparently, we're landing the Ark so we'll be around to help you as much as we can!" A sudden burst of laughter rang out in the otherwise silent room. I turned to see Jasper and Monty doubled over, letting out gales of laughter.

"It's…not…funny!" Monty burst out between episodes. "But…" He was overtaken for a moment and Jasper continued for him.

"But Bellamy…he was crying and he…holy hell he said he loved her and kissed her like…"

"Like one of those princes in fairy tales!" Monty burst out, a tear squeezing out of one eye. "Lie true love's kiss! And she…"

"We thought she was dead and he kissed her and now he's alive! It's like a freaking fairy tale!"

"I'm glad you two find this situation so humorous." Finn growled.

"Oh, like you didn't know Bellamy loved her?" Raven snorted. " _Charlotte_ knew Bellamy loved her. Everyone but freaking Clarke and Bellamy knew that Bellamy loved her. How blind are you?!"

The squabbling went on and I felt a bubble of my own laughter welling in my throat. I turned to Lincoln and crashed into his arms.

"I'm so happy." I whispered into his skin. "She's going to live. We know the truth now. We can keep her safe now. You saved her and Bell admitted his feelings and she's going to be _fine._ " I sighed in happiness. "I love you, and everything is going to be fine." His fingers found my chin and tilted my head up towards him.

"I love you, too. And yes. I promise you. Everything is going to be fine."

* * *

Alas, if only they were right.

* * *

 **Abby Griffin**

I was vaguely aware of the fact that I was wrapped up in Marcus Kane's arms. That alone would have been enough to rouse me on a normal day, get me jumping into action (and very likely jumping up due to the pure shock of the moment) but today was different. Today I was exhausted and a rush of emotions that I had never felt before were running through me. Amongst those one would expect to feel after seeing your daughter for the first time in months, realizing that she had sacrificed herself to a lunatic (one whom you had put her on a dropship with) in order to save her friends, friends consisted entirely of children who had broken the law, and then had to watch, helplessly, as those same children and an intimidating man you'd never seen before who in fact proved that there was life on Earth after all, a _Grounder_ they called him, came in and performed the surgery to sew up her stomach which had been leaking acid all over the rest of her internal organs, (a man, one might add, who possessed tattoos on his chest, his back, and even the top of his head, who barely spoke your language and instead communicated in guttural noises to a member of the 100 who inexplicably spoke the Grounder language too,) among all of those emotions, were a few I didn't expect to feel today.

I had seen my daughter, splayed open, being cut with a hunting knife as she lay on the floor of a drop ship, and a friend of hers poured moonshine down her throat as the only available pain management. Perhaps it was because I was a doctor floating about in outer space, used to using whatever I had at the time to make similar cuts, but I was better prepared to handle that visual than I was to hear some boy (who looked like no good) cry over her lifeless form and tell her he loved her. As if someone could fall in love that fast! I had a better handle on her begging to die – I had heard patients scream much of the same on more occasions than I could count – than I had on the way she and Bellamy Blake stared at each other, sharing one another's pain and having eyes for no one but each other.

I had a better handle on learning about Murphy – again, why wouldn't I? It was Clarke. If someone had asked me, your daughter has the chance to save a bunch of people from getting hurt by dating and putting herself under the complete control of a psychopath who she knows will hurt her, will she do it? The answer 'yes' would come to my lips at the same time as the internal curse that she was just like her father in that regard ran through my head. – I could understand her, I did understand her better than anyone else so of course that was what she did. I had a handle on her 'dating' a psychopath. I didn't have a handle on the feeling of safety and home that I felt in Kane's arms right now that I hadn't felt since my husband told me about the Ark's problems. I really, _really_ didn't have a handle on that.

"You need your sleep, Abby." Kane murmured kindly in my ear. "It's dark down there. We won't see a thing on that feed until the sun rises." I nodded.

"Today was…" I felt his grip on my arm tighten slightly.

"I know. I can't imagine what you are feeling right now. I don't have a child, but I understand how hard that must have been to watch them cut her open like that, to watch her be in so much pain,"

"To watch a glimpse into her life." I added.

"What do you mean?" I took a deep breath and paused before answering him, preparing my thoughts.

"I just keep thinking about what it was like, years ago. She and Wells would come home from school and tell us all about the day, who they spoke to, what jokes their friends made, what they learned in school. I knew everything about her life. Then she got locked up and I was pulled away. She was in maximum security so I couldn't even see her, I just got a few, heavily censored letters from her each month. And then I put her on a dropship with a bunch of felons and sent her hurtling down to Earth. I don't know what I expected." I laughed. "For them to be in Mount Weather, for one, for them to have food, shelter, to be…I don't know friends."

"I think it was pretty clear that those kids have gotten close."

"It's stupid of me, but I've been picturing it like it was, back in the day. She and Wells, going around to all of these kids who in my head, were the type of friends she had before. Not kids who stole drugs, or did illegal space walks, or who would _beat_ her like that. But now I have this little glimpse and I see that she that it isn't this little Garden of Eden down there, you know? It's this dangerous place and she's surrounded by dangerous people who do things like… _shoot_ Chancellor Jaha and-"

"So that's what this is about." Kane said, fingers stroking my hair. It was…oddly nice. So I didn't stop him. For now at least. I could just pretend I didn't notice.

"It's about Bellamy Blake." We sat in silence for a while as I tried to organize my head again.

"Did you see him, Kane?" I asked. "He was crying. _Hard_. And the way he looked at her, the way _she_ looked at _him_. And how he said he loved her, how he kissed her. Then there's the others." I realized I wasn't even speaking in complete sentences but it seemed to make sense to him and I wasn't quite sure how to get my thoughts out any other way. "They all kept making these jokes about how Bellamy was going to kill Murphy, how he would lose it if Clarke dies, how he would go crazy and kill everyone without her. And then I realized…I didn't think they were joking. I think they were utterly serious. That Bellamy was completely dependent on her, that he loved her so much he couldn't bear being human if he didn't have her in his life." I shook my head. "I don't understand it Kane, I don't…I can't wrap my head around it as a human being let alone as her mother."

"Perhaps one day you will love someone so much that their happiness means everything to you. Perhaps one day you will be such a part of someone, and they of you, that losing them would be equivalent to losing the right half of your body. Someday. But for now, you haven't." Kane said softly. "For now, all you can do is accept that her love is different than yours, that you _don't_ understand it, and be her mother. I'm sure you know better than anyone how hard her recovery is going to be from this." I shuddered. "Luckily, she won't be alone. She has friends, a family down there who love her. And she has you, up here. And you heard Jaha. We're coming to them. We are landing the Ark. We are bringing you to her."

 **Clarke**

 _I love you, Clarke._ His voice was drifting in and out of my ear and I smiled at the boy in my dream.

 _Who are you?_ I asked the boy. He laughed and his features started to shift, to age. Suddenly I knew exactly who it was. _Daddy?_ I whispered, afraid I would wake myself up if I spoke to loudly.

 _Clarke, you've been so strong, so good. I'm so proud of you, baby._

 _Daddy!_ I took a step towards him, wanting to leap into his arms, but I noticed that with every movement towards him, he moved away. _Daddy? Let me come with you!_ I didn't know how I knew it, but I knew it was him, keeping me from following him. _Daddy, I want to come with you!_

 _No, baby. Not yet. You need to stay there._

 _Why? I want to be with you!_

 _One day, darling Clarke. But not today._

 _Daddy I'm so tired!_ I whined. _Please. I just want this to be over._

 _Clarke Elizabeth Griffin, did I raise a girl who gives up? Or did I raise a fighter?_ I paused.

 _A fighter daddy._

 _Damn right. I raised a fighter. Clarke this isn't your time. You need to fight, okay? Fight harder than you've ever fought before._

"Please, Clarke," That was a different voice. Another voice I knew so well. Another voice that made my heart skip a beat and made my head spin. "I love you." It said, sending a shiver down my spine.

 _Bellamy._ I whispered. My father nodded.

 _Yes. Him. That's another reason you need to go back. You are so young, you have barely begun to live yet. I want you to live your life, to love and to be loved._

 _Do you mean with Bellamy, daddy?_ He shrugged.

 _Perhaps. Or perhaps not. It is your choice. But I can tell you this, if that is the path you choose, you will never be without love._ I nodded. I think I knew that, somehow.

 _What do you think of him?_ I asked shyly. My dad smirked.

 _I think he's too damned good looking for his own good. It does no one any favors to look better than their father-in-law._

 _Dad!_ I admonished. He shook his head. His voice was getting fainter and fainter but I could hear Bellamy's more clearly than before. _Dad I don't want to go, yet._ I said, nervously.

 _I know. But its time. Go back. I'll just wait for you here. I'll watch over you, and wait until it is your time. Then we can go home together._ I nodded slowly and closed my eyes, knowing that when I opened them again, he wouldn't be there anymore.

 _I miss you daddy. Every day. I miss you. And I love you._

 _._

 _._

 _._

 _Love you more, kiddo._

 **Murphy**

Everything ached. My legs, my chest, my _throat_ …ugh. What I wouldn't give for some tea right now. The only water I was coming across was dirty and smelled foul but after two days of dehydration, I wasn't too picky. My arms and legs, sore from exertion more than anything, were also covered in scratches from the trees and bushes and shit. Sure, on the Ark they would float you, but at least when you ran away from the guard there the floor and walls didn't try to slow you down or cut you up like paper snowflake.

I had crossed a line. I knew I had. But I had been so pissed. I had just wanted Bellamy to feel how I felt. I just wanted him to understand what it was like to lose everything, knowing that there had been something you could have done to stop it, but you hadn't. That you had let nature run its course so to speak. I watched as my dad beat the shit out of my mom. I watched how happy it made him. How peaceful he seemed afterwards. Then I found out that my mom had had a friend, and that he had ruined my dad's career based on inside knowledge that he had gotten from my mom. That _my dad_ had been about to run for freaking Chancellor when he had been ruined, and sent to be a janitor in the freaking engines instead. My dad didn't blame my mom for his ruination (okay, maybe a little bit) but he knew that her friend, even though he was married too, loved my mom. And my dad knew that hurting her, hurt him. He was demented, but kind of smart that way.

Anyway, when freaking Bellamy ruined me I guess I snapped a bit. I saw how my dad must have felt and it wasn't like I had any great love for the woman who held Blake's heart. So what the hell. I guess we're all born to follow in our parent's food steps, right? So I just did it. But the more and more pissed I got at Bellamy, the more and more I started to really hate Clarke. She reminded me too much of my mom, cowering beneath my dad's fists. Same, begging eyes, same defiant look. I had to break her. I had to make her give in. If she would just give in, she wouldn't look like mom. So I kept hitting her. Until she passed out. Even hit her leg with a fallen branch a few times, since my hands were getting sore. Then she stopped screaming, stopped moving at all and I paused. That's when it hit me, what I'd just done. I think I'd killed Clarke Griffin. I had become my dad, really and truly then, and I killed someone…well someone else.

My feet fell out from underneath me and I groaned as I struggled to get up. No. I couldn't stop now. I couldn't just wait here, wait for Bellamy to find her, to find out what I did, to come after me, to light up the whole goddamned planet if that's what it took to kill me. I had to run. I had to find protection. I needed someone who could protect me, even against the wrath of Bellamy Blake after I'd killed the woman he loved. A large stick was protruding from my calf. Huh. When had that happened? I reached to pull it out but only ended up moving it half a millimeter and howling in pain, instead.

"That hurt, kid?" if I could have leapt to my feet and ran I would have. I looked up and caught sight of a man in what appeared to be an old time-y space suit staring down at me. "I'm not going to hurt you so you can stop freaking out." He said. I eyed him warily. At the least, he'd probably treat me better than Blake. So I stayed put. "We've been watching you lot, and I must say…I'm very intrigued."

"What do you mean 'you've been watching us'?"

"We have drones. Small ones. The kind you wouldn't notice if you weren't looking for them. Then you lot came hurtling to our planet and we had to see if you were a threat to us or not."

"And are we?"

"You are children. You pose no threat."

"What? Because we're all docile and shit?" he scoffed at that.

"Because you think, like children. Your people are particularly…predictable. None of you are terribly good at planning for a fight…none of them except you of course. You planned quite the fight, didn't you?"

"I didn't plan it really. It just…"

"Was unpredictable. I find you fascinating John Murphy."

"How do you know my name?" He didn't answer, choosing instead to hold out his hand to help me up.

"I can get you back to my people. We live inside Mount Weather. We can fix you up, offer you protection."

"Protection for my people?" I asked, not really giving a shit if they were protected or not. The man laughed.

"Don't be absurd. We want nothing of their friendship. What we want from them doesn't require…their compliance, shall I say? You however, you I can use. To help me plan an attack on your so called people. You know them, how they think, how they'll react. And, to be perfectly honest…I like you. I like your style and you remind me very much of me as a young person. Come with me. Be one of us. And you will help me get what I need from your people."

"What do I get out of this?" he laughed again.

"Besides much needed medical care, a group of people who will love and accept you as their own, our militant protection, food and a roof over your head?" He smiled. "I will help you destroy the 100."

* * *

 **A/N: Please review! xoxo - E**


	19. Chapter 19

**Author's Note: Please don't hate me. I know it's been an age. I'm a bit blocked. I'm working on it I swear. I love you all! It really has been rereading your incredible reviews that has motivated me to keep going with this fic. All of your support really means the WORLD to me. I love you all! Hope you like this chapter!**

 **Xoxo – E**

* * *

 **Bellamy**

"Dad?" A soft voice was asking, urging me from my sleep. Sleep! No! I wasn't supposed to have fallen asleep! I was staying up, watching over Clarke! Slowly waking, I pulled my head up off the makeshift table Clarke was lying on. I had been kneeling by her side when I feel asleep, I must have rested my eyes for a moment too long. I shook my head quickly, attempting something to try and wake myself up quickly. Looking around anxiously, I tried to find the source of the noise. Charlotte was the most likely to be calling for her dad…actually no. That wasn't true. She'd been without her father for the longest of anyone, and I really couldn't blame her for her age anymore, she'd more than proven herself. Wells? He had just found out that his father was still alive, (thank God) and could very well be dreaming of him. I didn't know about anyone else, but I suppose it really could have been anyone.

As I looked around, my brow furrowed. There was no one here. No one could have said that. I must have been dreaming. The others had all ended back in their own bunks for the night. I vaguely remembered sending everyone to sleep, saying I'd be up anyway so _they_ might as well get their sleep, and that I'd let them know if anything changed. But wait…no. Finn had insisted he was going to stay up too. Where was he?

Whatever. I was glad he wasn't here. Just me and Clarke. She'd wake up and chose someone else and we'd go our separate ways, but for now, it was just the two of us. And I could pretend that I was waiting for the girl I loved to wake up, and that she loved me to and that when she did wake up I could kiss her, and take care of her, and protect her from anything that might try to hurt her. I glanced at the makeshift cast Lincoln had put on her leg. I winced when I thought about how much pressure someone had to put on a person's leg to break it with their bare hands. The pain she was in must be excruciating. Then of course, he ripped open her stomach. Kicked her so hard (we're guessing it was from kicking due to the shoe prints on her skin) that her inner organs burst open. I ground my teeth and clenched my fists. As soon as Clarke was well again, I was going to find that son of a bitch and I was going to castrate him. And then do that thing that that pirate guy talked about in that old Earth movie mom and Octavia loved so much. What was it called? Oh yeah. To the Pain. For a movie called 'Princess Bride', it actually had some pretty good ideas involving torture. I shifted my weight, and ran my fingers over her brow. She was hot, but less so than she'd been when we were hacking her up and sewing the pieces back together, so I supposed that was good. Lincoln and Octavia were going to go fetch some herbs that were supposedly going to bring down her fever and fight infection.

Well she'd be all excited about that. As soon as she was well again, she'd be wanting to go with them, learning the herbs we didn't know about on the Ark, become the master healer and once again, fix everyone else, generally at her own peril.

"Why, Clarke?" I murmured in her ear. "Why would you do that? Why didn't you tell me, or if not me, someone? I would have protected you. I would have protected them. I wouldn't let him lay a finger on any of you. The 100, these children, they've become my family, Clarke. _You_ , have become my family. I must be pretty lousy at showing it, but I would do anything for my family, for _you._ " A tear slid down my face again. Embarrassed, though there was no one there to see, I buried my face in her neck, holding her outstretched hand in mine. "Princess,"

"Dad." My head shot up. There it was again! I definitely wasn't dreaming this time. I glanced around the dropship once more. There was no one else in here! How on earth-

A noise that wasn't quite a word followed, but this time I saw it clear as day. Clarke's lips moved and her brow furrowed (adorably) as she spoke. SPOKE. As in not totally dead to the world!

"Clarke?" I put my hands on her shoulders. "Princess? It's Bellamy. Clarke!" One drowsy eye flicked open and I nearly burst into sobs. Of course nearly is not the same thing as actually. I maintained a stoic exterior despite my insides weeping with relief.

"Bell?" I shivered at the word coming from her lips.

"I'm right here Princess." She was breathing heavily and wincing with nearly every breath, but there was a shine to her eyes I hadn't seen in a while, a spark, conviction that hadn't been there since…well since she had started dating Murphy, I guess.

"I think…Bell…I think I just saw my dad." I shivered. Fuck. Had the fever affected her mind?! Very slowly I began to speak.

"Princess, you're on Earth. Your dad's not here, he's up on the Ark. Do you remember that you're on Earth?"

She rolled her eyes. "No he's not dumbass, he's dead. And of course I remember where I am, I'm not crazy." This lecture was followed by a coughing fit and I immediately moved to fetch her water. When I returned she had pulled her shirt back and was running her fingers delicately over the stitches on her stomach. "Lincoln did a good job."

"Octavia, actually." I commented. "I did your internal organs and she did the skin part." She raised one eyebrow.

"You'll have to teach me some time. I'm rubbish at stitches."

"It's a date." I said with a smile. After a pause she looked up at me nervously.

"I _am_ serious, Bell. I think I saw my dad. It was a dream…but also…I don't know, it wasn't. It was like it was real, and really happening. I was dying and he came and talked with me and said I couldn't follow him just yet, but that he'd be waiting when the time came. He said I had more to live for than this." I shivered at that. If that were true, she came closer to dying than we'd even thought. My jaw clenched and I found it impossible to relax it just yet.

"What else did he say?" If she'd had an excess of blood in her just then, (which I knew she didn't) I had the distinct feeling she would have blushed.

"Just…stuff." I nodded.

"Did he tell you that you were an idiot for agreeing to Murphy's demands? That I- that we would have protected you, protected everyone from him?" I said, raising an eyebrow questioningly. She shook her head with a small smile.

"No. Of everyone, he gets it. I mean he knew he'd die if he tried to tell everyone on the Ark that there was a problem with the air, that we were all going to die if we didn't get back to Earth soon, and that there weren't enough drop ships to fit us all. It was the freaking Titanic and he knew he'd be the first overboard if he tried to tell them all. And he tried it anyway. That's a much bigger sacrifice than what I made. Go a bit hungry, have to kiss some idiot who wasn't terribly fond of bathing? No biggie."

"Says the girl sitting here with thread in her stomach and a cast made out of a tree on her leg. Not to mention the bruises and scrapes, and blood loss and…" I trailed off, the words choking in my throat. "How he… _forced_ himself on you." She snorted.

"If it makes you feel better, he didn't force himself on me."

"What?" I asked. "But Charlotte said, she heard you. She heard what he said to you, and she heard you screaming and-"

"But luckily for whatever innocence she still has left, she didn't see him strip off his pants and then fail to get it up."

"What?"

"Oh yeah. He tried. He tried real hard. Only…well that was the only hard thing around."

"Clarke, you don't have to say this to make me feel better – it does, but it also doesn't because he still beat the shit out of you and you're still here, like this, and-"

"Bellamy. I'm dead serious. He wanted to, he said he wanted entertainment that he wanted to see what the big deal was with me." I swore, knowing he'd said a bit more than that.

"I know what he said, Princess, Charlotte hear it."

"I started screaming. I begged him not to. But when he tried, I guess women begging him not to, doesn't exactly turn him on. Of course then he was pissed so he started hitting me and kicking me. I don't think he was doing that on purpose though." I swore again, louder this time.

"Not on purpose? They guy kicked open your internal organs and broke your goddamned leg, Clarke! How naïve are you going to be here?!"

"No, not like that. I'm not excusing it. I'm just saying, I think after a while he forgot it was me. He kept talking to people who weren't there, his parents, I think. And he kept asking his dad if this was what it felt like when he beat mom. If it was the same. I think after a while, he thought I was his mom." I remained quiet. "It was when he grabbed a tree branch and started hitting my legs that the pain got to be too much. That's the last thing I remember for a while. I think I passed out. I vaguely remember being dragged away. I think he thought he'd killed me, wanted to hide the body. Then I passed out again. The next thing I remember is coming to and having your face over me." She smirked. "That's happening a lot lately."

"Clarke." I croaked out. How could she say all of that, so nonchalantly? She spoke as though she was telling me what Murphy ate for lunch. "When we found you, I thought. I thought you were going to die. And then you kept begging me to kill you and when you passed out again…Clarke I thought you were dead."

"It's going to take more than that for you to get rid of me, Blake." She said.

"I should have known better." We sat in silence for a while, just staring into each other's eyes. Finally I broke it. "How's the pain, Princess?"

"I feel like I got ran over by a dropship."

"Your color's coming back a bit." I noted. "And you're conscious and talking." She blushed.

"Your voice is really soothing. It's easier to ignore the pain when you're speaking." A bubble of pride welled up in my chest. "Tell me a story, Bell?" Slowly, as though I was trying not to startle her, I reached out and took her hand, sliding closer to her head, and gripping her fingers in mine. She closed her eyes gently, but was still clearly awake.

"Once upon a time," I began. "There was a beautiful Princess who was also, a pain in the ass."

* * *

 **Clarke**

Me. He was telling me a story about me. I knew I was blushing furiously and despite the waves of pain and the nausea that was accompanying that, I couldn't help feel a tingle of excitement amidst the extreme pain in my abdomen. I think…I think I'm in love with him, with Bellamy. I think this was the right path, _he_ was the right path to choose.

* * *

 **Abby**

I can't believe we were doing this. We were landing the entire freaking Ark! Yeah, so we didn't have enough drop ships to get everyone down and we needed an alternative plan, but still! Landing the Ark?! We were going to die. I was pretty sure we were going to die.

You know who wasn't so sure about that? Jaha. And Kane. They were totally convinced that everything was going to be fine. And weirdly enough? Kane was trying to…comfort me. I think. I was so confused! It was like he was this entirely new person, and yet it wasn't. Somehow, I had always known that this man lurked under the surface, his cynicism and anger towards me had always been covering up…something. I didn't really understand it, but I hadn't been this confused about a boy since my late husband had tried to date me.

Wait. That wasn't what Kane was doing, was it? No. No! He was just being a good friend. He saw that I was hurting and he was helping. Helping so much, in fact, that he now sat next to me as we buckled into one of the wall harnesses near the edge of the ship, the places our engineers had said would likely be protected in the crash. So helping, in fact, that he now reached out to hold my hand with a smile, as though he knew that I was going through some sort of internal crisis. The engines started to pick up and the ship began to quake beneath my feet. Somewhere far away I could hear a countdown. I turned to Kane and gripped his hand tightly.

"I really do think we're going to die." I told him for what felt like the hundredth time. Each time he came back with some sort of reassuring, soothing statement and I prepared myself for yet another one. However it never came. Instead he looked into my eyes with something I hadn't seen in a long time and nodded slowly.

"Maybe. I guess I better make the next few minutes count then." And with that his lips were on mine and a spark that felt more like electrocution than butterflies shot through my whole body. One hand still clutched mine desperately but the other had found the back of my head and was pulling me closer, closer, good God, impossibly closer. I was frozen. I had not expected that. I couldn't move, and only partly from shock. The other part was completely and entirely due to the stampede of feelings that were rushing through me, the excitement that I was feeling, and the surprise at how incredible and yet still perfectly natural this felt, like I was shocked we hadn't been doing this for a lot longer. Of course my frozen body told a different story to him and he reluctantly pulled back, looking away, embarrassed.

"I'm sorry." He said gruffly. "I didn't mean to upset you but I figured, you know, if we were about to die, I should at least show you how I felt." I looked into his eyes, still in shock, and saw something that made my heart beat just a little bit faster. Not only had that felt so right, more right than just about anything I had ever felt before, but there was something in the pain of being rejected, the pain of the thought that we may both die, that was so reminiscent of the looks I had seen on Bellamy Blake's face when he looked at Clarke.

"You love me." I said slowly, still not entirely believing it.

He nodded, not able to look at me, staring instead at the floor beneath his feet. "Always have." A spark ran across my skin, staying in my fingertips. Before I knew what I was doing I was unbuckling my harness and standing to my feet.

"What are you doing? Abby, don't do that! Just because I kissed you doesn't mean you have to go find a new seat. There's not enough time, Abby. Sit back down!" But I wasn't looking for a new seat. I slid onto his lap and pulled him in to me, claiming his lips with my own. His initial shock wore off a lot more quickly than my own had. His arms wrapped themselves around me and held me, protectively to his chest. My legs straddled him, and I realized that we must look like we were teenagers who had snuck into an unlocked lounge after school and were making out for the first time. Minus the bright young age, of course. One arm was firmly around my lower back, clutching me, pulling me in to him, while the other held the back of my head in that protective way I had noticed with a chill before. My lips were locked on his, my hands fisting the lapels of his leather jacket, somehow trying to pull myself closer though I was quite certain that wasn't possible. The world shook below me and I felt as though my head was spinning. This was…completely unexpected. This was…one of the weirdest, craziest things I had ever done in my entire life. This was…absolute bliss. There was something here. I didn't know how, or why, but there was an undeniable chemistry between us and it felt like heaven. Actual, real, heaven.

Suddenly we smashed together, our heads bumping and the feeling of rolling about, as though we'd hit a gravity pocket began. Kane gripped me tighter and held on as though I was drowning and he was lighting me to the surface. That's when I realized it, that feeling? Of the 'earth shaking beneath me' (a saying, obviously, we were on the Ark, floating in space, but the old earth saying had stuck), that feeling of my head spinning, that was because (at least partly because) we had been hurtling towards Earth. At some point during my make out session with a man I had hated no more than a month ago, we had left orbit and had begun our travel to Earth. And I hadn't noticed. Because I had been so involved with making out with Marcus Kane. A man who had just out himself in danger by not hanging out to his harness (as directed during rough turbulence – and I imagine even more so when one is hurtling towards Earth) and by hanging on to me instead. As we skidded to a halt, I looked into his eyes and he in mine.

"Good God, Abby, are you okay?"

"I don't think I was supposed to get up." I joked. We both glanced back to my seat laughing, but that laughter quickly died. Sticking through layer upon layer of treated metal, right where my head had been not too long before, was the large branch of what I assume was some sort of tree. Had I been sitting there when we landed, I would be dead. Beyond dead. I would have been obliterated.

"Holy-"

"You saved my life." I murmured, cutting him off. "Not just by getting me to move, but when we landed, you held on, I could have gone flying, hurting myself. Marcus-" Now it was his turn to cut me off, and he did so by once again pressing his lips firmly to mine, making my heart skip a beat.

"Abby," He whispered in my ear as he pulled back from the heated kiss. "We're going to get off this ship. Treat the wounded, and then we are going to find you daughter. And the minute we do that, the minute we get our people fixed up, find those kids, and get everything settled…Abby. I would like to take you on a date. I would like to take you on your first ever, Earth date." I smiled.

"I think that can be arranged." I said quietly, before leaning in for another kiss.

* * *

 **Jaha**

What in the hell had I just walked in on? I had all but ran as soon as we hit the ground to find her. I'd had feelings for her for a long time, since school really, but then she went and married my best friend, and what was I supposed to do about that? So I'd been that, just their friend. I watched her daughter, someone who should have been _my_ child, grow up, best friends with the son I'd had with my second choice of a wife. I had waged an internal war after she had told me what Jake was up to. _Convince him not to! He's your best friend, he'll listen to you!_ She'd said. And I had to decide whether or not I should try to convince him, or float him, and wait a respectable amount of time to romance his wife. I had chosen the first. I really had. After everything, I had tried to stop him, I had tried to make his see reason. But he hadn't. And I couldn't allow panic amongst my people. I really had no choice. So I'd had to float him, knowing that killing her husband meant I would never be able to be with her. But then I saw my life flash before my eyes on our journey to Earth, and that life was filled with her: her smile, her laugh, the way she looked so happy and content when she would braid Clarke's hair. She was everything that was good in my life. And I needed to tell her. I needed to tell her how I felt. So when we landed, I tore out of my harness and raced to the place I knew she had been assigned. But that was NOT what I expected to see.

Abigail Griffin was sitting astride a man she hated, (a man I now hated, too) clutching him like the world was ending, (to be totally fair, she may well have thought for a while there that the world _was_ ending) and kissing him so passionately people were turning away to give them privacy. I heard a woman joke about how a girl reacts when a man saves her life like as she walked out of the room. I stopped her and held her arm.

"What do you mean?" she smiled.

"I saw the whole thing. Dr. Griffin was real nervous when the countdown starts, you see. And all of a sudden Marcus Kane's holding her hand and looking like she's the only thing in the universe that matters at all and then he's kissing her and she's all frozen, not sure what to do so he pulls back, real sad. I haven't ever seen someone so upset in that way before, not over not getting a kiss anyhow. But then Dr. Griffin is unlatching her harness and scrambling out of her seat and he yells at her 'what are you doing' and so on and as it turned out, what she was doing was throwing herself on his lap and attaching herself to his face." The woman laughed and I felt a pool of anger filling my gut. "Then we're all yelling at them that we're about to take off, that this is dangerous, but they're in their own little world, see, so they don't hear a word we say and so we take off and people are screaming, or laughing, or any number of things and the two of them just keep kissing, him holding her as though he's been dying to hold her for as long as he's been alive and her so excited and happy that she pulls at him back. It was the most romantic and insane thing I've ever seen. Of course that was until we landed and a damned tree cuts through the ship and pierces right through where Dr. Griffin's head would have been had she been in her seat. When we land they started looking around all sheepishly and embarrassed until they realized that if Kane hadn't kissed her and she hadn't gotten up and all, she'd be dead as a doornail right about now. So they started a-kissing again." The woman laughed again. "I like them as a couple. I think they're pretty cute. I hope it works out between them." She kept walking and I couldn't help but stare as yet another one of my friends, shared their first romantic encounter with the girl of my dreams.

They didn't even like each other.

They fought all the time.

Kane was an asshole to her. Had been since…since…son of a bitch. Since she'd started dating Jake. He used to follow her around like a puppy back in school. Jake and I had always teased him about it. He was always the first one to jump to her defense when someone teased her behind her back, or when one of the guys had commented on her more physical…assets. He had been in love with her too. Then he went and had his heart broken when she chose someone else. But where I had to remain friends with Jake, where I had to watch her new family every day, he could become cold and bitter. He could resent her husband. He could cover his feelings with anger, disdain, and fighting. And now, now he still loved her. And was just going to jump in and claim her, just like that. Hah. Well I wasn't just going to lie down this time. I wasn't just going to let him take the girl I'd always wanted away from me. I was going to get her back.

* * *

 **A/N: What do you think? Please, please, pretty please review and tell me! XOXO - E**


	20. Chapter 20

**Well this is awkward...Thanks to everyone who let me know I posted the wrong chapter! I got to chapter 20 on two of my fics at the same time and I was thinking about that one while I was posting this so that's my bad! (But for those of you who noticed it was OUAT - feel free to go read that fic! The Lost Girl-Shameless Plug**

 **Heads up if you do The beginning is absolute shite and you will have to get in a couple chappies before it gets good!)**

 **Anyway, here is what I MEANT to post!:**

 **.**

 **.**

 **.**

 **Author's Note: It's short. I know. I'm sorry. Life is catching up with me and it's taking away my fun time AKA my writing time. I wanted to get you all at least SOMETHING to read so here it is! PLEASE REVIEW! Not only does it bring me great joy ;) but it also encourages my writing and helps me improve my prose. I love you guys! Here's chapter 20! (WOW! I can't believe you've stuck with me this long! You're all amazing!)**

* * *

 **Finn**

I was seething. Okay so maybe not 'seething' per say, but I certainly wasn't _thrilled_ at what was going on! Bellamy Blake FALLS ASLEEP when we're supposed to be watching over Clarke. (Oh, you're going to be up anyway so we should all go to bed you've got this covered? Really Bellamy? Evidently NOT! It's a damned good thing I stayed up!) Then I run out to pee and I'm gone for less than FIVE MINUTES and what do I come back to? She's woken up. And they're holding hands. And he climbs up onto her pallet with her and she folds herself into him. _Cuddling._ And he tells her a story. A really adorable story about a pain in the ass princess who goes on all sort of adventures and hunts jaguars and bears and dragons and ends up befriending one of the dragons and making it her pet and riding it everywhere and it's so true to Clarke's character that she would find a monster and decide that it was good after all WHILE SHE WAS BEING ATTACKED BY IT and then go ahead and make it good again and become it's best friend. Ugh. He was…he was really good with her. Even I had to admit that. And if I didn't have feelings for her…but that wasn't the point! I _did_ have feelings for her. And unlike Bellamy 'whatever-the-hell-we-want Blake', I admitted that. Right away. I told her how I felt. I acted on those feelings. I didn't sit around and wait for her to almost die to show interest.

Ugh. This was so not working out the way I thought it was going to.

* * *

 **Bellamy**

It had been two weeks. Two weeks since Clark had snuggled in my arms and listened with the most adorable smile on her face as I told her a story. Two weeks since Clarke had fallen asleep listening to that same story and mumbled my name in her sleep. Two weeks since we'd watched the fiery blaze in the sky, knowing that the Ark had indeed come hurtling to Earth. Two weeks since we'd spoken to anyone on the Ark. It was weird, knowing that they were here. On Earth. That we could go have a chat if we wanted. Not just a chat, we could go and touch them, get their help. And yet we didn't. We were prepping for winter nonstop. (Admittedly, using the advice O had gotten from Lincoln.) We were caring for Clarke nonstop. We were searching for Murphy nonstop. We didn't have time to go traipsing off after the Ark. If they wanted to find us, they would have to come to us. This morning, Wells had carried Clarke out of the dropship and set her up with some of the skins we were preparing as blankets and cloaks. We had learned about this in Earth Skills, but Lincoln's people had refined the art and the advice he'd sent back with O was making the process go a lot quicker. She was taking to it quickly and had this gleam on her face, a smile that I hadn't seen in a while.

"Clarke!" Raven called out as she traipsed over to the girl in question. "Why exactly do you look like you got into Monty's stash?" Clarke laughed, a lyrical sound that was every bit as tough and resilient as she was.

"Are you kidding? I'm outside! I'm helping everyone! It's weird, because on the Ark we never had the sun, just those weirdly tinted Vitamin D lamps everywhere, but when I was in the dropship all the time, I just missed the sun." I smiled. I knew exactly what she meant. Now that we'd all been on Earth, I couldn't imagine any of us volunteering to spend our time out of the green or away from the sun. She grabbed Raven's arm. "Raven. I want to go out."

"What?"

"Outside the fence. Come on, it's the middle of the day, everyone's around, and I'll just sit quietly in my chair. I just want to go out. To that little clearing just north of here. Half the camp is already there drying Octavia's stupid fruit and picking nuts! I won't even be alone! Please. Raven. You need to sneak me out of here."

"If all that's true, then why do we need to sneak you?" Raven's brow furrowed and Clarke rolled her eyes in response.

"Because Bellamy and Finn and Wells think I'm an infant who needs taken care of." I cleared my throat, alerting both women to my presence. Raven had a smirk on her face when she realized but it was Clarke's look of horror that I was captivated with. I laughed at her.

"So…" I began slowly. "I hear we're taking a field trip north." Her lips burst into a smile and I could actually feel my heart stutter.

* * *

 **Clarke**

A person had never so happily sat in one place and shelled nuts, sorting out the good from the bad. Never. And yet here I was, unable to keep a cheerful smile off my face and happily popping the meat of the nut out of the hard shell, inspecting the nut, and then sorting them into barrels. Maybe I was crazy. But for a few blissful hours, everything had been wonderful. Bellamy had carried me over, and while, on principle, I would have liked to protest the camps' treatment of me as an invalid, I couldn't find it in myself to do so. (And nothing I thought of, convinced myself that my lack of protestation had nothing to do with the soft, warm arms that had wrapped themselves around me and held me so close to _his_ chest that I could feel his heart beating.) So here I sat. Cheerfully shelling nuts and putting them into barrels. For hours. It was heavenly. Until I heard _it._ Until I heard _him_.

"Clarke." At first I thought I was imagining it. There was no way he was here, no way he had gotten past the rest of them and to my side. "Clarke, I need your help." I had stiffened, but now I slowly turned my head to the side and froze. It was impossible. "Clarke. Please. I did something. I did something really bad and I need your help or were all going to die. Believe me if there were any other way I wouldn't be here. I know what I did to you. Hell. Bellamy is probably going to kill me in a few minutes so I need you to listen because were all… _you're_ all going to die."

"Murphy." It wasn't a question. I think it was more so that my brain was finally registering who I was staring at.

"Clarke. There's this man. I don't know why, but he hates his father. And I don't totally understand all the issues at play, but somehow, that hatred has been transferred onto you lot and he's going to blow you all up if you don't stop him. You, the people from the Ark, the Grounders, everyone, Clarke. He's going to kill you all if you don't stop him."

"Murphy." I said again, still trying to wrap my head around his appearance.

"Shit. Come on Clarke. I screwed up, okay? I'm a horrible person, but I need you to understand. I need you to do something! Jesus, Clarke. If you don't believe me no one else will and then everyone's going to die! I helped him, okay? I was pissed off at everyone, at life, and I thought he could protect me from my past, from what I did to you, but Clarke, he's going to kill you all so I need to tell you everything. And you need to listen. I know that coming back here means I die, okay? I get it. But not coming back means the end of the world, and without an Ark up there in the sky, that means the end of humanity. And I've done a lot of shit but I really don't want _that_ on my conscious." I shook my head.

"What are you talking about, Murphy?"

"Thank God, she can understand me." He said, smarmily. "Listen up, Griffin. Because I'm about to tell you a shitton of shit and we have about a minute before your boyfriend realizes I'm here and kills me. Tops."

* * *

 **Bellamy**

Never had I seen someone so happy to simply shell nuts. It was laughable, almost. But then again…it also made me smile. _She_ made me smile. Especially when she smiled.

"SON OF A BITCH!" Finn's battle cry made me instantly follow his train of sight and what I saw made my blood burn under my skin. _He_ was kneeling at her feet, leaning in and speaking to her hurriedly. She looked terrified, concerned, and kept glancing around at the lot of us like…like…like we were all in danger. Like Murphy was threatening us. Son of a bitch indeed.

.

I don't even remember moving but I must have because moments later he was a much more palatable distance away from Clarke and his blood was dripping off my fingertips.

* * *

 **Clarke**

Wells was holding me back rather effectively as I tried to escape him. (It probably helped that I had messed up my internal organs and had a broken leg.) I cried out as I watched Bellamy, fire blazing in his eyes, something that was nothing short of pure fury. It wasn't that I didn't think Murphy deserved it. It wasn't that I didn't want to walk over there and beat the hell out of him myself. It was that Bellamy was slipping away. He was letting the dark, the anger take over. And if he beat John Murphy to death, I wasn't sure I could ever get him back.

"Bellamy!" I shrieked. "Stop! He's not worth it!" I begged. "Pleased! Don't do this."

"Let him be, Clarke." Wells said, his voice low and brimming on the edge of fury himself.

"He's going to destroy himself!" I argued back. "Don't you understand what doing that to another person would do to him?!" Wells softened for a moment, but looking back at Murphy his face hardened again and he shook his head.

"Bellamy knows what he's doing."

"No he doesn't you complete moron!" I screamed back angrily. "This is the man who couldn't even kill Atom to put him out of his misery with the acid fog! He can't do this, Wells, it will destroy him!" I looked around to anyone who could help, but not a single person seemed willing to step up and stop Bellamy. Even Finn looked on with cold approval of Bellamy's actions, holding back Raven who seemed convinced of the same thing I was.

"You idiot." She was seething. "Don't let him do this! Clarke is right!" Finally, the one person no one had thought to restrain stepped forward. My heart caught in my chest as Charlotte took hold of Bellamy's outstretched arm. He nearly threw her off of him, but catching sight of who it was he paused.

"We slay out demons." She said slowly. "We don't become them." Bellamy looked from her face, back to mine, where I silently begged him with my eyes. He slowly nodded at me, understanding what I was asking. He turned to Murphy, lying, moaning on the ground.

"Get out." He growled. "If you ever show your face here again, I won't hesitate to kill you."

"Clarke," Murphy began, spitting out blood and what looked like a tooth. "Remember what I told you. You have to save them."

"Get. Out." Bellamy groweled.

"Clarke!" He pleaded.

"GET OUT!" Bellamy's roar made my bones shake inside my body. I gripped his arm to keep him from rushing at the man at his feet. Murphy's eyes pleaded and I nodded quickly.

"I remember. Okay? I remember. Cage Wallace, mountain men, we're all going to die. I got it."

After my hurried assurance Murphy didn't waste any time. He scrambled away, limping heavily, over the hill. My eyes followed his path and I gasped in shock. There at the top of the hill, stood a handful of people. Not grounders in tribal wear. Not Mountain Men in HAZMAT suits. Just people. People I knew.

Arkians.

Mom.


	21. Chapter 21

**Author's Note: So healing timelines are super off here. I didn't do much research in that vein and I really need her to be okay sooner rather than later. When I finish this fic I will go back and fix that. Also I know that I'm horrible. It's been like a month. I'm awful. But I'm working on it I swear!**

* * *

 **Clarke**

"Stop fidgeting Clarke."

"I'm not fidgeting, I'm impatient. Lincoln has been checking me out frequently. I'm fine." I was annoyed. Very annoyed. We were all in mortal danger and my mother and her right hand named Jackson were fussing about wounds that were well on their way to healing. But then again…my mother was here. Next to me. Fussing. Next to me. That was…that was pretty okay. The flaps of the tent flew open dramatically and a small horde of my friends rushed in.

"It's been long enough, Doc." Monty exclaimed anxiously. "What's the deal? Did we do okay? Is she gonna be okay?" A bit shocked at the sudden influx of visitors into the tent, my mother just stared at my friends.

"Oh my gosh. She paused." Jasper slapped his hand to his forehead and turned around, horrified. "She paused! Clarke's gonna diiiiiiiieeeee."

"Shut up, goggles." Octavia pinched him goodheartedly. "Let the woman speak."

"Dr. Griffin. Ignore the children." Bellamy's gruff voice cut through the chatter and commotion as he pushed past them and sat at my side taking my hand in his. "Please. Is everything okay?"

"Everything's…actually everything is looking on track for healing." I heard he joyful chatter from the others, but I didn't look away from the sudden calm that came to Bellamy. He sighed, his shoulders relaxing for the first time in hours. His grip on my hand tightened and his head sank down, relief permeating his mien.

"Thank God."

"Told you." I teased him. "Lincoln had it covered. And of course there was some really impressive work from all those amateurs who pitched in too."

"Haha! Yeah buddyyyy!" Jasper and Monty were doing some odd little dance behind Bellamy, Octavia rolling her eyes the whole time. Bellamy looked like he was about to cry and after a few moments of us just staring at each other, relief that at least for this one moment, everything was okay.

"Thank God." He repeated, burring his face in my side.

"Did we miss the verdict? Is everything okay?" Wells and Charlotte bounded in and the relief at seeing someone she knew and trusted was palpable on my mother's face was obvious.

"She's okay. She's gonna be fine." My mother repeated. Charlotte let out a soft sob and the small crowd of my family parted, letting her through so she could run to my side. I opened my arms and let her climb up onto the pallet I was sitting on. She nestled into my arms and cried.

"I was so scared Clarke. I thought we were gonna mess it up. I thought you were gonna die."

"Don't be silly. You all, you especially, Charlotte, you did an amazing job taking care of me and I am going to be really, really great."

"Not only that, but you really saved me today, Charlie." Bellamy said, taking her hands in his. "You looked out for me and kept me from doing something awful."

"You and Clarke and Wells always look out for me. It's about time I returned the favor." Bellamy bowed his head at her words and slid up onto the pallet next to us. Charlotte nestled further into my arms and I relished in the warmth as Bellamy wrapped the both of us up and held on tightly.

"Everything's going to be okay." He sighed.

"Actually…" I began. "Not so much."

"What?"

"Murphy, he…he came to warn us."

"Bull."

"Bell he was serious. I think we're in trouble."

"From who? Lincoln assured us that the Grounders agreed to live and let live, we don't bother them, they don't bother us."

"The Grounders, sure. Not the Mountain Men."

"They never leave Mount Weather. They can't be out for any extended period of time. They could be out here for a couple hours at most. It puts them at a disadvantage. And we've built structures to withstand the acid fog."

"I'm sorry." My mother interrupted. "Did you just say, acid fog?"

"Yeah. When we get too close to something they want the mountain men release acid fog to try and kill us." Wells filled in quickly.

"And the Reapers? They can send out Reapers on us at any minute." Monty suggested.

"That's not all. Murphy said that they have a whole host of Grounders locked up in Mount Weather. He said that they are transfusing their blood into their warriors so that they will be immune to the radiation, able to stay out a whole lot longer. Not only that, but they have nuclear weapons. It was just a power source at first, to back up their hydroelectric, but someone went in and weaponized them. They want to take us out. All of us. Take us out, but not before they've taken a whole hell of a lot of our blood so they can leave the mountain."

"And we're trusting Murphy, now?" Bellamy snapped.

"He knew what you were going to do to him, Bell. Why else would he come here but to warn us?"

"Why would he care about us. He _wants_ us to die, Clarke."

"He's in over his head, Bell. He got in with them and didn't realize what they wanted. He thought they'd just kill us and move on but they're taking out the whole of the human population outside of Mount Weather. Speaking of, we need to get the Grounders in on this. Octavia?" I nodded at her. She whistled and the sound of huff beats pounded up to the tent.

"Check it out guys, Lincoln got me a horse!" She whispered excitedly, opening the flap and showing me. Bellamy rolled his eyes but didn't say a word against it.

"Be careful, O."

"Where's the fun in that?" She asked, swinging up. I hoped off the table and pushed aside my mother's medical tools.

"Jasper, can you get me that map Lincoln gave Octavia?" Jasper rushed off to grab it. "Monty get the others. We need to plan."

"We don't even know this is real, Clarke. It could be a trap." Bellamy reminded me harshly.

"I know. But if it isn't, we need to be prepared, and if it is, we need to prepare for that." He nodded. Satisfied with the answer.

"Clarke, sweetie. Slow down. You don't need to worry about this. We can go to Jaha, tell him everything you know and then the adults will take care of it. You kids don't have to worry about this anymore." I looked around, the others looking back.

"All due respect, Dr. Griffin, but that's the last thing we plan to do." Wells said, confident as always.

"I know you're used to being in control, being in charge, but this is our world now not your world. We have cultivated a nature of peace between ourselves and the Grounders and they don't trust you. They won't deal with you. I know you've been studying about Earth a long time, but we've been living here and a lot of what you think isn't true. You aren't in control any more. This is our fight. This is our community. And if you lot think you're going to come down here and act like you're still in charge you have another thing coming. This is us. This is ours. We're in charge now. And you are just going to have to fall in line or we will be setting ourselves up as a separate entity. One of the Grounder Tribes. And we will be with them, not you."

"Clarke!"

"Dr. Griffin. The 100 has lived here for months now. We know more about this world than you could hope for at this point. We have made our homes here. And no matter what their parents say to them, The 100 will follow Clarke. And so will a great many of Arkians who are scared, and in all honesty, don't trust the council anymore. You would do well to listen to your daughter."

"I don't appreciate your tone, Mr. Blake."

"I don't appreciate how you've treated your daughter like a child. She is our leader. And as I said. You would do well to fall in line."

"Bellamy." Lincoln's deep voice filled the small tent as he and Nikko stepped inside. "Octavia said we have trouble. "Lexa wants to talk. She asks that you and Clarke meet her at the bridge."

"Octavia could have told us. You didn't have to come all the way here."

"She mentioned that some of the Arkians were injured in the landing. Nikko and I wished to offer our help." Bellamy nodded and the two men clasped arms.

"Good man. Lincoln this is Dr. Griffin. She will lead you to those who need help."

"Griffin?" he asked looking at me. "So this is-"

"My mother. The one who spoke on the radio during my operation, as I understand." Lincoln held out his hand.

"Doctor." He nodded. She took it warily, looking up at the tribal looking man, still unsure of everything that happened around her.

"Now what?" Jasper asked, returning with the map I had requested.

"Now we wait for Raven."

"And then?"

"And then plan for a war."

* * *

 **Lexa**

Today I would meet with SkiKru. Today I would add a 13th tribe. I would do what no Commander had done since the first. I would unite our troops tenfold. I would Lead us victorious against even the Mountain Men. I had been watching Bellamy and Clarke since they landed and they were exactly what I needed. They were natural born leaders and their people followed them with a kind of loyalty that was more rare than I could begin to explain. Then, their parents landed. A God damned spaceship out of the sky. They would try to take over, those bumbling idiots who had no idea what kind of world they had just stumbled into. They had damned well better follow Bellamy and Clarke. I would support the pair, my people and I. They would inspire loyalty, even in the "adults" or I would force them to. This was it. The beginning. We would rid the world of the men who ruled over the mountain people once and for all. The Wallaces. Trapping the unknowing innocents inside, telling them that all was well, that they were good, that nothing else happened in the world but their little butterflies and rainbows world.

I would liberate the naive fools from their evil masters. And I would unite the entirety of what was left of the human population. I would be the Commander to fulfill the wishes of all those before me.

Today.


	22. Chapter 22

**Author's Note: Thanks to everyone who is sticking with me after I took a brief hiatus! I really appreciate all of you! I hope that you all enjoy reading this chapter – it's a bit lighter so that should help offset some of the harsher aspects of this story. Anyway, I'm so glad you're all reading, PLEASE review so I know what you are thinking and where you want me to go with this fic!**

* * *

 **Abby**

This was…impossible to comprehend. These children had created a whole community down here. They had made treaties with Native populations, that were about to wage a war they were…they were so utterly in control of our people in a way that I don't think we ever were. Jaha put his hand on my arm.

"Hard to watch, isn't it?"

"How on Earth could I have imagined this?"

"Indeed. It would appear our children have taken notice of our leadership and emulated it." I laughed.

"No. It would appear our children have taken notice of our mistakes and are doing their best to be better than we ever were." Jaha frowned. "These friends of theirs, Lincoln and Nikko, they've been incredibly helpful. Our Earth studies classes were flawed. We taught our children about Earth as we left it, but there was a nuclear war since then. Everything is different. Different plants do different things, there are…" I trailed off. "It's astounding." Jaha nodded.

"Abby." I could feel my cheeks flush at the very sound of his voice. Marcus. I bit my lip to try and hide the childlike smile that was spreading across my face and I turned around.

"Hey." I said, simply.

"Don't make fun of me." my brow furrowed.

"What are you talking about?"

"I did something cheesy." He wiggled his brows and I had to bite back a laugh.

"What?" I asked excitedly. With a flourish he whipped out a handful of flowers from behind his back.

"What do you think? The first Arkian in about a century to give a girl some flowers. Pretty cheesy, right?" I shyly took the flowers from him, smelling the diverse aroma with a thrill.

"Yes. Absolutely." I replied with a smile. "I love them." he smiled and took my hand in his.

"Come on. You've got to see this." He dragged me away and it wasn't for a few hundred yards that I remembered that I had been in the middle of a conversation with Jaha. Oops. He would understand.

"What is it?" I asked as he led me out into the forest. "Where are you taking me?"

"Some of the kids showed me. The radiation, well...you'll see." Dusk was falling and I couldn't help but be a bit nervous as he led me into the darkening woods.

"Marcus, are you sure this is safe?" With a carefree laugh he pulled me close and kissed my cheek.

"I'll protect you from the big bad wolf Abby." I gave him a half smile and curled up into his embrace. His arm wrapped around me and he led me down what could only be a deer trail. "Close your eyes." He said, stopping suddenly. "I want you to get the full effect when we're there." Trustingly, I closed my eyes and let him lead me slowly down the trail, letting me know when there was a root or rock to step over. Finally we stopped. I could feel his heat, emanating off of him as he stood close before me. His lips pressed to mine in an electric kiss that made my heart flutter. As soon as it started, he pulled back. "Open your eyes, Abby." He whispered, his breath tickling my eyelids. Slowly, not really wanting this moment in his embrace to end, I did as he asked.

I gasped. All around me, there was light. Butterflies flew around, wings alit with colors that glowed against the dusky sky. The plants in the clearing Marcus had led me to glowed pleasantly too. It was as though the entire earth was alive with color and light now that the sun was sinking in the sky.

"This is...stunning." I whispered, watching a moth with electric blue wings flutter closer and closer to my face.

"Yes." He replied. When our eyes met, I was very aware that he wasn't paying the slightest bit of attention to our surroundings. His face was lit up from the glowing wildlife around us, flitting about, sending the colorful lighting zipping across his skin in patterns and designs that made my breath catch in my throat. "Abby I...I'm in love with you. I have been for a long time. And I don't expect you to say it back. In fact I don't want you to because I know you've only started exploring these feeling recently but I thought you should know that you have someone in your corner. Irrevocably. I know that things are really confusing right now and that you don't quite know what your place is nor where you stand with your daughter. But while you figure that out, I wanted to make sure that you knew that I love you. That I will always back you, and that when you don't know where you belong, you belong right here. With me."

* * *

 **Clarke**

"Hey Princess." The younger Blake sauntered over to me, pulling me aside and glancing about to be sure no one was watching. "Do you know where your mom is?" A million thoughts as to why Octavia would need a doctor...one that WASN'T Lincoln flashed through my mind and not one of the scenarios were what I might call 'good'.

"Jesus, O. Did you not listen to what I said?" I hissed under my breath to her. "Are you pregnant?"

"Fuck! Clarke, no! It's not a medical thing at all! I just wanted to talk to her is all!" My heart rate slowed to a more manageable rate and I smiled at my friend.

"Give a girl a heart attack, wont you? Note to Octavia: when you ask someone where a doctor is when you are, in fact, dating another doctor who you clearly aren't looking for as well, pregnancy is one of the first things that comes to mind."

"Pregnancy?!" Shit. The other Blake. "O, are you pregnant? That son of a bitch I'm going to skin him alive and-"

"I'm not pregnant!" Octavia assured him, gripping his arm. "I just wanted to talk to Dr. Griffin is all!"

"Why?" I asked, my brow furrowing. Fears now assuaged, it still was an odd request of her. After a brief pause, a blush filled her cheeks and she glanced away.

"I wanted to say thank you."

"For what?" Bellamy asked, clearly as confused to see Octavia embarrassed by something as I was.

"For not turning me in."

"O, what are you talking about."

"After I was born, that sickness thing was going around and everyone was getting vaccinated but mom knew that if I didn't I would die so she reached out to the only person besides the two of you who knew I existed."

"Someone else knew?!" Bellamy exclaimed. Clearly this was the first time he had heard of this.

"Yeah. The doctor who was supposed to terminate me." Octavia glanced at me shyly. "Your mom." I stared at her in shock. I had never heard of this either. "When mom went in to take care of me, she broke down in tears and begged Dr. Griffin not to do it. Clarke was in the med bay, playing with some friend at the time, and just before Dr. Griffin explained the law to her and called in security to help sedate her, she caught a glimpse of her own daughter, playing, and changed her mind." She messed the charts up, to say that mom had never been pregnant at all, that she simply had a bug, and that she would have to come in for checkups every month to get it checked out. That meant mom could come in to Dr. G and make sure I was progressing okay. She helped mom get clothes that would hide her pregnancy and snuck her the vitamins she would need." Octavia took a breath. "After I was born, she would come over to 'order some clothing made' from mom but really she would check me out, make sure I was okay, growing all right, that sort of thing. But when I was like, 2 or something, there was that sickness and I needed a vaccine and Dr. G got it for me, but the Council noticed that they had given out more vaccines than children who existed and were on red alert, looking for a hidden person. They threatened to float anyone who knew something and hadn't told them. If Dr. Griffin had just turned me in, she wouldn't have gotten in trouble, but instead she admitted to making a mistake with a vaccination, and doing it wrong, which led to her having to do it a second time on a child. She got fined pretty heavily for wasting a vaccine and suspended from her job without pay for like a month. Times were tight for them for a while because she covered for me. I just wanted to say thank you." Tears were streaming down Bellamy's face by the end of this story. He wrapped Octavia in a hug and cried into her shoulder. I stepped back, giving them a moment alone. Turning, I went in search of my mother. Octavia wanted to say thank you...but so did I.

* * *

"I think she and Kane went into the woods to go check something out." Harper responded nonchalantly. "Ask Monroe, she and Kane were talking earlier." I made my way over to the girl in question and sat down on the log beside her, holding my hands out to the fire to warm up.

"Hey, you don't happen to know where Kane or my mom are, do you?"

"Wait, are they like, together?" She asked with a smirk.

"Not like that!" I assured her. "I mean I think they are physically together right now, Harper saw them walk off together, so I figured if I can find Kane, he's probably with my mom."

"Whatever you say, Griffin." She said with a laugh. "All I know, is that earlier today, Kane asked a few of us if there were any particularly romantic places he could take some girl, and no Dr. G takes a nighttime walk with him? _If_ what I think is happening is happening, they're in that radiation soaked butterfly field half a mile north of here." I stared at the girl in shock. My mom. And Councilman Kane. Didn't they hate each other? I mean if that _was_ a thing, way to go mom, I guess, but the likelihood of those two being together was pretty farfetched.

"Yeah, okay. Thanks. I'll check there." I made my way to the edge of camp, only to be stopped by the Blakes.

"Did you find your mom?"

"Harper and Monroe think she's with Kane in that field north of here." Octavia narrowed her eyes.

"That seems oddly romantic."

"I'm sure they're just checking out the radiation levels or the plants or something. Last I checked those two hated each other." I assured her.

"Yeah. But then again last I checked you and Bellamy hated each other and now I'm pretty sure you guys are doing it like all the time." A severe blush flushed over my cheeks.

"We are not!" I protested.

"Seriously, O. Let's just go find our Doctor friend." Bellamy said, changing the subject. I noticed with a small glow in my chest that he didn't contradict Octavia or tell her that what she suggested was impossible. In fact, as we tread quietly through the darkness, his fingers seemed to be seeking out mine, brushing against my hand purposefully. Finally, taking a deep breath, I opened my fingers and gripped his hand, holding it tightly in my own.

And that was that. We were holding hands. His thumb caressed the backs of my knuckles and I shivered at the touch.

"You guys know that I can see you, right?" Octavia asked obnoxiously. Instead of releasing my hand from his, Bellamy held on tighter and nodded at his sister.

"Yes ma'am." He said, almost proudly. "And I'm assuming you can see this, too." Quickly, in a movement I had no time to prepare myself for, Bellamy pushed me up against a nearby tree and captured my lips in his. It wasn't some crazy, passion filled moment. It was sweet and gentle, and spoke of potential by way of the spark that traveled across my skin. Even though it was pretty tame, I could tell that Bellamy was similarly affected.

"Really?" Octavia asked, doing her best to sound annoyed amidst the giant grin plastered to her face.

"Really." Bellamy said, holding my hand as I untangled myself from the branches he had thrown me into. "Also, you can go back to camp tonight and tell everyone about that so the guys can stop talking about how now with Murphy out of the picture Clarke is on the market again." He said, sounding almost territorial. "She's not." A shiver went down my spine and I had to bite my lip to keep from grinning ear to ear.

"Come on." I said sheepishly. "We've got us a doctor to find." We made our way down the path, guided by the bright glow ahead. Radiation was a bitch. But...it was also pretty cool. Stepping into the glade, I moved further into Bellamy's embrace. This was an incredibly romantic spot, that was for sure, especially at night. He pressed a kiss into my hair and wrapped his arm around my shoulders, holding me close.

"You feeling okay?" He asked. "It's a long walk."

"I feel great actually. I think getting some movement is helping." He nodded.

"I don't see them. Maybe Monroe was wrong?" Octavia suggested. Then her brow furrowed. "What is that noise?" She asked. I froze, listening. Sure enough, there were some heavy breathing sounds, just to the right of the clearing. Also something else, a noise I couldn't quite place, quietly filled the air. I moved towards the sound, curiosity winning out over the fear that it might be a bear or a lion or something equally terrifying.

"Oh. My. God." The words were out of my mouth before I even fully registered what I was seeing. Marcus Kane had my mother wrapped in his arms, pressed up against a large tree trunk, her fingers in his hair, their lips devouring one another." My mother looked up, panicked, and upon seeing me let out a small scream. Marcus Kane was making out with my mom like two teenagers. This was...this was...

I started to laugh. This was amazing.

"Clarke!"  
"Oh my God, mom!" I gasped out between laughs. "Guys I found her!" I called out to Bell and Octavia. The duo before me quickly separated themselves from one another and tried their best to put their clothing to right.

"Were they just..." Octavia asked with a smile.

"Yup!" I announced happily.

"Clarke, sweetie, I'm so sorry!" My mom begged.

"How is it that I haven't seen my boyfriend all day and yet I've now had to stand all alone while two different couples make out?" Octavia complained.

"Sorry for bothering you guys..." I said teasingly. "We had no idea what you were up to out here. Alone. In the woods."

"Clarke..."

"Hey! Don't apologize to me! I'm sorry I interrupted! We'll get out of your hair!" I erupted into a fit of giggles and I grabbed Bellamy's hand and made my way in the other direction. "Not just anyone!" I said with a laugh. "Councilman Kane! God this is an amazing day." I turned my head back towards my mother. "When you get back tonight Octavia wants to talk to you, mom!" I called out with a laugh.

"It could be worse..." Octavia said, pinching me teasingly.

"Worse? Its Kane! Way to go, mom!" I said smirking. Really though. Way to go mom. I was proud of her. She needed someone in her life. And I was happy she had him.


	23. Chapter 23

**Author's Note: So there are a lot of Point of View shifts in this chapter. Like WAY more than I realized. So sorry about that if you're one of those people who hates that! I hope you can forgive me! Anyway, here's the next chapter. xoxo - E**

* * *

 **Clarke**

We were the 13th tribe. Ski Kru. Lexa had met with Bellamy and I, and inducted the 100 into the Grounder Alliances. The adults, however, were not included. It was the original 100 that had all the benefits and duties of a clansman, the others, looked at as our allies, but not quite theirs. They would have to earn the right to be in the tribes. Just like we had. Of course this pissed a lot of them off. Until a bunch of scary looking Grounders came to camp and explained it in a rather intimidating manner. Then any negative comments were kept to themselves. Lexa had dressed the lot of us up, for the ceremonies. Raven and a friend of hers, Wick, had taught some of the Grounders a few tricks when it came to building proper explosives, and as thanks, a great deal of clothing was donated to the 100. We could dress warmly, for winter now. We mostly went around in combinations of the warm, furs and leathers that we had been gifted and the thick leggings, socks and boots, we'd taken from the Ark stockpile. A combination of Grounder and Ski Kru. Now we were formulating a plan. A plan to turn back the Reapers. A plan to take out the Wallaces. A plan to take back the Earth.

* * *

 **Bellamy**

This was very possibly the stupidest plan we'd ever come up with. Yes. Let's just go ahead and send the girl who had recently been beaten within an inch of her life out to meet with the men who were planning on taking out the entire planet in a single go and be our decoy. Wonderful. Oh. Also she'd probably be in contact with the man who beat her.

"Absolutely not." I said gruffly. "Someone else can go."

"They wouldn't take the word of someone who isn't a leader."

"Then I'll go."

"I've met Wallace." One of Lexa's advisers spoke. "He'll want to meet with Clarke." I growled at him angrily.

"And why is that?"

"I'm sorry, have you seen the girl we're talking about?" He replied snarkily. I stood up and took a step closer to the man, doing my best to lord over him.

"Watch yourself."

"Bellamy." Clarke's hand found mine, pulling me back. "Bell, it's fine. Really. It's a good plan. I can't do a lot of the physical stuff, so this is a good job for me. Really. Raven and Wick can take out the exits while I'm in there, and I can escape out the tunnels with the Reapers."

" _That's_ a good plan? Clarke, that is an awful plan! I'm not letting you do that!"

"It's not really up to you, Bell." She said, a bit tensely. "Clarke! It's dangerous!"

"No more dangerous than any other part of this mission."

"It's a hell of a lot more dangerous than my part." Octavia muttered angrily. "My part in this plan could be done by a monkey in a bubble."

"Good!" I yelled at her before turning back to the problem at hand. "This isn't going to go well, Clarke. This is-"

"This is what we signed up for. We're the 13th tribe. And now, the tribes are going to work together to put the Wallaces out of power and instill one of our own as the Mountain Men's leader. So don't. Just, don't Bell." She turned to Lexa and held our her hand. "Deal. Let's do this."

* * *

 **Clarke**

"Bell." I whispered, grabbing his hand. He grinned at me and followed, stepping out of the glow the fires cast over the ground. Slipping back to his tent, we walked in silence, knowing this was the last time we'd see each other in a while, and knowing, but very adamant about _not_ admitting it aloud, that this may be the last time we saw each other alive. For all we knew, I'd be blasted to hell the moment I knocked on the entrance to Mount Weather. For all we knew, I wouldn't be successful if I did get in, and the Mountain Men would obliterate everyone outside their ring of safety. This could be it. The end. And it wasn't a moment we were about to waste. His lips found their way past my collar bone and nudged down the neckline of my tunic. I closed my eyes and gripped his hair.

"Bellamy." I breathed out.

* * *

 **Bellamy**

When we were finished, we lay in each other's arms, sweating, panting, gripping each other so tightly I wasn't sure how it was even possible to let go. How on Earth had I thought that I could just sleep with Raven and forget her? That every other girl I had been finding comfort in could stand up to what I had just experienced? That must have been what everyone else had been talking about. It really was better when you were in love.

* * *

 **Clarke**

I awoke in the early hours of the morning, and placing a quick kiss on Bellamy's brow, careful not to wake him, I hurried outside, dressing myself and getting ready for the day ahead of me. I caught site of Lexa, sitting in front of her fire, I didn't go over to talk with her. We both knew the plan. We didn't need to discuss it ad nauseam. She gave me a slow nod, wishing me good luck ad showing her trust in me all in one go. I returned the gesture and make my way out of camp. I didn't want to say goodbye to anyone else. I didn't think I could say goodbye to anyone else. Goodbye meant I might never see them again. Goodbye meant I was leaving either never to return, or about to fail to save them all. And that wasn't an option. So no. I didn't say goodbye.

* * *

 **Murphy**

What in the Sam hell was she doing? Clarke Griffin. Walking straight up to the damned edge of Mount Weather and knocking on the damn door. What a fucking idiot. Hadn't she fucking listened to me? Wasn't she going to do her damndest to save everyone? Wait a minute...of course she was going to try to save everyone. She had a plan. This was part of her damned plan. And I would help in any way that I could. I owed her. I owed her a whole hell of a lot.

* * *

 **Abby**

And I had thought that Ark politics were complicated. Yet here these _children_ were, being inducted into a tribal alliance, working with warriors to plan a coup for a group of people planning a worldwide genocide...it was absolutely ludicrous to even imagine working in a political environment like that. I certainly wouldn't volunteer. But my own child was considered a leader among her people, she was surging forward to help, to do what she could for her people. She was becoming a warrior, a politician, a healer, all at once. And Bellamy Blake...the man who had shot the Chancellor to get in on a suicide mission. He was doing everything he could to protect her, to keep her from danger, he was very clearly in love with her. And something about that terrified me. She had the weight of the world (literally, the _world, Earth,_ ) resting on her shoulders and yet I hadn't seen her this carefree and happy since...well since before her father had embroiled himself in the twisted politics of the Ark. And I couldn't but think that might be because of her friends. Her _criminal_ friends. One criminal in particular. And it unnerved me. She was...she was better than that. Stronger than that. She shouldn't be so involved with them. She should be...I don't know. But her close connection to some of these people, well, for lack of a better way to say it, I wanted them far, far away from my daughter. And that list started with Bellamy Blake.

"Abby?" His voice lilted towards me as his hand softly held my upper arm. "What is it?"

"I have this...I don't know. I just have this feeling that won't go away." I began as Marcus looked at me with great concern.

"About..."

"Bellamy Blake. I know what you said, about, well, everything. And I tried to put it out of my mind but I'm a mother, Kane, I have pretty good intuition, and I'm telling you, there is something wrong here. There's something wrong with him, and his interactions with my daughter. I don't like it."

"Hey, Abby. Don't let it bother you too much, okay? I believe you. And I'll keep an eye on Clarke and Bellamy and I'm not going to let him hurt her, okay? I'm going to keep the pair of you safe." Before I could respond, a third voice piped up.

"Dr. Griffin?" I turned and my gaze instantly softened. The _other_ Blake.

"Octavia." I said simply. "Are you all right?"

"Yeah. Totally, I just wanted to talk to you for a second."

"Okay. Did you want to go somewhere private, or..."

"No! No, this is fine. I just wanted to say..." She took a deep breath and looked me dead in the eyes. "I just wanted to say thank you. I'd be dead so many times over if it weren't for you. And another few times again if it weren't for Clarke. You gave up a lot when you helped my mom and I know it wasn't easy for you, so just...thanks." She was blushing, looking at her feet." I softened at the clear nervousness of the girl in front of me. Wrapping her in a hug, I kissed the top of her head.

"I can't tell you how grateful I am that I did that." I said to her. "You changed my life. Before you, I took the Ark rules without question, never doubted that they were necessary and correct. But you...well. Who could want to get rid of someone like you?" She smiled up at me.

"Thanks, Dr. G." She turned to Kane and smirked at the confused look on his face. "Hey. It wasn't really a good time to introduce myself when we last saw each other." It was Marcus's turn to blush. "But I'm Octavia Blake. Bellamy's sister."

" _Sister_?" She held her head high and nodded.

"Yeah. Dr. G saved me and helped my mom get all my health needs taken care of when I was living under the floor."

"Oh. You're..." He suddenly went pale.

"That girl they found under the floorboards, yeah."

"...Aurora Blake's child." Her brow furrowed but she nodded.

"Yeah. Aurora was my mom. Before you guys floated her." Kane was deathly pale. "Hey," She cut in, grabbing his arm. "It was a different world up there. There wasn't room or air for people to make mistakes. I get it, okay? I'm over it. Really. Well maybe not over it, but I understand where everyone was coming from. And I don't blame you, you know?"

"How old _are_ you exactly? I vaguely remember the trial and that was never made clear."

"Yeah. Mom wanted to protect whoever my father was, because it wasn't like he knew or anything. So in case someone knew who mom was hooking up with at the time, no one could blame him. But I guess it doesn't really matter now. I turned 17 a few weeks before the dropship launched." She turned back to me. "I promised Clarke I'd watch Charlotte while she was gone. I'm gonna go check on her. I just wanted to say thanks." She trotted off but before I could focus on a single thing she said, I had to figure out why my... why Marcus was hyperventilating.

"Are you all right?"

"Abby I..."

"What? What is it?"

"I think she's my daughter."

* * *

 **Clarke**

"I thank you for your candidness, Miss Griffin. Though I must say..." The younger Wallace lowered his eyes at me, obviously exceedingly suspicious. "We've been watching the lot of you since you've arrived, and you are so...loyal. To your people, I mean. You are loyal and you would obviously do anything for your people and yet all of a sudden, you leave them and turn to us."

"My father risked everything to save the Ark, when he found a flaw in the air purification systems. And they killed him for it. I felt loyalty to saving the human race, sir. But I in no way feel loyal to the bastards that killed him for trying to help." I glanced at Murphy, his eyes were wide and he was mouthing something... _he knows._ The treaty. "Then of course," I added before Wallace could interject. "There's the Grounders. They tried to deal with us. Induct us as their 13th tribe. But they lied to me. Lexa lied to me. I was promised that there would be peace, that everyone would be allowed to live as they liked, those in the mountain, my people in the Ark, everyone. But what they didn't mention was that all tribes were bound to fight battles for the Commander. And our _Commander_ ," I spat out the word, "failed to mention that she only meant peace for her people. That _my_ people and our advanced weaponry were going to be used to fight her battles with the Mountain Men for her, while her people remained safe in their beds. I won't be used. Not like that."

"So you've decided to come work for us, then?"

"I've decided to show my people the way into the light, into what is _right._ " I said. "And that, well that is _not_ the Commander." The elder Wallace nodded, pleased, thought the younger one (Cage? That was a weird name, that couldn't be right,) was still staring at me in a way that made my bones shiver.

"Very good, Miss Griffin. And now your old friend, another runaway from the evils of the Ark, Murphy can show you to your bedroom. Some clothing will be brought out for you shortly, as well as a doctor to check for any adverse effects the outside has had on you." I nodded. I was in. I would have to be careful, they likely had my room, the hallways, everywhere, bugged. So I'd be careful. But I was in. Which meant I could find it.

 **Author's Note: Thank you all so much for reading! I haven't gotten many reviews lately so I'm not really sure what you are liking or hating which means I'm writing in the dark here. PLEASE let me know what you are all thinking! Love you guys! xoxo - E**


	24. Update

Hi humans:

Unfortunately this isn't an update of Revenge...I'm getting to that. But right now I'm just so blocked on that story and it's really draining me to think about and work on right now so while I promise I will finish it someday, it's going on Hiatus for now. BUT if you do want some more season 1 AU Bellarke stuffs...I am publishing something else I started around the same time as Revenge. It's called Nameless, (and you can get to it by heading to my profile!) and it's only called that because I STILL haven't come up with a name. Please head on over and check it out! I'd love some reviews on that puppy! xoxo - E


End file.
